Sunday, January 31, 2021

Chaos & Piss

So..........I had a little something done on Friday.......

It was really about inner-beauty.  

The inside of my peen that is.  Peen to the bladder and then the kidneys. 

After a regular doctor's appointment last October, my standard urinalysis showed microscopic amounts of blood in my pee.  Like 0.1 micro-somethings over the normal limit. Nothing visible.

But so did the repeat test a week later. So my doc insisted on a visit to the urologist. Bother.

That visit was ok, and I liked the doc a lot, though he told me about needing a cystectomy...........or a scope through your pee hole. UGH. 

I was none too thrilled at this idea and told him so - and he refused valium ahead of time....though I was only semi-joking about that. He showed me the scope and said, "see...........it's not that big".  My reply? "It's still bigger than the entry!".  

Oh - how we laughed. 

I resisted the I'm sure oft used line: "...not even dinner and a movie first?".  My friends will be happy to tell you, i've done a lot more for a lot less. 

I said we'd have to hold off until after my nasal surgery, as that took priority. It seem my time was up two days ago. 

I tried not to fret about it, but - {shudder} - fret I did. But I went by myself. On purpose. I told no one. Literally. 710 included. I didn't want to talk about it, or think about it. Or fuss more than I was internally. 

I was told I wouldn't feel a thing. That was a great big fat lie. 

Well, first off, I assumed it would be the doc putting in the scope, not "Gladys", the 79 year old nurse who probably came out of retirement due to Covid staffing issues. I was wrong. It was Gladys. 

Due to this, I got to hear Gladys' tales of identity theft ("she got off easy this time, but if there's a next time she goes to jail!") or the first dog she got, as her grandmother keeled over and they found the dog lying next to the body. She also berated me for not getting my CT scan done - not that anyone had told me to get one. Not that anyone had actually put an order in for me to get one. Somehow I'm the one to take the brunt of this. None of this was doing anything but putting annoyance on top of anxiety. 

Then the {finally} doc came in - and the bi-directional comedy show began. 

As any medical professional is now required to do - after confirming your name and date of birth, they ask YOU what they're to be doing today. So I says to him I says: "you're scoping my peeper".  He corrected me: "Pecker Checker".   He laughed. I laughed. Gladys groaned disapprovingly. 

Women!

I was none too thrilled with Gladys' insertion of the scope before Doc Lee came in, but I assume that would be the worst. It was not. Was their severe pain?  No, there was not. Was there weird uncomfortability? Yes.  Yes there was.  We both acknowledged it. 

We somehow talked about urology and I said his choice of profession was on him. He could have been a podiatrist. And he went "ewwww.....feet!".  My retort: ".....said the man holding my schwing schwong".  He laughed. I laughed. Gladys?  Not so much. 

Then came the scope itself. I got to watch. It was like spelunking, looking for 12 boys stranded in cave in Thailand. Gladys said asked if more KY was needed. Dr. Lee was all - "as much KY as he wants!"   

W.T.F. ? 

I raised an eyebrow and he just chuckled. If nothing else, he was all the way in, how and where were they going to apply this so-called unlimited supply of lube? 

Then to test the kidneys to see if blood shot out of them, they had to apply water. So he told Gladys to squeeze a full bag of saline.......and then harder.  He looked over and goes, "no worries - not your bag".  Gladys was not amused. Blobby was. 

If nothing else, it was a decent distraction from having a tube snaking through my snake. 

Preliminary good news: no seen sources of blood. I don't think the CT will show anything further up, but I suppose, at my advanced age, it's better to be safe than sorry. My father battled some tumors on his bladder, so my history indicates this as a possibility. 

I got through it. No drugs. Just a two drink minimum show.  ....though I told him we should really write a sitcom. 


Song by: P!nk

Saturday, January 30, 2021

Cold

Winter time pet pics. Only Shep's are winter-themed.  It's been a pretty freezing week. Sophie is safely and warmly ensconced inside. 


The late afternoon Winter light really plays well with his colouring. 

Shep's daycare days let's playful Sophie come out - along with every toy. 

Polo fields - with a 50' lead for running.  He loves it. 
I'd love to let him off leash, but I fear that'd be the last we see of him. 

Making herself comfy on the sofa. 

Same sofa. Different animal. 


I know I'm biased, but she really is a pretty girl. 

Frigid time at the lake. 
My one ungloved hand for that 2 minutes was freezing. 



 


Song by: Annie Lennox

Friday, January 29, 2021

57 Channels (and Nothin' On)

While I haven't been thwarted in my goal-quest for 2021 movies, television does sideline me. 

I've lamented a bit before about so many things being on tv, yet so few of them to watch. Or want to watch.  Or what to watch. 

We all have friends who refer us to programs. Far too many - programs, not friends - to even consider watching. And then of course one's particular tasted must be considered along with which of the streaming services one has. 

I, for one, aren't going to watch the gory stuff, and I'm not a fan of the zombie, witch, occult, vampire, paranormal, dragon genre as most seem to be. 

So - since I'm not writing much about politics (hopefully), perhaps I'll do an on-going series on what is on TV. 


the Crown - season 4

I'm underwhelmed. 

Oh, Individually, I think the main characters are good at their craft. As the stories go, or the telling of them. Meh.  Perhaps it is because I have lived through this era of this monarchy and seen so much in the papers and television have repeated so much of this over the years that it's nothing new. 


That said, Gillian Anderson as Thatcher is something to see. She is great, even if the woman she is portraying is not. I don't know why they just don't hand her the Emmy now. 

I have grown to like the guy who plays Philip. Charles has his moments, as does Anne.  The other Windsor boys are just not good. Colman is quite good, but two years of her is fine.  I love Helena Bonham Carter, but this is a role with which she does almost nothing. 

Then there is Diana. She's not bad - and bares a resemblance. But yikes - it's painful to watch on multiple levels. And as I've said, we've seen it happen already. At least with Claire Foy's portion - all of that was well before my time. 

I find the best episodes not to be about the royals. I think the one about the guy breaking into Buckingham Palace - twice ! - was one of the more interesting ones.  

I guess will about season 5 and 6. I mean - Delores Umbridge as the Queen? 


You can catch-up with the entire season in a little over two minutes. Honestly, save for the Bonham Carter one, the impressions are fairly spot on. 


Thursday, January 28, 2021

My Boyfriend's Back

Some times you have nothing on deck with which to write about. And now and then, fortunately, or un, that 'thing' will just present itself. 

Cloris Leachman - funny woman extraordinaire has died.  Bummer. 

Oh, sure, we all loved the Mary Tyler Moore Show and while it's easy to defer to Rhoda or Sue Ann Nivens (with SueAnn it's always first name and last name!) as highlights of the show, I was a Phyllis guy.  They lost a lot when she left the show. (And her solo show, Phyllis, SUCKED). 

Of course, Cloris was so much more than Phyllis Lindstrom. 

I mean - c'mon - look above. Frau Bl├╝cher.  Her Young Frankenstein character portrayal was an instant classic. It is highly unlikely that could have happened had the part gone to anyone else. Leachman played it to perfection. 

Ditto with Nurse Diesel in High Anxiety, though to be honest, I'm not sure that would have been as good if not playing off Harvey Korman. 

I now feel the need to go back and watch the Last Picture Show, for which Cloris won an Oscar. Dith will be shocked (shocked! I tell ya!)  that I haven't seen a Larry McMurtry film adaptation, but I haven't. 

I did love the first season of Raising Hope, which was on a few years ago. Oddly enough, Leachman was the weakest link in that show. She was fine and all, but Martha Plimpton stole that show completely. 

Still, on MTM, I think her confrontation with Sue Ann Nivens having an affair with Lars was still funnier than any time she played off Rhoda - which were great too. That there alone made me love her. 

....and when Mel Brooks thinks you're one of the funniest people around, folks should take notice. Though I think they did. 

Sorry to see Phyllis go. But 94 is good long life. And she made me laugh - and no doubt will do it again, when I watch her body of work. 




Song by: the Angels

Wednesday, January 27, 2021

Maximum Swearing

It seems I'm intelligent.  Possibly honest. 

With all my surgeries - I have a high pain tolerance.  I'm creative - though this blog might dispute that completely!  

I am not a physical fighter and, I speak the universal language. 

No.......not the language of l'amour. 

I swear. 

A. Lot. 

According to CNN - and aren't they the bastion of knowledge? - my language choices, as potty-mouthed as they may be, can make me all those things above

I think we all know George Carlin's (and the FCC's) "seven dirty words". But according to Mr. Krabs - and isn't he the bastion of knowledge?  - he claims there are 13. And he'd know, as he was a sailor. 

Upon hearing SpongeBob and Patrick's language, Mr. Krabs threatened them with 40 lashes. 


Actually, if you have an opportunity to watch the SpongeBob episode "Sailor Mouth", I truly highly recommend it. A. it's HILARIOUS.  B. think about being a grown up and watching it with kids.  Sure sure........most the bad words are dolphin noises, but as it turns out, I bet you all speak fluent dolphin. 

So think about it - I might be the smartest most creative person you know.  Honest. 



Song by: Reel Big Fish

Tuesday, January 26, 2021

the Rise and Fall of Intelligent Design

As 2021 movies go, we are kind of 0 for 3. 

The Prom can breathe a sigh of relief that it will not be the worst move we've seen all year. 

Nope. 

That title now firmly resides with the new Melissa McCarthy vehicle, Superintelligence

If the movie Superbad wasn't already such named, they could have just swapped out 'intelligence' for 'bad'.  And that said, both the Prom and this POS HBO movie both star James Corden. 

I think we have 2021's least common denominator. Or greatest?  James Fucking Corden. 

I can't lay this at his feet. Everyone is super bad (see what I did there?).  McCarthy is lame. How dare they underutilize Bobby Cannavale? Jean Smart - horribly horribly wasted. The only ones who walk away unscathed are Octavia Spencer and William Daniels who just do voices - and yes, Daniels does reprise his voice of Kitt from Night Rider. And their voices are one time that last less than 20 seconds each. 

Oddly, this is on par with many McCarthy movies. Someone I know - who will remain nameless - loved Tammy.  Ugh. Dread - and not only for Susan Sarandon. Don't even start me on Identity Theft.  She fares slightly better in Spy (which also has Cannavale) and for some reason, I found her to be hilarious in the Boss

Director Ben Falcone - who is McCarthy's husband, and also did Tammy and the Boss (so he's very hit and miss too....more miss) - just fails here, though whomever wrote this pile is ultimately to blame. 

In a nutshell, McCarthy is selected by an overtaking AI to determine whether the world should be saved or destroyed.  S.N.O.R.E.   Melissa can't even save this movie, let alone humanity.   (Not Really A Spoiler Alert: she totally saves the world!!!) 

Honestly, the star of the movie just might be Seattle - and I'll give Falcone this - he doesn't even invoke or show Starbucks once, though the ubiquitous Pike Place Fish Market is right there. 

Superintelligence didn't merit one smile, let alone laugh, from either 710 or myself.  Not. One.  It was a little over 105 minutes and seems so. much. longer. 

Like so many others movies regarding technology -  War Games, A.I., Her, Ex Machina - you have your cautionary tales.  

Here's another one:   P. U.  Steer clear.  You've been warned. 


2021 Movie Count / Goal: 03 of 15


Song by: Rodney Crowell

Monday, January 25, 2021

My Music Monday

I only slightly know OF Jason Isbell, but haven't really sampled his music. But on XM's Coffee House - which is usually just artists doing acoustic version of their songs - I finally really listened to his "If We Were Vampires" . 

Maybe it's just the aging process. Maybe it has been a year of Covid telling us all we might die alone in a hospital. Maybe it's because I'm clearly a falls-risk, but I've contemplated my own mortality more and more lately. 

The then-impending 36th anniversary didn't help matters when hearing the nice, yet slightly morbid lyrics: 

It's knowing that this can't go on forever 
Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone 
Maybe we'll get forty years together 
But one day I'll be gone 
Or one day you'll be gone 

I've mentioned here many-a-time (but for those who are newer, this will be new) my preference is to "go" before 710 - as highly unrealistic as that might be, knowing my families longevity. So, again, these lyrics hit close to home. 

However, I AM a falls-risk, so that opportunity still exists..........fingers-crossed!


Sunday, January 24, 2021

She Makes Me Laugh

 I honestly have nothing. 

This might not be a bad thing. As I mentioned yesterday (?), with no past administration currently in power, my writing topics have dwindled..........almost overnight. 

Nothing in the news seemed up there in terms of something. 

But I was watching Family Guy the other day and this clip just made me laugh and laugh and laugh. And since this blog's subtitle is 'Stuff & Nonsense' - it's time to interject some of that here. 

It's 21 seconds.  Deal with it. 





Song by: the Monkees

Saturday, January 23, 2021

Shake

Just another Saturday with pet pix.  

Honestly, what am I going to do with all my free time now that I'm not BLOTUS Bitching? 

Sophie has taken to the leather chair lately. She's very adorable there. 

Wintertime lake walk shake.

String. 
710 will regret pulling this out, as there is no 'off time' with Sophie. 

Someone was informing 710 that it was 16:30 and almost time for a walk. 
I got a text asking of my ETA, so we could walk as a family. I left work immediately. 

the lady of the house. 

We had our 36th anniversary on Thursday. 
This pic was taken at 05:45 that morning. Best present ever. 




Song by: the Gap Band

Friday, January 22, 2021

Poet

How great is it that we have a poet laureate?

And how great was Amanda Gorman? 

While I alluded to yesterday, I watched none of the inauguration live, I but I did catch somethings after the fact. 

While I am indeed gay, I didn't feel the need - nor ever have, nor ever will - to see hear / feel / smell / taste Lady Gaga.  Double that in regards to  J Lo. 

And sorry - but not - all the fucking people who bitched and moaned about the last four years, and then they start picking apart fashion choices.  Is it that impossible to just enjoy the moment?

Don't worry - the question is rhetorical. 

But I was awfully impressed by Amanda Gorman, at 22, the youngest poet laureate. Mind you, I though part of her poem was too much about her, though that was part of its charm. 

Of course, her charm was her public speaking ability, her confidence, her brightness, her talent.  At 22. 

Oh, to have one ounce of her confidence and talent at any age. In my early 20s it was unfathomable. Strike that - I was too inexperience (and probably drunk) to know it was unfathomable. 

I hope great things come from her. I feel she might be a force with which to be reckoned. I certainly hope so. 


Song by: Bastille

Thursday, January 21, 2021

Come Together

I watched none of it. 

The inauguration. The pre-inauguration. The day before either. 

My stomach was in knots, my anxiety level barely contained. 

I'm no fan of Pappy Joe, but BLOTUS (I mean, he still is the Biggest Liar, so......the title stays) is vindictive and temperamental so there was a whole day of waiting and wondering what he might do - up to, and including, having Air Force One crash into the Capitol dome. 

I'm not kidding. 

I'm not thrilled with Steve Bannon's pardon, but not surprised. Well, maybe a little. They had such vile words for each other, all I can suspect it that Bannon has a bunch of shit on BLOTUS. Ya kinda gotta wonder what 'Lil Wayne knows too. 

And IF BLOTUS truly left a letter for Pappy Joe (which I'm not sure I believe at all) and was 'generous' as told, it's the opening salvo of a 'please don't come after me' plea. Ditto with his not heinous send off about the new administration. It's a little too late to be building bridges. 

Of course, the other anxiety provoking measures were Proud Boys, White Boys....and worse, White Realtors. Clarification: White Women Realtors.  And any of those with shoulder mounted missile launchers. 

I mean, you gather every ranking Democrat in one place - and #moscowmitch (who they now see as an enemy) and well.........it spelled easy pickings. That all worried me more than Ivanka getting off by daddy's hand.............and you can take that anyway you fucking please. 

That said, I was happy with Pappy Joe and his getting right to work. Not that you'll remember, but it was my suggestion months ago that he should forgo all the hoo-ha and just sign 13,091 executive orders undoing anything the previous administration had put their dirty, slimy fingers on. 

He did like 17. All good ones. Paris Climate Agreement. Ending Keystone pipeline  and Arctic drilling. Dreamers/DACA support. Stop paying for Boarder Wall shit. Covid financial relief.  All good!!!

And for the first time in forever, I watched a press conference. 

Jen Psaki wasn't perfect - and she had a few missteps, but nothing major. She's not Sarah Fuckabee, Sean Spice or that last one - the white tramp. I was able to sit through the entire thing - which by the way, is the first time there was a press briefing on an inauguration day. She stressed transparency while also giving slight, but professional, jabs to BLOTUS & Co. 

All seemed quiet on the western front. I'm sure it wasn't, but what little I saw of the press, I didn't see coverage of bunches of Karens and Chads complaining about shit.....with guns. But I don't expect Joe's words of inclusion bringing folks together - however, he should have stopped saying "those of you who didn't support me" or "opposed me", I felt just it kept the divisiveness going. Not that this speech was truly going to heal wounds, but still........

Here's hoping Pappy Joe keeps doing the right things. I hate to see Executive Orders be the way of the land, but since BLOTUS ruined this country with them, it seems ok to at least use them to stop the reckoning. 

Of course, Joe has one more things to do - and only he has that power:  cut off BLOTUS intelligence access. Traditionally, former presidents get it as a courtesy.  Fuck tradition, in this case. And fuck it hard!


Song by: Echosmith

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

Cooking with Blobby

In my 12 of 12 last week I mentioned how the kitchen still smelled of curry from my cooking the evening before. 

That smell would stick around for a few days. It was not horrible or anything, but the lingering odor is certainly distinguishable. 

I used curry to make a pineapple chutney. 

I had never made this before. I've had chutney before - but usually it was a mango variety, but I couldn't find a mango in Ohio......in January. 

And of course, I've seen Chutney. I mean, Legally Blonde is possibly the most played movie on broadcast television since Overboard

I just love that whomever wrote that movie opted to name a character 'Chutney'. 

But here we are, a week later and we had salmon again last night. And we had all the fiixins for pineapple chutney. 710 liked it so much the first time - as did I - that I thought........oh, what the heck. 


Ingredients (to serve 2-ish)

Rice Wine Vinegar        1/4 cup
Honey                            1/4 cup
Chopped Onion             1/4 cup
Chopped Pineapple.      1 1/4 cup
Curry                              1 tsp
Red Pepper Flakes        1/8 tsp

Simple. 



Mix / Whisk all the non-pineapple ingredients together. 

Then add the pineapple.  Last time I mixed all together and it was harder to incorporate the honey easily with the fruit already in the bowl. 

Simmer it for a bit. There is really no liquid other than the vinegar and honey. I guess some natural pineapple juices, but not lots. It doesn't really cook down much or thicken. 

The flavours meld together here and everything warms through. 

It looks much darker than it actually was. Lighting and all. 

The sweetness of the pineapple pairs nicely with the savory curry and red pepper flakes. BTW, first time I did an eighth of a teaspoon, by "accident" this time I did a quarter. You could feel / taste the heat, but it was all in a good way. 


The chutney is a good compliment to the salmon. We like it a lot, but we'll have to be careful not to overdue it too much. That shouldn't be a problem, since I don't usually have fresh pineapple in the house. But come mango season (is there a season?) look out..........I'm gonna be a-tryin' something else. 

Monday, January 18, 2021

My Music Monday

I don't know from Pretty Reckless, but maybe I don't need to? 

I was (am?) intrigued by their song "25". It starts off with a "Dear Prudence" vibe, and then immediately segues into Bond-esque theme. Let there, it would have been fine. Good even. 

There is a total need to shift gears in there for the chorus, but the transition doesn't really work. They become two different songs in a way. And I don't know about the counting piece per line. That part goes on far too long. 

Still, there is something appealing about the song - though I believe it to be more about the music than the lyrics. The lead singer's voice has promise though. At least there is not notable auto-tune, and that's saying something these days. 


Sunday, January 17, 2021

Site of the Month

Apparently, every year the Ohio Bureau of Motor Vehicles releases a list of the vanity plates that they have denied. 

The list is quite extensive. 

And a bit racist and dirty. And very pro BLOTUS and anti BLOTUS too. 

There's a of FCK and BCH. And pro-Klan and anti-Semitism. Many something with the addition of AF. 

You want people to be more clever than they are. Honestly, there was some I don't think that should have been rejects, but in hindsight, I am happy not to work for the BMV. 

Here is the list. 

Saturday, January 16, 2021

Ivy

Pet Day!

Cat in a box.  Oh, how they love that sh%t. 

Shep on a winter time walk #1

Well, someone looks comfortable snuggling with Dad #2.

Winter time walk #2 - just later the same day. 

This is Ivy. She's a fun girl who liked getting pets from me. 
And I liked giving them to her. 

Office help. Pretty AF. 




Song by: Old 97s

Friday, January 15, 2021

Ad of the Month

I'd say a gayer ad has never been shown, but we all know that is a lie.  We've seen plenty. 

First off, from all I can gather, Range and Land Rovers are nice looking cars but shiteous - ironically, especially in snow. I just chuckled a few years back at a brand new one not being able to get up their already plowed, though still snow-covered drive. 

But Range Rover seemingly has a lot of winter sports ads - allegedly touting their expertise in the cold months, including their heated / massaging seats, which bring these boys to the point of orgasm.  And if I'm being honest, there is only one of the two you want to see in that position. 

....but you get both. Like it or not. 

Wednesday, January 13, 2021

12 of 12

 So I'm doing my 129th 12 of 12.

Normally it is 12 pictures taken on the 12th of the month. Since I only post once per day, you get my images the following day. All pictures taken with my iPhone. Click images to enlarge, if you choose.

Created by Chad Darnell and picked up from, what I can tell, any number of random bloggers who then link back to him and vice versa. Chad is no longer doing this, nor is successor coordinating the linking of other 12 of 12'ers anymore. Erik is back and I think he's picking up 12 of 12 again. 

05:00.  Putting away dishes from night before. 
I had made a pineapple chutney to go with salmon - the kitchen still smelled of curry. 

While this was my first shot of the day - I thought I got an earlier one at 03:59. I had been up for a while. I just had a rough night - two in a row, in fact - thought I took a pic of the clock, but seems I didn't. 

05:57.  What to wear?  What to wear?  (I went left)


06:10.  Parking: complete

09:46.  Strategic planning. 
Oddly enough - already looking to 2022. 

12:04.  When you gotta go..........

14:19.  Different bathroom time. It wasn't a 2hr;15 min pooh. 

14:30.  One way or another I'm gonna eat ya, I'll eat ya, I'l eatcha eatcha eatchay. 
I pretty much had back to back meetings from 08:00 until 14:00.  So, no lunch 

This was my lunch. It was not good. 

16:23.  Prizes. 
Well.........something I paid for arrived. 

16:30.  Welcome Waggin'. 

17:06.  One more work call. 
the AMA has updated billing codes for some ambulatory visits. 

17:47.  The call is still going on. AirPods will travel on dog walk with 710. 
I needed the steps, as I almost never left my office. 

It was FREEZING out.  Actually below freezing.


19:57.  710 made dinner.  
Fettuccine. Brown butter. Garlic. Red Pepper flakes (a LOT of them) and parm. 



There it is folks.  See ya in the funny papers