Love For Sale

Eons ago, in the Tri-Village News - serving Grandview and Marble Cliff (think about it......think about it.....), - my friend Jon and I used to read their classified ads. 

You know, stuff you don't really need or want, but it was ok to look. Actually, we probably did need the stuff depending on what apartments we were living in at the time. 

The two I remember are mostly because we laughed and laughed at the people who placed such ads. 

One was for a "colored tv".  We jokingly said it just played the Jeffersons and Good Times. This was a time when those were the only two shows probably on that had people of colour as leading characters. Yes - it was too early for Cosby and too late for Sandford and Son.

The other ad we found funny, but in reality was probably just sad:  "Wedding Dress $75 - Never Worn".

This brings me to Facebook. I know people love their Marketplace, but I've never been there to buy or sell a thing. I did become a member of their 'Buy Nothing Cleveland Hts" area. 

People - for the most part - are good about posting things they want to get rid of at no cost. Most of them are semi-useful to someone.  Yes, you get the person who opened some food item and didn't like it so giving the rest away (ick!).  But even we gave away a king sized mattress and box springs this way. They had to come pick it up and move it themselves (well, we had already gotten it out of the house). 

I mean, they had a son coming home from college who now has a king bed! I didn't have one of those until 1996 after we got our first house. I'm not sure we even had queens. 

Honestly, I can't imagine them having something to give away that I want, but I look just to look.  .....and yesterday, this happened 

You now me and my lack of fashion sense, but "beautiful dress" seems a stretch. Even I knew that marriage was doomed with that dress. 

Even if you loved it, why would you store it for seven years?  Annulment can't be good - ditch the dress when you ditch the hubby (or when he dumped you). 

Free seems about the right price for that frock. 

Song by: Talking Heads

Death at One's Elbow

I won't lie. I was a little miffed at the lack of response my last Facebook post received. One like.  ONE!  Not even a 'love. I post so little - compared to most - that when I do, and I think it's funny, I like to semi-resonate. Bother. 

While some people use the platform as VagueBook, I try not. I post funnies mostly - or at least things I THINK are funny, but I try not give the folks lobs I do want them to think about it, even for a nanosecond. 

Two days ago was the one-year anniversary of our shelter-in-place order, and nothing was the same again. One thing being: no more handshakes (which I do NOT miss). But I thought of our now 'elbow greetings' - or my faux elbow greeting (show my elbow from six feet away, but still no need to touch me!)

But I thought of Young Frankenstein and posted the above .gif with:  I cannot believe that for an entire year we all haven't been saying: "Taffeta, Darling"........."Taffeta, Sweetheart".

I know my demographic. These people wouldn't (or shouldn't) be associated with me if they didn't get the association.  

Oh wait - I just got a laughing thingy. Yay me!

Well, in the meantime, enjoy Madeline Kahn. 

Song by: the Smiths

Jailhouse Rock

I'm in jail. 

Facebook Jail, that is. 

Most of my FB experience is posting something every few days or weeks. Looking back, Lately I post about 4-6 times per month.  Mostly of pictures with a snarky caption. Others are just memes. 

I rarely put up a political post because.......well....trolls. 

I use Facebook more for a 👍or yes, a snarky comment. Sometimes just a comment - no snark, but maybe some cynicism. 

So, just on Friday, CB posted an image of him with a six pack of White Claw.  A variety pack, at that.  I thought I'd be the first to toss up a comment - full snark. 

....and in the course of about 48 seconds, I was incarcerated. 

I'm not sure which part is the hate.  Is it because I called him 'white'? It's an unpleasant truth, but he is actually white.  Is it because I called him 'trash'?   Becauuuuuuse.......well........

And next to Zuckerberg, everyone else on FB IS 'poor', so that can't be it.  Did the White Claw lobby put an end to my reign of terror?  Will the Southern Poverty Law Center be posting my terrorist notice soon? 

I hit the 'continue' button to find out. 

Yup. It's because he's a cracker. Or has Covid.  I guess FB subscribes to #alllivesmatter, so they can help the Right marginalize the black ones.  

I totally get the need / want for civility, but on some of my quasi-political posts FB might want to take a look at those comments.  They won't because Zuckerberg, as rich and powerful as he is, puckers up to BLOTUS & Co because....well.....$$$ and fear of breaking up his cash cow. 

But FB, if you really want discussions to be 'respectful' you need to look in the mirror then take the site down completely. 

So, by the time you read this, I'll have one more day left in the clink. I'm not sure if I get parole, or how this works. Had I only been Roger Stone or Michael Flynn, I'd never seen a day of jail - virtual or not. 

Since I have all this free time, I guess I will go cure cancer. 

Song by: Elvis Presley

History

I got invited to a private Facebook group, which I immediately accepted, but then immediately thought I should have given it more thought.

The group is on Columbus LGBTQ History.

For those who need a slight Blobby history lesson of their own - I spent 14 years in Columbus and THE Ohio State University, where I met not only 710,  but my besties of whom you read about here......often.

I was "happy" enough just to be a voyeur to this group for the first few days. There seemed to be a lot of drag show pictures. Unlike many, I'm not a huge fan of the art. I don't disapprove of it or anything, but I have seen far far far too many bad shows. My thing is: if you're gonna go to all that effort and get all dolled up (let alone the prep to get make, wigs, shoes, etc), at least know how to lip synch.....or the words to the song you selected.  (though Mr. Larry. who used to cut my hair, was excellent at his drag craft!)

So the drag aspect of this history was not in my social circle. A lot of those posts were lost on me. Ditto with the gay softball stuff - as I never played.

I did kind of on-line stalk some people who posted and commented. I knew some of the folks - adjacently. And then there were the posts from 2012, and while yes, it's technically 'history', it's past my time in Columbus and that all felt foreign to me.

710 and I left town in 1995, and you know before that, homos weren't really taking their SLRs out to the gay clubs, so I have way fewer pictures than most that I could even contribute.

Morty texted me Friday night, asking if it was ok to tag me in a picture he was wanted to post. Of course it was, I said right away...............and then I double-backed making sure it wasn't from one certain night of our lives. He assured me it wasn't, so I said, 'yes'.

You see the picture above. I don't know what look for which I was going back in 1992 (?), but thankfully for all, it didn't stick. I'm there with Mitchell and Morty. I adored both, but it took a long long time to gain Mitchell's approval. In retrospect, I can't say I blame him. I miss him daily!

From that post, one comment came back to me - a very casual friend, who was doing his own pseudo-stalking. He said something we were both thinking - and I'm guessing a lot of people who are posting and finding each other after years are doing the same - {paraphrase} "yes, I'm still alive". 

From that era, if it wasn't potential od'ing or prison time, it was AIDS. There is a lot of statistical evidence present to assume we might not still be roaming this planet. Oh - and since many of us are now in AARP land, natural causes cannot be ruled out anymore.

My melancholy, I think, set in the same way I had it when living in that town, participating in that life.

I had great friends, but the friends of friends, never warmed up to me, nor I to them, so my circle never expanded. I think, some might have recognized me by site, but certainly not by name. Me, being me, I knew who they all were. The odd thing is: I felt left out of groups I didn't want to be in the first place. I'm sure there's a psychological term for that.

Still - those feelings arose while going through all these posted images.

There are some Bruce D posts with all his 'friends' who were all shirtless, tanned and handsome. I was never going to be in that group or get an invite. I couldn't even get an acknowledgement from him when in P-town in 1990. Sometimes you're just not worthy.

I did throw up a test balloon on this group. I posted one of my own pics, the few I had, from a party I had. Two - count em - people liked it. I laughed to myself. Others are racking up dozens and hundreds of likes. I confirmed my absence for the last 25 years didn't really make a mark on anyone.

Honestly, I'm not moping - I totally get these were and are my own insecurities. I just kind of thought I was beyond those - and I am mostly. It was just a weird flashback.

I did reply to one post - a still dear friend - who truly was about the history, and asked to remember those who are no longer with us. While Craig didn't mention AIDS, that's really what it was. It was somber, sobering and endearing.

This also sent me down a rabbit hole for a friend of mine, Stuart, who died in 1995.

I would take him to the hospital and stay with him. I would call his brother collect via a hospital pay phone (no cell phones yet!), to update on progress. Stuart's parents came in the middle of the night - literally - and took him home, where he died. I never saw him or talked to him after they showed up.

So the hole of rabbits of which I speak, has been trying to identify his death notice and place of internment. I know, should it exist at all, it is here in Cleveland. But I think their 'shame' won't have me finding a record anywhere. I haven't located his brother either, just to drop a note. For me getting to think about and process that, I do thank this group.

We will see how long I stick with this Facebook group. It will most likely run in the background. Perhaps my perspective will change, perhaps not.  If we're being honest about FB, some posts are for recognition. I'm not going to get that here - outside of my friend's of 30+ years. And that's ok.

Maybe I'll be a voyeur, or maybe not.



Song by: Bush

Choice?

You know - there are sometimes even friends annoy me.  No........it's true.  (Not you, Morty!)


The statement they posted on FB is just so.........wrong.

I get the poster is a democrat.  I get it he has a problem with people voting for someone else, but I've said it here before, how I choose to vote is none of your business. And vice versa. I don't have to be happy about it for sure (nor does he) but.......really?

Get off the people who vote 3rd party.

What he's saying is:  vote for the least objectionable party.

I mean, isn't that the gist? Naturally there is a flaw to that theory:  which candidate is last objectionable, and to whom?  He's assuming everyone is like-minded. They aren't.

And for the 42,984 times - the folks who voted 3rd part in 2016 got to exercise their right to vote and it didn't stop BLOTUS from winning, but it didn't cause him to win.   Clinton got more votes and still lost.

Still, the idea that voting for the guy you hate least is just a horrible solution. I have no qualms about voting for Bernie in the primary. The democrats shut him out and down. They are as much to blame about pushing the only two party system as the GOP.   They're tactics are shitty and ineffective.

In a later post, the same person goes on to disparage anyone who is pro-Bernie, saying he's too old and feeble to be president and that Bernie and his supporters should just go away.

The irony is:  these folks are the same ones who truly agree with the idea of his plans for healthcare, education, economics.  When it comes down to it, they just don't like him.

But the idea of cultivating a third party where there needs to be a congressional bloc before you would ever consider running a presidential candidate.  That just smacks of the same shit we get from the current two parties.

These folks claim to want change, but in very narrow and specific terms.

It all sounds like belly-aching over something that happened almost two years ago.  Move on. Be the change, but stop bitching about it.



Song by: the Blow Monkeys

Spy

I suppose I should be upset at Facebook, but why would I?

Is there some shock that anyone's internet data isn't being looked at and mined?  Didn't we go through all this with the NSA and cellphones / smartphones just a few years back?

Everyone sells your data. Everyone.

So Cambridge Analytica knows I like dogs, my friends, hate BLOTUS and likes to make fun of Mike.

Do your worst Cambridge!

I'm not one of these people who click on those side ads or news articles. I try to avoid the click-bait and quizzes that people always seem to take, though I really don't know how correctly identifying the character of Knots Landing is really telling marketers, political machines what I'll buy or who I'll vote for.  Is Nicolette Sheridan a Green Party supporter?

Listen, if they can determine I won't vote for that Orange Fuck, by my posts, then it was billions of dollars of consulting cash well spent, I say!

But honestly, every food company knows what I purchase at the store and how frequently. Every bank, restaurant, shop and hotel/airline knows how often I travel and do their predictive modeling to see what and how much money I'll spend and where.

None of this is news.

Sure, you can drop Facebook - but I'm not sure that's the reason. Every webiste you visit, every purchase you make on-line, hell, you see reminders of those pop up in 'ads' everywhere. There is no such things as internet privacy.  You're gonna have to dump a lot more than FB to be 'secure' (oh yes, quotes).

Yes, Cambridge Analytica are heinous, and there are dozens and dozens of companies just like that - they just haven't been revealed so publicly.  Facebook?  They probably sold data. I know they did. They said they did. But their 'agreements' with companies are what they can and can't do with it - because contracts area always adhered to.

So for now, I see now reason to drop some social media, though I have never understood SnapChat.

Of course, now Mueller is looking at Cambridge Analytica (allegedly), so this isn't all bad. I'll take one more round of ammo for his arsenal.



Song by: They Might be Giants

Chinese Democracy

I pretty much have nothing.

The lotto losing thing has me in a funk. I really needed that $759 million.

Life has been work and...well ...work. And 05:00 dog walks.

I would think that the police officers who patrol the 'hood at that time of morning would eventually stop to say 'hi'. Usually I get the searchlight shone on me, as I'm a common criminal casing the houses whilst carrying a light-up dog leash......and a dog.

My goal on these walks is to avoid skunks.  They are seemingly plentiful now. I can guarantee three per a.m. walk. Oddly, our evening walks used to be fraught with squirrels.  I am now on a four day streak of not one squirrel sited. Poor Shep stops and looks up at every tree just to check. He's not been rewarded.

------------------------------------------

In other new...........I took a stupid-ass Facebook thingy. It's not really a quiz.  They look at your profile pic and determine your ethnicity.

Didn't they do a great job?

They at least got one right...............but not the percentage. Not even close.

However - - and it's too bad Birdie is dead, as she would mock me for not smiling in pictures. I would have to (re)explain it because it makes me look Asian.   ....and now I'm 24% Han Chinese.....whatever that is....and I'm not even smiling. So I've data now to back up that statement.

They need to improve their facial recognition software.

I don't usually work for the weekend.......but I am glad this week is over. I'm hoping we have fun weekend plans.......but they seem to be up in the air........................Meredity!



Song by: Guns N Roses

Stream

Oh how I love it when Cleveburgh makes the news.

I debated on whether to title this "Fame" or "Sacrifice' but ended up with "Stream".

...as in streaming video.

....as in, streaming video while I shoot an innocent man on the street.

W.  T.   F.  

Perhaps you've seen it. It made national news. Hell, on Sunday night it led the national evening news.  That's a pretty hefty thing to do when you've got the bullshit of North Korea and SCROTUS matching "wits".

So yes, a man got out of his car while being 'live' on Facebook....went up to a man walking down the street and shot him dead......all while filming.

The victim was an elderly man - a retiree - who was walking home from his Easter dinner. His last supper.....if you will.

Now, on social media, the killer (though why the media is calling him an "alleged murder", when it's right there on video is a little beyond me) is / was telling his followers that he had 'snapped'.

I'm not buying that. People who snap that way, don't know they've snapped, let alone verbalize it.

Also not buying his claim that he killed 14 others either. I would think 14 dead bodies would be harder to ignore, should they exist at all.  That said, my work went on lock-down as allegedly the killing was close by.  It wasn't.

Still, the reason for my almost 'Fame" title is:  is this what social media has become. The need to be noticed so badly that it goes to extremes?  And you thought the Selfie Stick was narcissistic.

Boy were you wrong.

As disturbing as it all was - and yes, they showed the entire thing here in the CLE - I am not horribly surprised. That might be the saddest part of this story................well that the dead man.



Song by: Forest for the Trees

the Attack of the Giant Ants

So, I took to Facebook - kind of - two days ago after seeing this.

I say "kind of" because I didn't post it myself. I commented on a 'friend' who posted it.

First - I'll start off by commenting on John Roberts (?), who basically asked SCROTUS if it is fake news if they quote him on things he makes up....basically, his total misinformation about the Electoral College numbers he got.

They are not the biggest of Republicans or Democrats. Both Bushes, and both Obama elections were larger in electoral votes. SCROTUS' response was priceless.....and frightening.

"well, I don't know, I was given that information. I was given — I actually, I've seen that information around."

I don't know, but I'm going to stand up in front of the press corp and quote it as fact. He'll just repeat anything someone tells him?

Is he the Ron Burgundy of presidents?

With the Sweden "terrorist attack" - the trend continues.

The man has multiple national security agencies working for him - and he gets his intel from Fox "news"?   ....which btw.......I don't hear SCROTUS calling them 'fake news' when clearly they totally reported a fake story that DJT repeated.

But oddly enough, in my FB comment, I didn't rant or rail.

So far no one has taken the bait to respond.

And it's not bait. I. am. baffled.

I get that some news organizations lean one way or the other in terms of how they deliver the news - Fox included. But the out and out misrepresentation of a non-existent event just wows me. And that the president of the fucking united states takes it as gospel because he saw it on tv is terrifying to me.

I know there are a few SCROTUS-loving folks who claim not to read my blog, but do. And if you can comply with the aforementioned "rules" of engagement, I'd love to hear your take. Maybe you side with how he gets his information, or maybe your don't  - either way, speak up.


On a side note: I do find it odd that SCROTUS doesn't use the SCROTUS twitter account, only his personal one.  Is it ego? Is it that he can't say things on a government account that he can on his own? Does he not truly think of himself as commander in chief?



Song by:  Blondie

Breaking Apart

I'm at the point where I cannot tolerate stupidity.

For relationship's sake, I bite my lip more often than any of you would ever believe, let alone give me credit for.

As Facebook goes, I use it, mainly, to post silly pictures, or ones of Petey or of David and I at yoga. I've made a conscious decision to not (or rarely) post political things. Nothing good can come of that - at least if you have a cross-section of the public in your feed.

Unfortunately, I have friends and family who don't feel this way - and post the most right and left leaning things possible. All with little to no corroboration of fact, let alone balance. Because sure, you can post facts, but they only post certain ones, to get their 'point' across.

This infuriates me. But it is horribly common.

A friend was going on about Hillary Clinton and those g-ddamned State Dept emails. And yes, I get that she has fucked the 4-1-1 on this. She could and should have come out stronger on this subject - and really keep hammering about there was no policy against this, Colin Powell did the same thing....etc. But she didn't and the GOP are making hay of it.

This friend was trying to compare Gen. Petraeus' firing over misuse of email and classified material with Clinton. It's apples and oranges, really. But I kind of snapped and dashed off a semi-nasty response saying something similar - along with adding that GWB's RNC (no White House) server "lost" tens of thousands of emails and yet there was almost no press and certainly no investigation.

But then, the wasn't a woman. And mind you, my friend is. So, it's nice to have see misogyny amongst their own gender.

I pointed out that Petraeus was emailing info to his mistress who was also writing a book about him. And that the DOD wasn't the State Dept - different venues, different policies. And that Clinton dealt more with diplomacy and Petraeus with MILITARY SECRETS!

Their response:  have you seen his emails, his mistress or her book?

So, the other infuriating thing:  you can't reason with them. If I didn't see his emails, they don't exist. Yeah - well, I never saw subatomic particle, but they exist.    ......or do they??????

One of my cousins is the same way. I'm "this close" to blocking both of these people.

**********

And this whole Kim Davis thing. I'm done. I can't read or watch anymore. I just cannot.

This self-anointed prophet is too much for me. The followers, the press - mostly in gay blogs - just makes me feel self-loathing even reading it anymore.

While I applauded her being jailed, it's become some sort of martyrdom for her, and the voice grows louder. Though I did love how after her release, she stood between two men who spoke FOR her. But it's the GOP and a Hate Group.  Women are 2nd or 3rd class citizens with them - and they are using her to a T. But she's letting them, so they're all at fault.

I get that Huckabee needs a boost with his low low low poll ratings, so sure, he's making his move there.

What Huckabee does not get - nor any of them, nor are they asking - blah blah blah blah, religious persecution. She's being forced to do x, y and z.

No one - and I do mean NO ONE - has said, that Davis told her employees SHE would fire THEM, if they didn't do what she said because of her religious beliefs.  Where is their religious freedom? No one is making the argument that they are being persecuted by Davis herself. Huckabee certainly isn't.

So I've said it before and again - "mainstream media"?  "Liberal Media"?

Where?  Where are they?

**********

Trump. Palin.

Palin defending Trump on the "gotcha" questions.

One might argue that asking Trump his favourite bible verse was a gotcha question, except for the fact that he brought up religion and the bible. To quote any number of judges on Law & Order  "you opened the door, counselor...."

But the questions on ISIS and Kurd leaders and foreign policy are NOT gotcha questions. Trump is the fucking leader in any poll for the GOP - for the highest office in the fucking country. He had better have answers. But he didn't, so he turned it around and his little butt-girl getting her nose all brown for him.

And people are buying this shit hook, line and sinker.

**********

So while I'm not done with social media, I'm having a harder time engaging. I feel a little sad for some of these people (my "friends"), and while blocking / unfriending them is the easy way out, I'd like to think I am bigger than that. And that I can take in multiple sides of a story / argument before making up my mind............unlike them.



Song by: Chris Isaak

Weightless

I was somewhat taken to task on Facebook for sharing a post of super-athlete, Chris Christie, concurrently showing both Moose Knuckle and Camel Toe.

My comment was that Christie had no access to a full length mirror and / or that he had a full staff of sycophants.

While not addressed specifically back to me, a 'friend' shared my post and asked why people 'fat shamed' other people.

I will go on record that this friend is probably 200lbs overweight. I'm not shaming - I'm just stating from where the person might be coming.

I wasn't really shaming Christie, though I'm sure it could be argued that I was. But there is no getting around the fact that the man and his BMI are out of sync.

However, I might have been shaming not in the fact that he is overweight but clearly dresses like he thinks he is not.

While at my nephew's graduation, 710 joked (I think!) that he was glad I wasn't a Sociology major - and if I were, that my thesis would have been "You're Wearing That?".

And two other friends of mine actually went to high school with Christie. At least one doesn't remember him - and neither of these guys were the ones pseudo-shaming me for shaming the governor.

If I were going to fat shame - and here it possibly comes - I'd have said something about his lap band surgery being unsuccessful. I mean, even Carnie Wilson lost weight the first two times she had that procedure.

I would have said, he did the (unsuccessful) lap band surgery for his probable 2016 presidential run, as fewer voters were going to pull the tab for someone who they'd think would have a massive coronary while in office. As it turns out, his less than stellar presidential polling numbers - and so far lack of announcement - would keep him out of the Oval Office more than his weight.

But that FB post also got me this:

Apparently there is some meme regarding the Christie post of which I referenced. So a friend sent me this. Actually, this above meme entry made me change my entire post for today. I couldn't help grinning.

And since we are just going on a downward spiral and playing the on-going game of whatever the opposite of Non-Sequitur might be, I'm totally stealing this image from D@vid over at Facing Traffic.

I shouldn't have laughed at either of the two above images (but 'yes' to the title image), but I did.




Song by: Thomas Dolby

the Delivery Man

At the end of December (2014), I was down in C-bus visiting Morty & Co.

Whilst at dinner, he axed me if I'd take a birthday present to his friend and former roommate, Dale.

I do anything for the Mort-man and Dale lives fairly close to me - maybe four miles - and if you remember almost five years back (and why wouldn't you?) it turns out I allegedly "knew" Dale before Morty did.

My friends will attest that I have an awesome memory, but for the life of me, I don't remember "knowing" Dale back in the early '80s......and possibly again in the early '90s.

Just due to Mort and those alleged dalliances, I became FB friends with Dale (gentlemen, start your engines: watch all these people now scramble to go into FB stalk mode).

Of course I agreed to take the package to Dale - just not the package I allegedly delivered two to three decades ago. I'd do anything for Morty.

Apparently Dale won't.

After the first month, I finally stopped giving Morty updates on my failed attempts to snag 10 minutes of his former roommate's time. Every now and again, when Dale came up with better excuses, I'd pass them along.

But Blobby is nothing if not persistent. I FINALLY got an agreement for a meeting last weekend!!!! I think it was because I told him that Morty had gotten him a kitten and it has been in my trunk since December 27th (but who's counting???).

(Me, being me, in my mind, kept going back to Schrödinger's cat theory - that since I hadn't opened the package, the kitten could considered be alive and dead - but decided Dale just might find me weird(er) had I brought this up.)

I opted not to tell Morty in advance, in not wanting to get his hopes up.  (and btw, it really was not a kitten!)

Dale picked the place - a hip coffee shop in a hip part of town (see the unofficial Tremont sign in title image - which is in ways is cooler than the official one), in which he lives.

And apparently frequents the coffee shop enough to not have to order. They see him and they make his "usual". They have assorted pastries - and vinyl records.

....as if anyone but brettcajun is clamouring for AARP-ville Madonna singing songs about her pussy juice. Honey - you are 55+, so your pussy juice = Vagisil.  Ditto goes for you, Madonna!   (oh! and Blobby hits it out of the park........)

Honestly, I was hoping that seeing Dale in person would somehow spur a memory of him. But you know, it just didn't. Maybe it wasn't that good of a time. Or maybe it just never happened.

Seeing him (again?) was great. We sat and talked for 90 minutes, about Cleveland, Columbus - but mostly about Morty (nothing but good things Mort - honest!).

We talked about dogs and he had a great story of his beagles when he grew up. One had a litter of five puppies. After two were sold, the rest disappeared.

After days and days, a neighbor told them that there was a bunch of puppies underneath a shed in a back area. It seems the mom was so upset of losing her two puppies, she dug a hole under the shed and carried her three remaining puppies there for safe keeping.

She'd go out there, play with them, check on them, feed them, then go back to the human family. Smart dog. The story kind of broke my heart.

When we parted, I took a pic of us - as photographic proof of the gift exchange - and sent a copy to Morty and one to Dale.

Dale - knowing nothing of my blog (?) - shot a reply back:  "We look Asian".



(for long time blog readers and my Facebook friends - this is my exact reason of why I do not smile in pictures!)


And for all of my short-term memory: I don't think I slept with Dale this time out either. But you just never know....or at least I don't.




Song by: Elvis Costello & the Imposters

Quiche Lorraine

I planned nothing for today's post. NOTHING.

I was thinking posting a Site of the Month, but I'll hold off, as it is so early into the month. Oh, and I have to find one.

Details!

Three years ago I made a Spinach Ricotta pie. I got a beat down by my FB "friends" saying it was  "just a quiche". Queeney Facebook motherfuckers. I just went with the name that Bo had given it.

I felt it was time to make it again, being we are on the verge of anywhere between 5-14" of snow, depending on what report you listen to. It seems like a good stuck in during a snowstorm meal.

My lord, it's not that I am looking for a weather prediction down to a fraction of an inch, but a difference of 9" could make someone very happy - or very very sad.  Am I right CB?

Yeah, I'm right.

And just for shits & giggles stuff & nonsense, I'm posting this.




I love Grandpa Fred.



Song by: the B-52's

Intro

You know, Facebook has a lot of reasons to be a bad thing. I suppose, like anything, it is in how you use it.

I know people who have 700+ "friends". C'mon - they don't even "know" 700 people. But the mentality is those with the most friends wins.   ....and then they block these friends, but still count them in their bucket.

Me? I have no use for that. Hell, I even ignore immediate family member requests. Granted, I have a handful of people who know me through others (though I've never actually met), and a few of you who follow this here blog (whom I have never actually met....yet), but for the most part, those I connect with are friends and a few cousins, whom I counts as good friends.

(Truth be told: I have a former co-worker who I like personally, until he opens his mouth about politics and I just loathe reading his crap, so he just might get shit-canned. AND, he's not even the former co-worker who is now a VP at Fox News!)

Anyhooooo - I've done this on and off series of posts on how I know my closest and dearest friends. Ok, technically, I've only truly written about Becky and Meredity. Oh, you hear a lot about Morty and Jon, but not the true origins. I'm sure those will come in time.

This post kind of covers Morty.

Kind of. Maybe more than kind of.


Around two years ago, I accepted a FB request from someone I will call "Girl Jackie". I call her that, because that is what we all called her.

She gets the qualifier as "girl' because in the soon-to-be periphery, there was a Boy Jackie. I even think, and Morty can correct me, there was a Black Jackie somewhere in that mix. But there had to be qualifiers so people would know which Jackie you were referring.

Even though I had not seen nor heard from Girl Jackie since maybe 1990, she played an ginormous part in my life. And Jon's.  And of course, to Morty, Ditto and Becca.

In 1987-88, for the most part, it was just Jon and myself when going out. Sure, we had FG (don't ask) tag along, but the core was Jon and me.

One fateful night, Jon and I went to an after-hours party at a big empty, soon to be refurbished, house on Columbus' east side. It was there we encountered Girl Jackie.

She was a social butterfly, who had no problems talking to anyone. She and her friend, Susan (Morty / Rebecca / Jon - Susan Lee was her name. I'm not crazy!  She existed) chatted us up and Jackie, with her sing-songy hands, insisted we meet her friends, Morty and Mitchell.

See back then, Girl Jackie would talk as much with her hands and her mouth. Not that she was using ASL, but she seemed to have broken wrists and they'd kinds of lightly flail about as she talked. She'd cock her head side to side a lot too as she spoke. It made her seem a bit, well, flighty. More than she actually was.

Morty was nice and great to talk to. Mitchell, wellllllll....he was a little cold and aloof. Of course, after we parted ways with them that evening, Jon and I immediately talked how Mitchell hated us. We would hold onto that belief for years.

To be fair, and I did love Mitchell, at first he probably thought we were hitting on Morty, as they were dating at the time. And we probably were flirting, though Morty wouldn't have recognized it if we were hitting him over the head with a 2x4.  He might have been drunk!

Later, Mitchell would just be annoyed with me, because on a daily basis, I would most likely be drunk, hanging out with his equally drunk roommate. We were annoying, so he had every reason to roll his eyes and just go upstairs and leaving us be.

Later in bars, Girl Jackie would find us and again reintroduce us to Morty and Mitchell.

Morty, being super social, (I think) invited us to parties, usually where he lived. And it was there a friendship began. That friendship begat ones with Meredity and then Rebecca.  Sure there were peripheral acquaintances too, but the core group was kind of set.

No way Girl Jackie could know what she was doing then - not that we could have either.

Sure it was possible at some point we would have made Mort's acquaintance, but it didn't seem likely. Girl Jackie was a catalyst for a lifetime of friendship.

The irony (?) is that she, being possibly the most social, dropped away and eventually moved to Australia, not that any of us knew that. Until Facebook.

Girl Jackie is back in Ohio for a few weeks visiting family. She made the 9,800 mile trek here, so I felt I could take the last 21 miles to meet her for lunch yesterday.

We had a great time. Though 23 years had passed, it seemed a breeze to chat with her and just kind of catch-up. I've long given up on trying to fill in with people the last two decades of missed connection. And she could piece some of it together from our FB posts anyways.

Hopefully, since she's here for another 12 days, we will be able to get Rebecca and Morty together with us for one more lunch. I'd like Meredity to go too, but I know her plate is full these next few weeks.

So, as lame as FB can be, seemingly for many many 'what I ate' pictures, it does have some usefulness.



Song by:  bt

Someone Like You

I'm sure I've told this story here before, but I can't find it to hyperlink, so I'll tell it again before moving into the second part of the post.

A decade and a half ago, 710 and I invited Becky to Rehoboth for a week of fun. She flew from Houston to DC where we picked her up and drove. We also stayed a few days in DC and at the end of the trip she decided she'd be moving to our nation's capital.  Good for her.

The next year we did the same thing, but picked her up in her new town of Washington DC...and of course stayed a few days.

Anyhoooo.....the three of us were walking up to Kramerbooks and we passed this guy. While seeing him lasted all of a split second, his presence took me aback, but I said nothing and kept walking with the crew.

About a block later, Becky says, "wasn't it weird how much that guy looked just like Blobby?"  I let out a laugh, an exasperated breath and the words, "oh thank g-d, you saw that too!"  all at the same time, thinking I had not been crazy - and that someone else had seen him and noticed.

710 was in the dark, as he never noticed the guy.

They say everyone has a doppelganger and I had just seen mine. It was a little freaky. Now and again, I have wondered if he saw me and has had similar conversations with his friends.

I back-storied that entire scene for this one:

I got a FB message from Brett R (not Brett C) as he was traveling from, I'm assuming, the Netherlands to Paris, as he often does via train.  The e-conversation was fairly real time, and it had me amused, if nothing else that it was transcontinental / real-time.  *Please note - some of the conversation has been edited or combined to keep it more condensed for my readers. 

Brett:  Sure you're not on the train to Paris? Sitting across a guy that could be your twin brother! I was looking at him thinking that he looked familiar...then realised he looks like you

Blob: So take a pic!!!

Brett: Yea....crossed my mind, but he's facing me and Not asleep..will try, though

Blob: Get with the program! I get the pic and you get a blog reference. Everybody wins. Except for the poor sap on the train.

(Clearly poor Brett has never used his smartphone for evil - like taking pics of unsuspecting busboys or pictures for TapThatGuy.)

Brett: Not that I need a blog reference....and fuck, he just moved to a seat which had an empty one next to it... Hang on.

(editor's note:  PUH-leese!  Who doesn't need a blog reference!)

Brett: Here you go....I have to stop pretending to go to the toilet!!!

We went on to mention that he's rocking the bald look, had the earbuds and even the arch in the eyebrow(s).  He's got those thin bony fingers, which are like mine. His nose isn't large enough though.

I thought it, but Brett said typed it: Yea....he wouldn't actually be your twin, but he's pretty damn close.

My reply was: We don't need two of me.

....and assuming he was not the guy from DC, g-d knows we most certainly don't need three of me.



Song by:  Daryl Hall

Cruisin' Love

Facebook is a funny thing. You get invites from friends of friends whom you have never met. Clearly I'm not accepting them just to build my numbers. I'm ok having the lowest number of "friends" within my closest circle.

The other day I got a message (not an invite) from someone who said: It looks like we have some friends in common. I used to live in columbus 83-96 and you look very familiar!

Never a really good sign, is it? Normally it is a recipe for pseudo-disaster. I saw his name - nothing registered. I saw his picture - ditto. I looked at our mutual friends and nothing seemed out of place. Two from Columbus and one from Cleveburgh. Stupidly, or not, I confirmed I had lived in Columbus roughly the same time as he. I was a social being (i.e. drunk most of the time) so it is possible he saw me out.........a lot!

But it gets a little worse: i think we used to "play" on campus. LOL!

This was quite a possibility - back in the day.

Then something clicked in for me: his first name and one of our mutual friends: Morty.

"Dale" was his name. "Dale" was the name of one of Mort's roommates back before we knew each other. I asked Dale if that is how he and Mort knew each other. It was confirmed. At the same time Dale asked if I used to live in a certain place off-campus years later.

Ugh - another hook-up years later. I'm pathetic.

So I have known Morty for about 23 years. Morty has known Dale a little less (I think). I have "known" Dale longer - though I don't know who the fuck he is or remember him from Adam, at least via one FB pic.

Just because I'm me, I did say something to Dale, via email, that I'm not sure how or if we should tell Morty any of this. I hit 'send' and then immediately called Morty - and set the story up WAY better than I did here. He had no idea where I was going with it, and why should he? 15 minutes before, I didn't even have a story.

We were laughing so hard, I was crying.

I sent Morty an email message after the call that was vague enough as a follow-up, but I sent to the wrong person. A good friend, but still the wrong person. Ooops.

The second I realized it was sent, I emailed Mort telling him what I had done - all very funny btw. Enough so that I got an email back from Mort that said, "Oh now I'M crying!!!" .....and then my phone rings - from said accidental email friend.

"Are you talking about Dale XYZ?"

WTF? Does everyone know Dale?? "Oh, Dale's ex boyfriend used to cut so and so's hair".
Screw Kevin Bacon - it can now be Six Degrees of Blobby. Or more accurately, Six Degrees of Dale.

Oh the tangled webs we weave. And by "we", I am only talking about myself.

I can't take all credit/blame for some stuff that goes on within FB. Get this - and this one kills me:

I have two friends, in two different states (not even cities!), who have never met. I get an email from one, saying, "so what's the deal with your friend "Jim"?"

Yes, it turns out one had seen the other in my FB friend listing and contacted the other - basically on-line cruising via the largest social networking site in history. And apparently, I'm their unwilling and unwitting pimp.

I haven't figured out who made the first contact or what the intro was - but don't think for a second I'm not gonna find out. I don't have discreet bone in my body when it comes to this shit. If they are going to use me (well, ok, not really) that way, I at least get the goods on the 'how, when and why' stuff. I want all the dirt.

When I joined Facebook, Morty's partner, George, who might have been my first message when he said "welcome to the vortex". I had no idea how bad it was or how deep it goes.

I'm not even sure if I took the red pill or the blue one.


Song by: Rachel Sweet

Where Time Stands Still

So last night I met one of my old fraternity brothers for a drink. Ok - two drinks. Sheesh - Judgey McJudgersons.

I had not seen Lester for two plus decades, but back in the day, he was quite the man. He was fun and funny and had this Tourette's like mouth - but not in a dirty way, just in a no self-censor mode....about anything. He was also cute in a non-traditional way.

In theory we had nothing in common, but some of that that was due to part of my life I wasn't willing to reveal back then. Too many guys in our house had been found "out" and they were ostracized. I was not at that place where I could just walk away.

In theory, currently we have nothing in common. He is a staunch Republican - and I am not. He is a divorced parent of two - and well, I am not.

That all being said, I still like Les. He's still got a great sense of humour.

The plan was to meet him at his uncle's restaurant and he was running a few minutes late. It was then I had this thought: it's been 25 years or so, how will we know each other? He might recognize me since I have some pics on Facebook, but he only has an avatar of Stewie Griffin.

Ruckiry (not Jon's boss), I got there first and was taking with his uncle. It was he who said, "oh here comes Lester". Thank g-d he said it because never in a kerjillion years would I have recognized him.

Gone were his dark curly Italian locks, only to be replaced by very little amounts of wiry white hair. Added was about 150 pounds to his frame. The dark glasses he never took off did not help.

Do not get me wrong, I know I am not the same person physically. I'm about 58 pounds heavier than my 130 lb frame back then. I certainly have lost my hair as well. The joke is, I didn't like myself much back then - physically or otherwise. But I'm pretty ok with where I am now.

I guess it is just one of those things where you think time stands still in certain ways, but man oh man, does it keep marching forward. We're not the same people - none of us. It's not such a bad thing - you just have to change your perception and state of mind.

His daughter got a big chuckle out of the fact that one her father's fraternity (don't call it a 'frat' - you don't call your country a 'cunt') brothers can grow a beard, yet he can't. There was my win. Not that I needed one.

We still had fun. And it was only two drinks.


Song by: Mary Chapin Carpenter

War Child

Ok - just a dumb little thing in College Humour. But it speaks to me as a Star Wars geek.....and a somewhat newish Facebook member.

....and it keeps this blog going past those 365 blog posts (ok, I've got to stop with this entire year reference, right?).

Of course, not to be outdone by just one social networking site, it seems Darth Vader posts on Twitter. I'm not a follower, but I was amused at some re-tweets people posted on or around Thanksgivng:

Darth Vader: Will be celebrating Thanksgiving this year with my son & his friends on Cloud City. I just know they'll be dying to meet me. 1:49 PM Nov 25th from Twitterrific

Darth Vader: These aren't the drumsticks you're looking for. #starwarsthanksgiving about 4 hours ago from Twitterrific

Yes, I'm queer - but how did you not know this already? I mean, seriously........


Song by: Blondie

Squeeze Box

Do you know how hard it is (that's what she said), to find a song with 'hug' in it? There are a few out there, but I have zero with that included. Ditto with 'Jew'.

Allegedly, today is National Hug a Jew Day. At least according to someone on the consummate knowledge site: Facebook.

The blurb reads: On Friday, November 13th, please aspire to hug as many Jews as possible. The term "Jew" refers to anyone of the Jewish religion, which believes in such values as monotheism and awesomeness. We eat matzoh ball soup :) It's on Friday the 13th because it's bad luck to not hug a Jew XD

But if you look on-line, there seem to be a number of these "days": February 3rd, or the 2nd. One site has it on the 1st. But then there is November 13th, or the 11th. The event is just not that well coordinated or communicated. There seems to be no devoted wiki site, which of course is the source of all truth.

Naturally I accept my invite, because, I mean, who wouldn't? My cousin David responded, 'when is it Slug a Jew Day?'. He wasn't really being anti-Semitic, I mean, he is Semitic.

He's an out there Jew, but I can't say a proud one. It's great fodder for him and he's just fun anyway, so throw a brick wall behind him, give him a mic and put him in the Catskills with a two-drink minimum and he'd be golden.

But people, hug away today. It's been a few thousand years of a hard life. Just keep the hands above the waist, please!



Song by: the Who