Tuesday, October 31, 2006

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Remember when Halloween was fun? I think it still is for a lot of adults. It's ok - but not the end all/be all it used to be. Of course, I'm speaking for myself only. Today is the day I always want to go to a grocery store and ask a clerk "where do you keep your apples? oh.....and razor blades?", just to see if anyone stops me or even raises an eyebrow. I'm betting on neither.

Gone are the days being easily scared at ghosts and goblins. The movies are a different matter. I loved crap like Halloween (the original!). It was tense, yet had moments of comedy. I think the last scary movie I saw was when Jon and I went to Hellraiser. The fish hooks that came out the 'the box' and into the face, then went upward - well, I was done.

My threshold with the kids came about a decade ago. 16-18 yos would come to the door in no costume whatsoever and expect candy. Obviously there are a few things wrong with that entire scenario. Do you deny them and possibly suffer the consequences or do you just cave and give them their one roll of Smarties? I admit, I caved - but only for that year. ...and all the other kids paid the price. While we lived in that neighborhood, we went out to dinner instead of handing out candy. Last year, with the new 'hood, I tried again and no one showed, but had like $13 dollars in candy all for myself!

Growing up in the mid-west (why is it the mid-west? we are like 3-4 states west of the Atlantic Ocean! Nowhere near the west and barely even close to the mid) chances are you wore your down coat or parka over any costume you had as a child while tricking or treating. Well......tricking. You were more likely to find eggs and toilet paper in my pillow case than 3 musketeers or (ick) a popcorn ball!

I do love how adults get into the "holiday". They can be so much more creative at the costumes - but it's really not me. Last time I dressed up, well (and no offense Ade), I looked like my oldest sister - but with bigger boobs....albeit, ones made of birdseed. I blame Mitchell for talking me into it. All the sudden we were at K-Mart buying bras, then borrowing heels from some drag queen. I have size 11 feet and these things were still huge on me. It was (and I was) not pretty. Mitchell looked good - in a Linda Evans kind of way. Morty looked like Gilda Radner doing Patti Smith.

...and anyone thinking I'm scanning an posting any of those pics are SADLY mistaken.

Monday, October 30, 2006

BLOGHUNGRY

I tried a new recipie from Bloghungry. It tasted great - but mine didn't come out looking quite as good as his did. I've never been one to follow directions for cooking all that well, but I did everything......except ensure that the cutlets/breasts where thinner. I didn't pound 'em. That made cooking time take a bit longer and the outer coating to darken more than they probably should have. Did I mention they tasted great?

I also think for the amount of chicken you use, you can cut the cheese and bread crumbs in half and still have plenty for coating the bird.

Did I mention it still tasted great?

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Blobby's Blog

It's kind of working with the new url. The old hosting site/path only allowed for so much traffic - and the hits to the old url continued to increase - not that I'm complaining. Anyway - I hit a brick wall yesterday and visitors got a no-access message when trying to find the blog. Bandwidth was exceeded.

A lot of updates to paths/archieves/ftps blah blah blah. Man those instructions are not easy to follow. Denton had to help with most of it. I'm still missing my images from the old posts - which I just have to work on. They will be back - it's just gonna take a little time. Hang with me.

I still want to change the template and all of that stuff - but this is going a lot more slowly than I anticipated.

Thanks for your patience.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

STILL NOT READY TO MAKE NICE

...and thank g-d.

Though I don't think it will help their album sales (only 2 million copies of Taking the Long Way sold - compared to 10 million each of their first two disks and 6 million of Home), I'm glad the Dixie Chicks haven't shyed away from "the incident".

In this day and age when political ads can and do say anything about anyone - true or not, it surprises me that NBC refuses to air an ad for the documentary Shut Up and Sing. Hell, the movie doesn't even open outside of Los Angeles and New York until after the frickin' election.

Since August, I've seen horrible (and untruthful) political ads run on many NBC affiliates, which clearly they have no issue taking the money for. “NBC’s commercial clearance department said in writing that it ‘cannot accept these spots as they are disparaging to President Bush.’”

Well I find Bush disparaging to this nation. How can I get him to stop speaking on television??

You can view the ad here.

Trailers to the movies can be seen here.

Friday, October 27, 2006

I'VE VOTED

Since my experience with the electornic voting machines during the primary was soooo peachy (see May 2nd post), I have opted to cast my vote(s) for the general election via absentee ballot. Do I really think it will be tabulated with any more accuracy than faulty Diebold machines? Not entirely. Heck, Cuyahoga County isn't even sure they will be able scan all submitted absentee ballots ON election day - even if they start at midnight! But condsidering the inconsistency in the machines and the lack of security in those machines, I figured absentee was the lesser of two evils.

I know the image that goes along with this post is support for the Democratic party...and I do. I am proud and unashamed to be a member of said party. Fudge - after the debacle over the last six years of the Bush administration, the last umpteen hundred years of a republican controlled congress and the last eight years of Bob Taft's dofusness, there had better be a change!!

But I'm not a fool either. I don't just (or always) vote a straight party ticket. If I were that uninformed and ignorant, well......I'd......I'd......um......be...republican!

So yesterday I got out my black pen and filled in the ovals like I was taking the SATs all over again. I completed my ballot and the U.S. Postal Service picked it up today. Let's hope everyone else does their part!

Thursday, October 26, 2006

FLU SHOT

I did the deed and got my flu shot. I always do though.

I am surprised how many people out there never get it and for all the wrong reasons. Oddly enough, "I don't like shots" has never come up with anyone I know how has refused to get one. The biggest misconception is that "I got the flu right after getting the shot".

One might get the flu right after the shot, but it's not because of the shot. Any epidemiologist will tell you it takes up to six weeks to take effect (which is why you get it now - before the flu season of January-March hits!). But here is a good reason to get the injection: you prevent others from getting the flu!!

Yes, you heard me right. You probably have an equal chance of carrying the virus without getting sick, but without knowing it can pass it along to those you live and/or work with. This includes the young, elderly and immunosuppressed.

Take a look at hospital statistics during the flu season - occupancy rates are at their highest, average length of stay increases, which in turn clogs the emergency departments which forces them to go on diversion (i.e. close) due to overwhelming patient volume and basic gridlock of trying to get a patient bed that doesn't exist. When looking at the mortality rates of the elderly during a hospital admission, they die of complications due to the flu.... COPD, asthma, etc. Let's not even get into the healthcare costs.

So, I got mine....for me and for others. I have never had such a painless shot either..and I have had some ouchy flu shots before. This one I didn't even know happened...honest. They gave me a piece of candy aftewards too - but I tossed it because it was sugar free. Why bother? I also got it for free. Look around - many places will give them for no or minimal cost.

Another word of advice? Take one ibuprofen and one tylenol afterward. That will really lessen any soreness that might accompany the shot down the road. A nurse told me that years ago and it works...at least for the first day.

Be a sport. Get a shot.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

I'M IN LOVE
(not another Keith Obermann post)

I always thought there were some weirdly trained cats in any commercial selling food or litter. How these cats jump up and touch noses with their 'owners' just didn't' seem normal to me. Our cats have never done that. Hell, our cats won't/don't sit on laps and barely can stand to be held. Colour me surprised that the new kitten loves to jump up on us and walks right up the chest to go nose-to-nose. I love and have loved our other cats - but she is the most affectionate cat I think I've come across.

Sophie (oh, that is the name we decided on) is doing pretty well. She likes her space and seemingly loves us as much as we do her. As feared though, she became a little ill after bringing her home from the shelter. So many cats there had an upper respiratory infection. I don't know she has that, but she developed some light sneezing Sunday evening - and a little more on Monday morning. I called the vet immediately.

The vet was great in getting us in right away. Driving through a heavy snow (yes! in late mid-October!!), we were embarrassed when they asked her name and we didn't have one. As we sat in the waiting room, I also noticed one eye was runny. Damn - now I knew she was sick.

We sat back in the exam room waiting for the doctor and had time to kill, so we continued our on-going discussion on names. Names were narrowed down, but it became clear that due to pop culture, almost every one had icky connotations...and that boy names would have been easier to choose! So we decided on 'Sophie' as her name. It just seems to fit her. By the time the vet came in with her chart, she could fill in the first name slot.

Sophie was a good girl at the vet. Everyone loved her markings and she just behaved herself oh so well (except for that whole rectal thermometer thing). The poor wee thing only weighs 2.09 lbs.

IF
she is indeed 4 mos old, she is extremely slight - though she doesn't look undernurished. She had a temp of 103 - which is only 1-2 degrees above normal for a cat. Now she is on ointment for the eye for the next seven days and an antibiotic to prevent any other infections for the next 10 days (well, now it's down to five and eight respectively). She's taking the fussing over like a trooper.

She remains quarantined from Tovah until she is no longer infectious - probably another 3-5 days. They are aware of each other, though Tovah avoids the 'forbidden room!'. I'm hoping she sneaks up there and sniffs when we're not watching. Sophie is not fazed - but she just came from a room that had 40-50 cats.

We eagerly await acclimating her to the rest of the house and to become a full-fledged member of the family.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

I HEART KEITH OBERMANN

I swear I'd leave Denton for him! If for no other reason than the commentary he did on Countdown last night. If you didn't see it, please check out Obermann's video commentary. It's not on YouTube (yet) so you have to go to the MSNBC video site . The text version is there too - but you almost really need to hear Obermann's delivery.

I swear a commentary like this is a lost art.

Monday, October 23, 2006

SHOPPING w/BLOBBY

Yet another installment in the drudgery that is everyday shopping. The camera-phone makes it a bit more fun - though I get looks whenever I take pics of products. Like I care what people think!


Imagine my surprise when in the store yesterday and came across Quisp. Has it been out at all since 1972? Has it been hiding behind the Fresca that Morty still purchases (which I still believe had been hidden in some bomb shelter!)? And where is Quake?

For any reader under, say, 40 - you might not know Quisp and Quake. The commercials were almost a Spy vs Spy kind of thing - if I remember correctly. The advertisers played the 'characters' off each other and of course us, the consumer, had to determine which one we liked more.

I was a Quisp man. Don't get me wrong - it had nothing to do with the cereal. I think both were the exact same cereal, just in different shapes. But Quisp were like little bowls that milk would get into. They were probably meant to be half-moons or planets, but I was probably thinking of place-settings or something.

Honestly though, I'm not sure I've had, let alone seen, Quisp and or Quake since the early '70s. It's not that I haven't been observant in the store. I think you all know I am. I just figured that the cereal got pulled to low sales or some kind of FDA recall. ....it was the '70s!

But it's back. And clearly whatever competition that Quisp and Quake had going on - well, Quisp was the winner.


Current image is not my own, as mine was lost in the URL conversion of 2006!

Sunday, October 22, 2006

PLAYING POLITICS

Wow. I missed a blog entry yesterday. That has to be like the first time since June or July. I'm too lazy to actually go back and check. But in my defense, at least twice this month I've made dual entries on one day - so that should buy me something. ...and we have the new girl to look after. No, still no name jumping out at us - and it's very frustrating not being able to call her anything.

Anyhoo...there has to be a way to stop these frickin' swift boater type ads. I'm sorry, but screw the first admendment in these instances. It's one thing to blather on about lies a candidate has portrayed, but either downright lies or as close as one can get to being Pinnochio.

In Ohio, these ads are running saying that democratic senate candidate Sherrod Brown has not paid his taxes for almost 13 years. In reality - Brown had a lien on unpaid unemployment tax from 1992 for $1,776 (ironically enough, the ads don't play up his unpatriotic behaviour on the amount!). The tax was paid within a four month period after being issued, but someone in the Ohio tax office never bothered to mark it as such. It was finally corrected in 2005. So, while being total fabrication in reality, the GOP and DeWine refuse to denounce the ad and the group refuses to pull it.

If New York, democratic candidate for congress, Frank Acruri is being demeaned by saying from a hotel room he called a phone sex line. In reality - Arcuri meant to call the Dept. of Criminal Justice Services which have the same last SEVEN numbers of the phone number. Meaning: he misdialed the first three. Telephone records show he called his intended number less than a minute after his initial misplaced call. Unless he's a REAL premature ejaculator, it's safe to say he didn't really stay on his 'sex call'. The National Republican Congressional Committee refuses to pull the ad.

This shit kills me for the obivous reasons. But the other obvious ones which I have never seen ANYONE ever call out. Bush didn't when Swift Boat veterans did it to Kerry, yet he has the nerve to stand in front of the press in the last few weeks and crap out some statement of 'isn't this convenient that the democrats are trying to politicize something like this..' in regards to Mark Foley - but you could put substitute person or subject matter into the reason.

Bush had the nerve to use WTC images in his 2004 ads, but thinks it was horrible that Kerry used Cheney's lezbo daughter for political talking points. Kerry shouldn't politicize one persons gayness when it was a HUGE campaign issue, but Bush can capitalize on the deaths of 2,749 individuals?

This is DC we're talking about. Everything is political. Everything. Should it be? I'd say 'no'. But this is nothing new and yet have you ever seen a Tim Russert (or anyone else) not only call them on it or counter it w/something they might have done to someone else? Nah. The Steven Colberts, Jon Stewarts and Bill Mahers do - but I don't know how seriously they are taken in the bigger scheme of things.

...but someone should. Shame them all. Make it stop!

Friday, October 20, 2006

HERE KITTY KITTY KITTY

We have a new member of our family!!!!!

Yesterday, we went to Geauga Rescue Village and had the opportunity to have a kitten choose us. We had stopped in over the weekend and were overwhelmed at the number of kittens they had. The folks at the Village said that during this kitten season, hey had twice as many kittens than normal. The good news is, they had less waiting for homes yesterday than they did on Sunday.

It can be so very hard to choose. We had never picked a kitten before. With Kylie and Tovah we got them sight unseen and those were just meant to be. Here, as Denton said, it's like Sophie's Choice....except at Rescue Village they don't put down any animal.

They try to keep litters in one cage, making prospective family members feel like heels if they take one but leave two or three. Perhaps that's just my guilt. The ones who were climbing up the cage, while I found it amusing, I saw shades of what might be in the house and they were put in a lower tier. Ditto with the biters. The choice came down to two little girls. One was so cute, but had an upper respiratory infection. No biggie. But since she was not feeling 100%, we weren't sure how to gauge her true activity level. We had Tovah to consider. They will eventually have to get along tolerate each other.

Fabiano (swear to g-d, that was the name she had on her collar) was the second and smaller kitten, but oh so sociable. She warmed to us immediately. Trotting back and forth between us, putting her nose up to ours and purring right away. After a mere two hours (!!!) of paperwork, she was ours. The length of time there seemed excessive, but this place is thorough. She had already been neutered and had two of her three vaccines - not including her rabies shot, which was also done. She also comes with an implanted microchip....just in case she ever gets lost....which she never will!!!

We have 'Fabiano' sequestered for a few reasons. One is to make sure she doesn't have an upper respiratory infection. She doesn't seem to - but why chance it. Two is that she hasn't known life outside a cage, so instead of giving her full access to the house, we'll let her feel secure with sights, sounds and smells. The biggest reason is to slowly acclimate her to Tovah. The rescue place suggested trying up to FIVE weeks doing this. It sounds good in theory, but unlikely. We'll shoot for two, possibly three.

But 'Fabiano' is adapting well to the sleeping porch. The word 'porch' makes it sound like she's outside and she is not. A sleeping porch was a room in older homes, pre-air conditioning, that folks would sleep in (duh!) in the summer. A room with big windows/screens that would allow for maximum air flow. It is not an over the top plush space - but it's not a cage that she had to share with her brother and sister (see below) in a room full of 40 other cats.


More importantly it allows Tovah no access, though they are now both aware of each other. Some hissing (on Tovah's part), but that's it so far.

To those who are worried - we will not be keeping the name 'Fabiano'. We haven't picked a name at this point, but it is pretty safe to say we have opted not to use Lady Griddlebone, Pinkle Purr, Skanky or Fluffer! Especially either of the last two...because I think it's a rule of thumb that being a fluffer kind of makes one skanky?
TovahTube

Most kittens chase their tail when they are little. It takes them a very short time before they figure out the fact that it is their tail.

Tovah has never quite caught on to this fact. Or perhaps she has and just doesn't care. In the past, she would go through periodic tail-chasing sessions - but it would only be once a day at 5:00 a.m.. During these times, I would not even need to look at a clock, I'd just heard the thump of her weight hitting the carpet as she trapped, or attempted to trap her hind quarters. Since moving to this house over a year ago, I have not witnessed her doing this behaviour. But lo and behold, two weeks ago she started again. This time, in the sunroom and right in front of us. Again - like any good watch, she does it exactly at 7:00 p.m. each night.

To her credit, she does catch it quite a bit.




This was taken from my phone and my first YouTube post.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

OHHH...PICTURES! CHEERS!!!!

You know how every once in awhile do you wonder why the hell you ever subscribed to HBO or other premium channels? I swear if I'm subjected to Meet the Fockers ONE MORE TIME......... Fock Me!

Then you start to consider canceling the service that was originally purchased, so when nothing else was on the other 183 channels you'd have some movie you wanted to see. Invariably, THAT movie appears on one of the stations to which you don't subscribe. Then like an expert drug dealer, they throw you a quarter-bag just as you've sworn off the stuff for good. (Oh I am KIDDING! What would I know about that?) All of the sudden they pull their weight with two of the funniest movies I've come across.

Sixteen Candles

Entertainment Weekly rated the top 50 high school themed movies and this barely eeked into the poll!!!! That g-d awful Pretty in Pink was #1. Are they kidding????? This was so much more quintessential to the high school experience.....and no Andrew McCarthy!

Sixteen Candles was all about the facial looks and throw-away jokes, more so than the obvious ones. Though I love Better Off Dead, this maybe John Cusak's best role, albeit a limited one. Joan Cusak's too - and I don't think she even has a line! The movie is completely quotable and so much more enjoyable than when some lame station like TBS plays it. They will alter less offensive lines but leave in "yes, you're a total fag!". I'm not complaining about that line - it's delivered hilariously, so it really needs to be seen in it's unedited version.

....and it has 'Jake Ryan'. Possibly the only person in the world who could pull off a sweater vest.

What's Up Doc?

It's the best Love American Style episode that never was. Complete farce that works on every level. You'd never think of Ryan O'Neal and Barbara Streisand together (don't mention The Main Event, please!), but it works. And Madeline Kahn has the best film debut ever. Hands down! Again, the movie is completely quotable - and I'm not just saying that because I'm a freak of nature that way. I mean - I am, but that's not why I'm saying it.

Sure, I own both on DVD, but sometimes it is more fun to just come across them while flipping stations and get into their rhythm. And it is a must you not watch them alone, but with friends!!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006


I had purposefully done little with my job search and damn if it didn't come 'round to kick my in the groin.

Before the ending of my former job, I had interviewed for two positions. One of those had not even been created, but my name had been floated around as THE candidate. Or at least I was led to believe. So I kind of sat on my hands (and ass) and did nothing about any other position. All signs pointed to the probability that I would be offered the job. ...and guess what? I wasn't! I have no one to blame other than myself. What the frick was I thinking?

I have to commend the man who interviewed me. He actually emailed to tell me they went with another candidate. Is email the appropriate medium for a rejection? It is the 21st century (it's gonna be much better for a girl like me - or so say Debbie Harry), so I suppose it is ok. I think he did it for a more immediate communique than having H.R. send out a form letter weeks from now - if at all. Anymore you're lucky if you hear anything about any position one applies for. Which kind of takes me back to the other job for which I interviewed. As far as I know, no decision has been made....which is fine. Does that mean I'm still a candidate? I have no idea. None whatsoever.

But on the one job I definitely did not get - even though it was not the end-all / be-all position - it was a job. A good more than decent one. More importantly it would have re-established structure in my life. I'm not doing very well with being free-range. How do chickens do it? Yet it still felt like slightly sucker-punched. Or so was my reaction. For the first time since unemployment, I truly felt depressed.

I think I did the right thing by emailing him back to thank him for the opportunity, blah blah blah - but also to inquire about the pros and cons of my interview so that I might learn from what I may have lacked. I don't know I'll actually get that feedback, but it could happen and he might see it as the mature and professional me. Not that I exhibited any other side to him.

That whole when one door opens / shut thing everyone talks about to make you feel better? Maybe it's not all hooey. Not ten minutes after my rejection I got a phone call to set up an interview next week for a job. I threw my hat into the ring only last Friday. Either I'm that good or they're that desperate. Don't ruin it for me. That statement was meant to be rhetorical.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Cut & Run?



I am so frickin' tired of the campaign ads for Ohio governor and senate races. I'm a guy who changes or mutes them anyway, but it is constant. It is the price one pays for living in a swing state. And it is something I'll endure (as if I have a choice) to swing back to blue.

The governor race, I hesitate to say, is a done deal. After eight ineffective years, the republicans will seemingly be voted out of control. Fingers crossed!

The one that kind of surprises me is the senate race. At the beginning of the year, polling had current republican senator, Mike DeWine with a double digit lead over Sherrod Brown . It is all but a dead heat at this point - depending on which polling data you read. Most has Brown up by 4-5 points, but with a similar margin of error.

IF the New York Times is right, GOP officials have determined that DeWine can no longer win Ohio and they will divert their funding elsewhere during the last three weeks of the election. It would be too sweet if that happened. The GOP denies it - but when are they ever going to admit something like that?

As Edna Turnblad said: "These times, they are a-changin'. Something's blowin' in the wind. Now fetch me my diet pills, would ya!"

Monday, October 16, 2006

Last Night 15 Years Ago a DJ Morty Saved My Life

I always remember my friend's birthdays. I can't say I'm always really good about doing anything about it - other than maybe sending e-cards. Morty's birthday I always remember. If for nothing else (and this is not a nothing!), but he had a big hand in saving my life the night of his birthday 15 years ago.

I'd say it started the day before, but it really started earlier in the month. I had gone home to see my parents and wasn't feeling really well. Just a weird burning in my stomach area. Since I had an ulcer by the time I had hit 24 or so, I didn't think much of it. Took some antacids with out much luck. It ebbed eventually. A week later I got my semi-annual sinus infection and went on antibiotics.

The day before Morty's birthday I attended a reception thrown by the President of Ohio State and ate some unknown hors d'ourves, but not many because I was meeting a few friends for lobster, as one of them had brought back from Maine. I'm not a big lobster fan by any stretch of the imagination. I should have not eaten it at all when there was a question on how 'alive' the lobsters were before being placed into scalding water. But I ate. Lo and behold at 4:30 a.m. I woke up with the worst feeling in my gut. I lay there thinking it would pass. It did not. Antacids did not help. It got to the point where I attempted to make myself vomit. Honestly, I don't know how those with eating disorders perform that act on any regular basis. All I got were the heaves with none of the bile. Probably just as well.

By 5:00 a.m. I started calling any and everyone who had eaten that lobster dinner. Wouldn't you know - no one wanted to answer the phone at that hour - so they didn't. Fuckers! Eventually I got Molly, our hostess, to pick up and she claimed no one she knew was sick. CLICK! It finally got to the point where I called Denton to take me to the Emergency Room. It was horribly inconvenient for him since he had a major paper due that day. But g-d love him, he did.

The ER was empty when we got there, so they took me immediately. Vitals and bloodwork were taken right away. Then back to the exam room where they did the history and physical on me. Xrays were the next order of business. I was in too much pain to stand for a chest xray, so they had to bring in the portable machine. They also took films of my abdomen. Many many many xrays were taken because the technician wasn't all that good at his job. Too high. Too low. Off center. You get the idea. NINE xrays taken to get it right! And even then they said it was inconclusive!

Back to the treatment room where I did nothing but lay on a cart with an IV in me for almost eight hours!!! Nothing for pain. Let it be known that in any other medical situation, they normally take vitals every 4-8 hours. Never once after my initial triage did anyone check vitals or bloodwork again. Eventually Dr. Dick (honest to g-d, that was his name.....and oh how it fit!...but not in a good way) sent me home with muscle relaxers, because he said the pain I was experiencing was from stress. Pain meds were not given, as according to him, since people like me come into ERs just looking for narcotics. oooookay. Denton got me home and into bed where I immediately passed out. I think. He left, dropped off his paper and then went to work.

Seven hours later enter Morty. Morty (and Dith) lived next door to me. We had the only two apartments in the building. We rarely locked our doors and just kind of came and went like a warped version of Three's Company. Or more like Eight's Company when you added in Jon, Mitchell, Slusser, Pat and whomever else! Anyhoo...Morty came in to check on me. He pats me on my bare shoulder as was his attempt at medical care. Immediately he says, "ok, we're going back to the Emergency Room. Now!". Apparently he felt I was way too hot to the touch for it to be anywhere near normal.

A word of advice - when you're having stabbing abdominal pains, don't let a friend take you for a ride to the ER down a rough brick road in a Jeep Wrangler. Not only do you feel every frickin' bump, one must also step up into and down from the vehicle. Hurts just a tad!

This time the ER wasn't so empty. I had to wait and wait to be triaged, let alone to go back to a treatment room. Actually, there was no room in the treatment area. I ended up in what was basically a converted supply closet. Soon, I was joined by another patient - a cowboy from the Ohio Quarter Horse Congress , who got his kneecap kicked out by a cow. We were separated by a sheer curtain.

Denton eventually got off work and came down (he worked upstairs) and he got to relieve Morty of primary caregiver duties. There was no use in him waiting around since it was clear it would be hours before I'd be seen. Finally a surgeon came down to see me. My temperature was up to almost 104 and my white count was through the roof. Mind you - had anyone during the first visit had taken additional vitals or bloodwork, they would have realized this 8-10 hours earlier. The surgeon performed another history & physical - and for the history part, this time I get questions that were never asked earlier. "Are you gay?' I nod, only so the cowboy behind curtain number one doesn't hear. But that's not good enough. The doctor to get confirmation say - "Yes?? Yes you're gay??!!!". Thanks! Then he asks the inevitable potential gay health (read: HIV) questions. Nice for the neighbors. Sure this was a decade or so before HIPAA, but c'mon!

As for the 'physical' part, it was only one part. The doc pushes a finger into where the once diffused pain had now localized. He pushes hard. When he does this, I have no pain in my gut. It's a miracle!!!!! Then he releases his finger. Blobby experienced a new level of pain only reserved for prisoners of war! He's 90% sure it was my appendix and it's bad. Ok - no duh on the latter part of that! He wants to get me up to surgery right away. I think most people would be frightened of going under the knife. I was longing for it - if it meant this pain will be over. Yeah - that is how bad! It turned out there are no beds in the PACU (or recovery room for you folks who watch General Hospital, nor are there any on the hospital floors. My surgery was put off until morning. At least I was transferred from a gurney onto a real bed that is located in the clinical decision unit. FINALLY they allow pain meds....but it's too late. The pain is so acute, the morphine doesn't even begin to touch me. To add to the experience, the 88 yo man next to me croaks out a request every 23 seconds for 'water' that he will never receive. He'll continue to ask until they transport me to surgery.

I am ecstatic when they wheel me to O.R.. The anesthesiologist is really nice and says if he can avoid it, he won't intubate me and just bag me the entire time. Next thing I know I'm in PACU. Nurses all over me, patients all around. It's past noon and they don't know when I'll get a bed. I use the phone next to me and call the Admitting office - they are working on it. For some reason I call Morty too. He ends up telling ME what bed I'm going to be in. Just so you know - Morty doesn't work at the hospital! I tell the nurses who are just amazed. I BEG them to not transfer me at change of shift, because the floor will forget about me. They laugh. Then they transferred me at change of shift and no one comes to see me until almost 5:00p. Not only that, they had no room on a general surgery floor, so I got put on an ortho surg unit. But I had a private room. I'm not disparaging nurses, but man I had some horrid ones (to where I complained to the CEO, Chief Nursing Officer and Ombudsman about two inparticular)....and two really really good ones (who got that in writing also).

It never was relayed to me if the appendix was perforated. The antibiotics I had been taking for the sinus infection was masking the symptoms and warded off some inflammation. The day I stopped those meds was the day before the lobster dinner. There was no laproscopy for me. There wasn't even a traditional suture. No...I was left with an open wound. 7" long. 2" wide. 3" deep. It was packed w/gauze that needed to be changed every 6-8 hours and that I would have to learn to redress - as it would take more than a month to heal. The poison inside my body had to be sopped up, so I could not be sewn up. The gaping hole had to heal from the inside out. It's a beauty of a scar though. I also got an eight day hospital stay w/round the clock IV antibiotics and then another ten days of oral meds.

Looking back, now I can find the humour and actually laugh at some of the things that happened during that hospital stay....including the jeep ride to the ER.

  • Slusser (that bastard owes me twenty bucks!), who passes out at the sight of blood, falling out of his chair as he watched the nurse tried to get me out of bed for the first time - with her letting go of ME to catch him!
  • The nurse who would not take 'no' for an answer on waiting to remove my catheter while I ate my first solid food in almost four days. I swear getting it out was as unpleasant as them putting it in!
  • Dropping three bars of soap during my first shower (l-rd knows I couldn't bend down to pick them up) and Stephanie, a friend and nurse, saying 'if you drop this one - you're on your own!'
  • Becky calling from Houston, to make jokes about how big my inflamed appendix was in comparison to another of my body parts. It hurt to laugh - but my friends were great!!!


I can't discount all the help and friendship Denton and Jon did for me during this time. I assume Denton would have checked on me during his ride home, but that was three hours from Morty's insistence on taking me back to the hospital.

Maybe I should also thank the fuck-up of a radiology technician too. On my second day back at work (four weeks later), I get a call from the Emergency Room saying they found 'something' on one of my xrays and I really need to see someone........



....Oh......and happy birfday to Mort!

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Two Ends of the Musical Spectrum

It's Sunday and I got little going on - so I'll leave you with just some random thoughts.

A few months ago I posted about a CNN contest on what is perceived to be some of the worst songs in popular music would be - and I gave my own thoughts. I really need to add one to my list. Don Henley's "Dirty Laundry". My g-d is it awful! And I might note, I was stuck in a place where I had to endure all 22 hours of it. What? You say it's only lasts three minutes? Really??? Go figure!

On the other hand, I heard a great lyric on THE RADIO! As I've mentioned here before I rarely listen to anything but NRP because commercial radio sucks so badly. But I wasn't driving, so I navigated the stations. I happened up on a song I only heard the end of, but immediately liked: 'hate' is a strong word....but I really really really don't like you. I have not heard it again - no shock - but it seems it's by a group call the Plain White Ts . I don't know about the group, but the song is kind of worth checking out.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

THE SPY WHO SHAGGED ME REDUX



....well....kind of. Austin wasn't running for governor of New York. But it would be a killer t-shirt to wear. I'm just not sure it would fly outside of NYC - on so many levels!

You can get via Cafe Press ....in a few different styles and in other garments besides shirts.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Go Barry Go??




Sure he's a republican.......oh, and dead, but is he any less a potential candidate than those out there?

Actually, if you have HBO and have the opportunity, check out his granddaughter's documentary Mr. Conservative: Goldwater on Goldwater , I highly suggest viewing the program.

Though for his time he seemed like a majorly right-winged GOP'er that would eventually spawn the likes of Reagan, Bush and Bush, Goldwater accurately declared that in his lifetime he would be seen as liberal. When compared to what was coming down the pike in the republican party, he was right on th emoney.

He held the beliefs that religion, sex, aborition should play no part of politics. Ever. He voiced concerns of the religious right and their influence on politics. Now the GOP is ruled by what the religious right says, or even thinks.

Goldwater might be the perfect Democratic party candiate for 2008! ....except for that dead thing.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Record(s) of the Month

I figured I'd do a monthly 'what I'm listening to' kind of thing. This could be viewed as a lame placeholder kind of post. And probably it is. But it's my blog! So there!

These may or may not be newly released disks. They might not even be a good disk - just what is been in heavy rotation in my car (as usually the iPod is playing anywhere else).

I really tried to narrow it down to one Blondie disk. I'm finding that difficult to do. Sure I could have spread them out and had picks for three separate months, but that didn't seem fair to me or to you. The greatest thing about Blondie was that they never repeated themselves. Each and every disk stands alone and doesn't reflect much of their previous work. Frustrating for radio, I'm sure, but who cares?

Though my friend Jon and I relate on many levels (scarily it seems sometimes), I think our first connection was our love of Blondie. Honestly, I knew no one who liked them - and certainly knew no one who had heard anything other than what was spun on radio.


While much less 'new wave' than the two previous Blondie albums, Parallel Lines is undoubtedly their biggest commercial disk. Two major hits ("Heart of Glass" and "One Way or Another") drew the masses to the disk, but they weren't the heart of it. Remember, I'm going from my vinyl days, so the first tracks on sides 1 and 2 ("Hanging on the Telephone" and the bestest "11:59") were the some of the best songs for me. On my (or was it Jon's?) Yahoo Radio Station - "Fade Away and Radiate" came on. Dith was not impressed. Jon and I told her she didn't know what she was missing. The entire disk is so worth a check out - even if "One Way.." is now used in a commercial for both a car and Swifer. At least the band is pulling in some cash!


While not as commercial as Parallel Lines and not as original as Autoamerican, Eat to the Beat is a great disk. It has some misteps ("Victor"), but overall it's a truly enjoyable disk. Sure,"Dreaming" was the first (and a great) single, but when they played "The Hardest Part" on SNL, it sealed the deal. I still regularly spin the entire album, but I am especially fond of "Slow Motion". Why it was never a single or a huge hit is beyond me. For chirsakes, it has Lorna Luft singing background vocals on it!! LORNA LUFT!!! (She from Grease II fame! Oh and what whole her mother & sister relationship thingy.) WTF?!!! But for the other stuff ("Die Young, Stay Pretty", "Shayla", "Atomic", etc) - it's a fun fun fun album.


Autoamerican is quite possibly the best Blondie record that was ever released. More eclectic than any of their other releases and probably the second biggest commercial success they had. Though I don't know that I'd call it a rap song, 'Rapture' was credited for being the first #1 Rap Song ever. It's ok - but as years have gone by, it remains the weakest track on the disk. I'm a much bigger fan of "Do the Dark", the instrumental/spoken word "Europa", the jazzy "Faces" or country-tinged "Go Through It". They even pull of Lerner & Lowe's "Follow Me" from Camelot. This is not a record to be pigeon-holed.

If you want to hear other Blondie material that isn't on the 23 separate greatest hits or compilations (or copulations as a former 'date' used say it), I'd do these three disks - but would never turn down a spin of Blondie, Plastic Letters or The Hunter.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Unemployment Sucks

Week two of unemployment isn't really working for me (no pun intended). I am such the creature of habit - or was - that it is a little scary not to know what to do with my time. So in turn I do nothing.

First off, and perhaps it is TMI, but I have only achieved about a 50% success rate at showering since my last day at the office. Used to be, I was out of the shower by 5:30 a.m. I haven't really been going anywhere, so my lack-of-thought-process has been 'why bother'. And that whole thing of never being able to sleep past 5:00 a.m.? Out the window. I've been getting my sorry ass out of bed at 7:00-7:30 a.m. Granted, I'm usually awake now between 2:30-4:00 a.m., just lying there petting Tovah. Because if I look remotely alive and/or awake, she's right there wanting pets and yelling at me. Who am I to tell her 'no'?

I'm letting myself mope just a little while longer. I really didn't even think I'd mope at all - but that is turning out to be a fallacy. Maybe 'mope' is the wrong word. I'm being lazy. I need to be more proactive about this whole job search thing. And my posting a few weeks ago on getting a hobby? I guess I should be a little more serious about it.

Everyone who has gone through this keeps telling me just to enjoy this time and to make the most of it. Maybe that will kick in. So far it hasn't even shown it's face.

Right now, I just keep hearing Laurie Anderson's 'White Lily' in my head: Days go by.....endlessly....endlessly pulling you....into the future.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Site of the Month



Yes the site is titled Stitchy McYarnpants! Dith and Becca both knit (allegedly!) and Dith found this site.

Take your time - look around the site. There is more ugly shit here than you can shake a stick at.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Lost

No, not the show - though I'm sure I could write something on that. Everyone else has! Blah blah blah - purgatory. Blah blah blah - dream. Blah blah blah - no resolution.

Now that I write that, maybe my life isn't too different than the folks from Oceanic flight 815.....except for the expertly groomed facial hair that never seems to grow past a certain length after months and months on the island.

Last week I must have set my alarm on the clock. When I was working, I would set it but rarely would it go off, as I normally woke up prior to it detonating. Then last week I didn't need to set it since I didn't have that pesky thing that most people call 'a job'. But one morning at 5:20 a.m., NPR came on. My immediate reaction was - 'wow - I dreamt they eliminated my job and I was out of work'. It lasted all of 15-30 seconds before I realized it was not a dream. I meandered downstairs to get a bowl of Honeycomb.

Since last week was my first week of a possibly extended break it wasn't bad. The 50th anniversary gave me focus. Days were spent shopping for the event or preparing the house. There is a certain relief that is all over. But my biggest loss is that it is all over. I woke up this morning with a nagging 'now what?' hanging over my head. It's still there. I guess, at least today, I feel a little........(say it with me)......LOST.

I guess I could actually start a full-blown job search. I really should do it too. Though I still have two possible job opportunities at my prior organization, it IS the time to explore other places - right? Part of me wants to take the easy route and just wait for one of of these two (or both) positions to be offered to me. Are they the right ones? Am I making a mistake even thinking of staying there? Then there is the possibility that neither job will be offered to me and I'll be screwed. I guess this is my own personal purgatory w/no resolution. (also no sandy beaches, blue water, or doing shots then driving w/Anna-Lucia!)

WWJD.



..that's right: What Would Jack Do?

Sunday, October 08, 2006

We're Golden

It's over. The 50th Anniversary Party for my parents, that is. It went well. Actually it went very well - going off without a hitch and no major incidents. No drama. No family meltdowns. No surprises. Sure, that doesn't make for a very exciting blog entry, but it's just how it went.

The prep to the house got completed about 15 minutes before people started showing up. The entire place looked pretty frickin' good, if I say so myself. People oooh'd and aaaah'd over the house - by those who had never seen it and those who had seen it prior to the downstairs re-do.

True story. Funny story. On Thursday, Denton went down to the florist to order flowers for the living room, to be delivered on Saturday. The florist, whom apparently was described as an over the top Rip Taylor (eeek.........oh.....and shock!) said he was making a delivering in our neighborhood that day anyway. When he got our address, he said, 'oh, that's where I'm delivering flowers to on Saturday!' I don't know if there is a code of silence/ethics to floral delivery, but if so, he breached it. Turns out Rebecca and Andrew had ordered flowers for the event - which was extremely thoughtful. Even moreso, since I never got a chance to call her to thank her and wish her a happy birthday!!! The flowers were purdy too.

The food was great - at least I heard it was!!! Chef Bob did a bang-up job pulling stuff together. But playing host is hard. As I was running around, getting drinks, or greeting arrivals, It is safe to say I never spent more than seven minutes w/anyone person - and never in a row. I missed the entire cheese and fruit plate. Never got to touch it. I did snag the last two shrimp of the two different platters. The homemade cocktail sauce was incredible. I did get some tenderloin, salmon, orzo salad, and the other pasta dish, but well after most everyone had eaten (I'm not complaining). Everyone was asking for recipes for some of the stuff - so it was well liked. The yellow and red tomatoes in mozzarella and balsamic vinegar were very good. Everyone seemed to enjoy the cake too. My littlest niece was VERY disappointed that she didn't get a flower from the cake. They were real - and not edible.

Our other big outings have been for close friends - and though I do care to make a good party impression on them - they are easy-going and can fend for themselves as needed. Heck, we've been friends for 18 years and up, so there is a certain informality with them. With extended family, former neighbors, and co-workers of parents so on, one must perform. It's exhausting!

Some lessons learned from an event like this to be sure. There was no lack of food, that's for sure. We could have done with about a third less of the main dishes and still had plenty. So much for going by head counts!!! We had about 55 attendees - with about four to five people who came that were not expected and two last minute no-shows (I'm not complaining).

In the future, I'll listen to Denton about the bar. I figured beer, wine, vodka and gin would be all we needed. He insisted on scotch too. I poo-poo'd it. Who drinks that, I thought. Wouldn't you know, as hard liquor goes, more scotch was downed than the rest. Heck - I don't think a drop of gin was poured. So much for my perception.

The take-aways though were my parents, who were very pleased with the event. They had fun and didn't have to do a thing. Starting at 5:00p was good. I think everyone was gone by 9:30 - though the clean-up took us another two hours, but that was ok. I mean we couldn't come down in the morning smelling salmon left-overs, could we??

I'll post some additional pictures later. But it's over and we're tired!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Winders



I just thought I'd mention - as we get ready for this party tonite, yesterday I decided to wash some windows. A few months ago we got a quote from some firemen who moonlight clieaning windows: almost $1000 !!! Quite a difference from the $100 they charged my parents for their windows - inside and out! But since our house is 60 years older than my parent's house, with ours you can take the grids out to make it easy to clean. No, that would be too simple. Here you must do each pane individually.

Completing the dining room, front entrance, side entrance, living room and only part of the sun room, I have done 343 panes of glass. I didn't get another 60 panes done. And this was only downstairs!

It's safe to say my hands are quite raw. And that the quote of the window cleaning firemen is TOTALLY worth it!

Friday, October 06, 2006

WHO? WHAT? WHERE?

I'm not being paranoid. I know I'm not. Ok - maybe I like a good conspiracy theory.

Major GOP debacle this week (two if you count Bob Woodward's book) and then gas prices rise $0.16 in one day !!! At least they did here. Nothing says attempted diversion from any true issue like energy prices.

Though really - I don't think anything is going to distract from Hastert. Let's face it, Foley is only one of the symptoms to much bigger issues.

Idiot Bar


I've never used, or needed to use Apple's Genius Bar. That is until the last two versions of iTunes came out (7.0 and 7.01). The gapless playback they introduced in 7.0 rendered my iTunes basically useless. It had to update each and every song in my liberry! We're talking the 8,500 songs of the 14,000 I actually own (I don't have some things loaded in - like classical music, some mood/ambient music - or Cher - which technically isn't mine).

7.01 was supposed to correct it, but really didn't and now we're talking hours to restore stuff...and I still don't think that will be 'the fix'. I had some other iTunes issues and the on-line Apple support site wasn't really answering my issue(s). So, I made the trip to the actual store.

First, you have to make a reservation for the Genius Bar. Who knew? So you must use one of their Macs to do it. But no instructions on how to get to the reservation site. Go figure. Then you have to chose between a Mac problem and and iPod problem. Technically, mine was neither. I chose iPod, because the wait time was 40 minutes shorter.

I will give them this - they took me 10 minutes earlier than my reserved time. But here are things you really don't want to hear from the genius behind the bar:

"I have no idea" and "Umm....I really couldn't tell you".

Whatever they are paying these guys - clearly it is too much! (this is sarcasm!)

I'm still very much pro Apple, the product. But I have rarely had a good experience in their stores. I know computer guys are usually slightly dweebish and should know more about the product than I do - but I don't need the frickin' tude on top of it. I already bought your product. Here's a little advice for the staff: Cut the fuckin' snob routine.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

FLAMER FAGGOT

Certainly I have no allegiance to Mark Foley nor do I condone anything he has (allegedly) done. But will it now fair game when MSNBC allows Pat Buchanan and host Joe Scarborough for calling Mark Foley a 'flamer'. Where does/will it stop? And what exactly will the threshold be for name calling?

What kind of (I said 'kind of'!) is unfortunate, is that on the McLaughlin Group, Buchanan has been the voice of reason - as scary as that sounds. But last night was a meltdown that puts him back in his rightful place as Right-Wing Loon.
VIRAL MARKETING

Maybe it pays to adverstise! Or maybe I just have a filthy filthy mind. Or perhaps I just picked the wrong vowel.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

TAKING THE F TRAIN

A post over at Habitat 67 (which I try to read daily - if nothing else for the occasional posted pics of Garkawe....who btw gets a year older today!!!!) reminded me, in a roundabout way, of one of my more memorable subway encounters.

It was my second to last day at Cadwalader, Wickersham & Taft. For being there such a little time, I think people really liked me. On this day, after work they all (well not the entire firm!) took me out to Aye Carumba, up on W. 4th - which I don't think exists anymore (the establishment. The street is still there). No food and many many jumbo margaritas. I think at the time I weighed all of 140 lbs. Imagine what that combo does to a boy of 21 (start doing the math! go ahead!).

I finally told whomever was left that I had to go home - figuring if I was this drunk it had to be 2:00 a.m. Turns out it was 8:30!! P.M. !!! Yes, that's how drunk I got in four hours. I gave a big hug to my new best friend, Fred, as he headed home to Staten Island, and would not be coming to work on my last day. (Fred, if you're out there somewhere, write!) Frank and his wife were headed back to Brooklyn too, so we walked stumbled to the subway together. Before going into the station, Frank insisted we get food in our system. Probably good in some ways. Painfully bad in another.

Back to the train - Frank and spouse boarded whichever line they took to go home. I waited for the F. But standing was sooooo tiring. I thought I'd sit. And sit I did.....on the edge of the platform with my feet dangling in the tracks. I knew what I was doing. Right?? The horrified looks I got from other passengers told me they thought less of my behaviour. I saw the light of the approaching train in plenty of time to get my sorry ass off the ground and my legs weren't even close to being cut off by the front car! Geeeesh.

At that time the F train was one of the few lines that were air conditioned. It felt comfortable against the summer heat. Blobby immediately sat down and passed out. It could have been crappy ride. I could have ended up at the end of the line. To be honest, I didn't know where that was. I never ventured past my stop in Brooklyn (save ONE trip to Kings Highway - don't ask!). But it was my lucky day - as the train pulled into the Carroll Garden station, I awoke. But the second I stood up and proceeded to the doors I knew my luck had run out.

For those who don't know (which I assume would be most of you), Carroll Gardens is a really nice neighborhood-y stop. Not a high traffic hood, few businesses and consisting mostly of residences. A place where if people didn't know you, they'd have no issue stopping and questioning you. So there wasn't a lot of people getting off with me. I knew I was going to be ill, but figured I would hold it until the train departed the station. As it did, I approached the tracks to do the deed. I lean in and what do I see? Another train approaching!!! F@#& !!! So I hold it. I'll wait until this train pulls out, I says to myself, I says.

Or so I thought. Train stops. Doors open. People start to de-train. Blobby HEAVES. All over the platform. Suffice to say - it was not pretty. It was no problem, at least I don't think it was, to walk the two blocks home. But after there, I actually got my contacts out and then promptly dropped the case behind the toilet. I knew enough to leave them there. If I were to attempt to retrieve them, I'd have ended up there too. As it was, I woke up in the morning with every single light on in the apartment. How'd THAT happen?

I only thought I was green around the gills the next morning that is until I arrived at my last day of work (avec glasses) to be greeted w/bunches and bunches of cream filled pastries. UGH. New waves of nausea like I had never experienced before.

....and I (almost) never touched tequila again.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

PILLOW TALK

What does one do when they are out of a job?

SHOP! Of course!

It started out with the need for groceries, but that would end up being our last stop. After heading out, we stopped at a number of places where we might pick up something for this golden anniversary party for my parents. We bought nothing. We found nothing.

Since I am still in need of glasses, why not look at more frames? I can't say I found too many more frames I liked that were not posted here a week or so ago. Naturally the two I did find yesterday and somewhat liked were the most expensive of any frame I have ever seen or bought. And not by a few bucks - but by a Benjamin. I couldn't make a decision, so nothing was selected.

I know this sounds mundane, but hopefully the big coup of day was a pillow. For the last few years (yes, you heard right!.) I have been on the hunt for a good, even decent, pillow. Maybe it is because I have some abnormally large head (shut up!) or perhaps it is all the rocks in it (REALLY - shut up!) - but my noggin goes right to the mattress through the pillow, no matter what kind I try. I do believe my lack of good head support is a reason I get less than six hours a sleep per night, none of which by the way is in a row.

In the recent past, I have purchased medium, firm, extra firm and those memory foam pillows. I'm the frickin' Goldilocks (if I had hair, that is) of headrest! Add to those, the ones that are advertised for people who sleep on their side. I can't stay comfortable. Using two pillows is too much and my neck gets cricked (is that a word?) and one isn't enough. Let's add to it that down pillows are not even an option. They do nothing but aggravate my allergies, which naturally makes it that much harder to sleep.

Today I purchased another two pillows. One is hypoallergenic and one is another type of firm. Granted I got this at Blood Bath & Beyond, so I'm thinking if these don't work, and I'm already ruling out one of the two, I might have to suffer through.

I won't go all Grandpa Simpson-y or Monday Moaning-y on you, but really - how is one supposed to try out a pillow in a store? They are wrapped in plastic and you can't really put your head on it. They are like buying gloves. Stay with me here for a second. You try those on in a store that is 68-70 degrees. They all seem warm. But get them out in the harsh reality of winter and your finger tips become appetizers for the Donner party.

Ok. Maybe I did go all Abe Simpson on you.

Monday, October 02, 2006


MONDAY MOANING

Yes, you might get used to multiple posts during the day. I mean, what else do I have to do with my time. ....I mean besides find employment??

In my pseudo on-going series of Monday Moanings that The Cleveland Plain Dealer publishes, there are quite a few today. Actually, there area number each Monday, but most of them just lame and not nearly cranky enough. I like to think today is a little different.

"Since the metric system didn't work, why do they keep putting it on bottles and jars? Come on. This is America." - Brook Park

"Now that English is the official language of the United States, the word 'plaza' should be removed from buildings and malls. Plaza is Spanish for 'public square.' " - Cleveland

"Why do the State Highway Patrol in Ohio wear such silly hats compared to the other law enforcement officers?" - Parma

"It's very hard to find a toothbrush to fit into the old built-in wall toothbrush holders." - Mayfield Heights
INSERT ADULT FILM MUSIC HERE

YAYYYY. Soft core porn comes to FoodTV!!!

I've missed Nigella since she disappeared off basic cable television a few years ago. But really - no one quite enjoys food like she does.....and without the money shot. Usually.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

HELLO, YOU'VE REACHED...


One of the funniest things I've heard in a long time happened yesterday. What ever happened to the classic telephone salutation? Caller I.D. - that's what!

Returning a call from a friend who shall remain nameless (to protect the not so innocent), the person on the other end doesn't respond, "This is...." or even "Hello". No, this is the way it the telephone was answered:

"You've interrupted the Hilary Duff E! True Hollywood Story!"

I could not stop laughing for about two full minutes (time it - it's a long time!). Tears in my eyes. Laughing to the point where Person X finally said: "It's not THAT funny!" But it was. On many many many levels.

...and yet a little sad. Mostly on his/her part!