Sunday, October 31, 2010

All Dressed Up

I like the idea of dressing up for Halloween, I just don't like dressing up for Halloween. Is that odd?

When the day rolls around, I feel the need to be creative in an area where I'm not normally creative. So I don't dress up.

My last somewhat original costume is now seemingly too offensive to put in this blog without upsetting any number of someones. Hell, it was offensive back then. It was back in my fraternity days and while I still think it was kind of funny, it turns out the "girls" didn't like it then and the women of today are probably in their camp.

I think it was fairly safe to say I wasn't out really to impress to many women, even way back then. Maybe their brothers, but not the girls.

So I don't, and won't, dress up. It is just not me. Hell, I've mentioned before, since we moved to this house 5+ years ago, we haven't had one trick or treater. I'm considering not even purchasing candy for a safety fallback. Naturally then we'll get a ton of kids.

Oh oh oh.........(Mr. Kot-ter!), we did stop in this Halloween specialty store, only because it was near the Apple store, and I had nothing better to do. You know these stores, they take over an abandoned space and do up lots of holiday crap like Halloween and xmas......then - poof - they're gone.

So this was the best costume I saw in the store. Ok.......not the best, but the best named. Same diff.

Hehehehe......Howie Feltersnatch. CLASSIC.

I've been hanging onto this picture for at least a month now - dying to use it, yet knowing I had to wait. Yes, I know I'm 12, but I've made no secret about that. Every time I say the name, I make Denton laugh. Hell, I make me laugh.

Speaking of snatch.......that reminds me of a story I am not quite sure I've ever told here, but on the other hand, it seems like I have. I've told it so many times over the years, it's hard to remember when and where I've relayed it. Eh - I've got a bunch of new readers who aren't gonna bother with the archives, certainly not if I don't. So here it is........

About 20 years ago, my friend Jon and I were having dinner out and the table next to us were a couple who we determined were married, but not to each other. The "woman" asked the guy how his fish was, and he responded, "tastes like snatch". Her response? "Whose?".

Jon dropped his silverware on his plate. I only think 5% was for affect. The rest was out of pure shock - and the man does not shock easily.

We told a few nurses back at the hospital of our story and poor Terri was going down that hall, "what'd he call it - snootch? snitch?......" And Lynne responds, "no, SNATCH!". Mind you this was in a complete tiled hallway, so every word reverberated.

I was dying!

...and that dinner was really scarier than most anything someone on Halloween could conjure up.

Song by: Damien Rice

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Over at the Frankenstein Place

I'm not sure it's really a Halloween movie, but somehow Frankenstein is tied in with the holiday.

I have only seen the original Frankenstein once. It was hilarious!!!!

Unintentionally, but hilarious nonetheless.

I was in 7th grade and my oldest sister, during one of her breaks home, took me to a community college near our house for a double feature: Young Frankenstein and Frankenstein - in that order.

Young Frankenstein still ranks as one of the best comedy movies ever. Almost every line is quotable ("sedagive??"). And of course, a stellar cast. Even at my young and tender age, I realized this.

Since I had never seen the original Boris Karloff version, I had no idea that, while not a shot for shot pre-make, it was eerily close. And it made what was a once probably a 'scary movie' scary, now it was almost as funny as the comedy remake.

But back to Young Frankenstein, I guess. While I love Madeline Kahn ("taffeta sweetheart..."), in the original Frankenstein, there was no bride of. Elsa Lanchester came later. Four years later, to be precise. Clearly it works here with Kahn. She uses every syllable to perfection in what little of a part she actually has in the movie. Ditto with Teri Garr. And Cloris Leachman.

It is a time commitment, but I highly suggest renting/watching both movies in that order. If not, then I always suggest you watch Young Frankenstein.

Song by: Barry Bostwick & Susan Sarandon

Friday, October 29, 2010

I'm Scared

Still in major work mode, so I'm not being horribly creative here, though the time to think up the answers are taking longer than I would have thought. I stole this meme from Spo and thought it would be easier than it is. Once again, I've been proven wrong.

1 – What was the scariest movie you have ever seen?
Scariest? Oh that has to be Maid to Order with Ally Sheedy!!! FRIGHTENING!!!! The writing, the premise, the acting!

Oh, ok, seriously, I'll go for The Other. Some violence but more of an underlying sense of creepiness that just totally haunts the movie.

The last scary movie I purposefully went to see was Hellraiser. The fish hooks in the face that were then pulled upward ended any love I had of scary movies.

2- What was your favorite Hallowe’en costume as a child?
I was fourth in line of kids. Granted, the only boy, but any thought process with creativity from my parents mother had gone by the wayside. I had no favourite, since it was Ohio and probably snowing, chances are you wore a parka over whatever costume you crafted or bought.

3- Given enough money what would be your fantasy Hallowe’en costume?
Given enough money, I'd want to go as Bradley Cooper. Looking just like him!

4- When was the last time you went trick or treating?
I'm guessing before I hit my teen years. If I went out afterwards, it was for mischief (or drinking), not candy.

5- What is your favorite Hallowe’en candy?
I always liked Smarties. While I like chocolate, I was never the biggest fan of milk chocolate and I had not yet discovered dark. So Smarties were a good choice and you could never overdo it with them. But Milk Duds seem like a close second.

6- Tell us about a scary nightmare you once had
I have lots and lots and lots of dreams, some of which I blog about here. Some are unsettling, but I don't recall any that I would consider a nightmare. Nothing involving Ally Sheedy.....thankfully.

7 – What is your supernatural fear?
No toilet paper in the afterlife.

8-What is your ‘creepy-crawlie’ fear?
Cockroaches. They utterly disgust me!

9- Tell us a time you saw a ghost or heard something go bump in the nightNot only have I blogged about this, but I've guest-blogged about it too. I'm happy to say, I feel pretty vindicated that not only one other person saw "the ghost", but Rebecca felt him too...pokin' at her. No, not in that way. She's a classy lady! But I've linked the posts. And since I moved almost {gulp} 20 years ago, I have not had another Casper encounter.

10- Would you stay overnight in a real Haunted House?
I lived in a haunted apartment, so what's the big difference if it's a house? Hauntings are not always this violent thing, so, yeah, I'd definitely do it.

11-Are you a traditionalist or a creative carver of you Jack-o-Lantern?I have not carved one since my now 19 yo niece was 6 months old. I was stuck at my parent's house after my appendix was removed and thought it'd be fun to carve one for her, since it was her first Halloween. It was a traditional carving, but if I did it now, I'd be more inventive. ...and I'd only do it to get the pumpkin seeds so I can salt and bake them.

12- How much do you decorate the house at Hallowe’en?
Not at all. We're 80 feet off the road with just enough barrier that not many can see the house and what they can, you can't really decorate.

13- What do you want on your Tombstone?
“It's SO Dark in Here!!!!!”

Song by: Duffy

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Record of the Month

I figured I'd do a monthly 'what I'm listening to' kind of thing. This could be viewed as a lame placeholder kind of post. And probably it is. But it's my blog! So there!
I hate to say it, but I'm largely unimpressed with Intriguer, the new disk by Crowded House.

One way I know I am, is that I've owned it since July, haven't written about it because I can't seem to sit through it in its entirety like I have most of their other disks.

Clearly Neil Finn is an extraordinary songwriter and I've thoroughly enjoyed the first four Crowded House albums. Even when he performs with his brother, Tim, or the relaunch of Crowded House with Time on Earth, those disks have a handful of decent songs.

I guess the same could be said for Intriguer, but on a lesser scale. I cannot quite put my finger on it but something isn't clicking. Maybe it's them, perhaps it's me. Gone is the place where art and whimsy meet and you're just left with nicely crafted songs that don't seem to have that spark.

On their last disk, I cited that declining spark to the loss of a original member, but I don't think that's it. I think it is just changes over time, for my tastes and Finn's direction that he's opted to go in. If it works for him - great. It's just not working for me.

It's all very listenable, but not a must-have group for me anymore. Yeah, it's more inventive than most of the crud out there on the radio, but this isn't making radio - even satellite.

Unless you're a huge fan, which I thought I was, Intriguer is probably not for you.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Say That Again

Becky made a comment on my blog yesterday from a post from almost a week ago. That's not really too bad, in length of time, considering she only reads my blog when forced to go there when we, as an email group, reference something about said blog, and she's left out of the loop temporarily.

Anyhooo - it was the post about me being called a 'fag' and she actually did point out that, "couldn't you find that KitH skit to go with this?"

And you know what - I totally meant to attach one with it.....and then totally forgot. ....and since I was traveling the last two days, I really don't have anything set-up to post, so you get the after thought.

Song by: Crowded House

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Site of the Month

It seems I haven't had a really good Site of the Month lately.

g-d, none of you remember when I tried to pull of Site of the Week years back. Disastrous. It turns out there aren't 52 great sites per year - and think if you had to multiply that by eight years? Yowza!

As it is, I'm pretty much serving up shitty sites - so you can only imagine how low I'd have to get to do this continually or weekly. It's why I have also opted not to start my iPhone App of the Month. How long before I got to reviewing faux mugs of beer that disappear when you pretend to drink from your smartphone? Or the iPhone/Bic lighter. BORING!

And while this month's SotM isn't sustainable with on-going anything - it is a one entry blog from 5+ years ago - it made me smile and laugh.....if nothing else for the title.

But, that being said, I still think you should read the entire entry of....................wait for it.......


Yes, you end up knowing the outcome, but it is really about the journey - isnt it?

...and thankfully, there are no pictures.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Green Grass

If you remember, a month ago - maybe a month and a half - I blogged about the sprinkler system we were putting in. Mostly the idea was for it to do the plants, but no reason if we were shelling out the bucks, not to do the yard.

Our lawn has always been iffy and this last summer just ruined it.

We have, what we call a courtyard, which gets little sun, so growing grass as always been a challenge. I even wrote that the below picture wasn't indicative of our bad summer. It is just the way this part of the lawn has been progressing over the last few years.

Yes, the summer made it slightly worse, but not by much. I was ok with bricking it in for a great outdoor entertaining space, but we're trying for yard least one more time. Looking at this above picture, I wasn't holding out for much hope.


...three to four weeks after thatching, dropping down grass seed, and well, using the sprinkler system on a regular basis, things are looking up.

For full disclosure, it looks better from this angle than standing right on top of it, but you saw it from this angle in the top image. So, we are getting there.

No, we realize we are not there yet. But next year, I think we'll see incredible results. I wish I had taken pictures of the front lawn. Part of it looks like green carpet - it's really coming rebounded - except for under one tree. That we might mulch around and forget trying to grow grass there.

I'm cautiously optimistic.

Song by: Big Audio Dynamite

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Cup of Kindness

For the hell of it, yesterday we went to Dean's Supply, which is basically a restaurant supply story - or a party supply place.

It's basically like the Barg'N-Mart where SpongeBob goes for all his spatula needs (he even has a little song about it).

I was slightly disappointed, but that's my own fault. I worked at enough of restaurants in my life where I should have known what I was gonna see. But I think deep down I was hoping we'd find something for whenever we entertain - which isn't a lot, but still........

I was underwhelmed. We left empty handed. And their spatula selection was unimpressive.

I did like how you didn't have to look up and down the aisles for your plate and plate size selection. This display was just fine.

Ditto with cups. Maybe even better than the plates. better than the plates.

This is just a small sample of some of their non-fiesta Fiesta ware, and chafing dishes, and such.

It looks promising, but looks are deceiving. It would certainly get you through a nice picnic, but most of the stuff I'd want or need is more permanent stuff. This is great if you're a caterer though.

Still, I might need to come back here if we are to host my father's 90th. That is still up in the air, though we are approaching it quickly.

Song by: Emmylou Harris

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Angst in my Pants

I really have almost nothing to write about. Lucky for you (or unlucky, depending....), I said "almost".

Blame my cousin for this one. Jeggings.

Blobby, for one, has never heard of them. But unlike an inordinate number of my readership, I don't watch Project Runway (I refuse to provide a hyperlink).

I'm sure "jeggings" is part of their daily vocabulary - and wardrobe.

Part jeans, part "leggings". Just sweatpants. I'm sure at a greatly marked-up price too. ....that apparently do nothing but show your junk.

In a perfect world, that'd be enough to buy and wear them in public. It just seems like a horrible marketing ploy and I already get brow-beaten for wearing sweats to the grocery store at 07:00 when I am up and find out we have no milk. I'm not changing so the lady in the express aisle can see me in Dockers.

David provided an accompanying article to go with his email. Here it is. It's kind of funny, but you can see where it might have been a little better had he or I had anything to do with it. I'm just sayin'......

Of course, now that I think about it - I'm not sure why David sent this to me? What does it say about me? What does it say about what he thinks of me? Hmmmm.... I'll have to ponder this for a bit.

Ok....I'm done.

He just likes to push buttons. Mine. And that's ok. He does it with humour and he makes me laugh. And I now know what I'll be getting for the holidays! (psssst.....I prefer olive.)

Song by: Sparks

Friday, October 22, 2010

Fool on the Hill

Seriously, how fucked up are the Thomases - both Ginni and Clarence?

First, that wench expecting a 19 year old apology. But Clarence (not enough bells will ever ring to get his wings!) implied Anita Hill should also apologize during some autobiography he allegedly wrote.

...which by the way, why would you write your autobiography before your term in the Supreme Court was about 2/3 through and not like 9/10 complete? The man is all ego.....and nothing to back it up.

Here is what I want out of a Supreme Court justice - even a conservative one - one that actually talks and asks questions in court.

I don't know about 2010, but in a NYT article reported that Thomas had not asked a question from the bench in over - get this - four years!!!!

So he's letting all the other justices do the heavy lifting while he sits his fat ass on the bench and then makes decisions that affect certain individuals, presidential elections and national law??

And then he has the nerve to demand an apology from a woman, who not only told the truth, but did it under subpoena? Hill didn't even want to testify, so it's not like she had some huge vendetta against the man. And it's not like it even cost him the job - he still got it!

Of course, part of me - just a smidge - thinks Ginni has had it up to here with Clarence and is just fucking with him with her righter than Tea Party fund raising and this passive-aggressive call to Hill (seriously? Over the weekend and to her office??). Maybe she's trying to humiliate the man for something he's done and she's just tired of it.

Either way, they are loons. Both of 'em.

Song by: the Beatles

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Record of the Month - Classic

Another installment of a disk I have enjoyed over the years. I'm trying to keep the Record of the Month posts to be fairly new releases. Classics are going to be ones that are at least 5 years old.

I'm going for another '80's disk for my Classic post. I mean, do you really want me delving into the '70's? I mean, I can. I might.

While amazon says that the Cowboy Junkies' second album, the Trinity Sessions was released in 1990, it was actually released two years earlier.

The disk was recorded live entirely in a church, though I'm not sure it was an abandoned one. Don't get me wrong the 'live' part - there was no audience, just the band playing as one with no overdubs or studio trickery.

While their other albums (and there are many) are fleshed out, the Trinity Sessions is sparse, as you might imagine. Bordering on folk/country, but sliding into blues, at first listen there doesn't seem to be much variation from song to song - but really listen to it and you know that is not true.

Only about half of the songs are originals - mostly written by brother and sister Michael and Margo Timmins. The others are covers that, in theory, most people know or know of. Hank Williams ("I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry"), Patsy Cline ("Walkin' After Midnight"), Lou Reed ("Sweet Jane"), Rodgers & Hart ("Blue Moon") all make appearances.

Don't look for standard covers either - the Junkies do a great job at reinterpreting all.

Margo's alto is completely understated throughout the disk. Not monotone, not limited, no vocal theatrics and yet completely expressive. It is her stark vocal arrangements that really show her talent and the band is great at holding back on full-out playing. Nothing moves out of 4/4 timing.

If I smoked and drank scotch, this would be a great disk to sit and listen to in its entirety, in a dimly lit room where I could just absorb the experience. But I don't - drink scotch or smoke, that is.

It's what I call a great evening or night time record, perfect from start to finish - again, in its entirety. A gloomy rainy day is good for this too. It's not a sad album, just one of melancholy and reflection.

I'd call out the good songs, but there is no reason - all are good and the sequencing is well done.

I know they re-released the disk a few years back, but I haven't done anything to seek it out. I'm sure it's remastered, it probably has additional material. But I feel you don't fuck with perfection (or near perfection), so I'm not going near it. Why potentially ruin a great thing?

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Purple People

GLAAD is doing this thing today for folks to wear purple to, and I quote: show your support for the teens who took their lives because of anti-LGBT bullying.

As you know, I'm all for supporting the the stopping of bullying, but it seems to me that GLAAD could use someone to help them construct a proper sentence.

I don't really think wearing purple will do much of anything. It's like when (and maybe they still do it) for National Coming Out Day, to wear - get this - jeans (!!!) to support gay people. All of the sudden 83% of student at The Ohio State University seemingly happened to suddenly support gay folk coming out. Uhhhhhh-huhhhhhh!

In theory, if teens didn't want to be bullied, not wearing purple is probably a good start.

Hey - I'm just saying.

But I get that it is about you being you and not backing down to the jeers that insecure straight teens give off to those that are not just like them. Those straight guys are just dicks, and deep down they know it.

Me? I'm pretty comfortable wearing purple and I own a number of dress shirts in that colour, so I'm good. And at least this day, I'd say, gives me a reason to wear one, but I don't need a reason.

However, if you remember from months back, I had a few custom made shirts created for me - one being an eggplant colour with white pin stripes. It's such a nice shirt, I'm embarrassed to say I've been afraid to wear it, not because I'd be bullied, but because I think it's too nice. But today I am donning for the cause and for the blog.

Denton looked at me in the shirt this morning and said, 'you look like a French dandy......we'll you are a French dandy!' Who needs to go outdoors to get bullied?? Sheesh.

Anyway, you get the test shot of me in the shirt. The actual shots with it buttoned up - my face looked horrible. I do not recommend taking pictures right out of bed with puffy pillow face.

Song by: Tori Amos

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Shopping with Blobby

Yet another installment in the drudgery that is everyday shopping. The camera-phone makes it a bit more fun - though I get looks whenever I take pics of products. Like I care what people think!

Is it just me, or does this seem an odd way to try to get people to buy any food: conventional.
  • Indicates the usual method of production. Used in contrast to green or environmentally-friendly production methods.
  • Refers to standard agricultural practices widespread in the industry. Can include use of pesticides, synthetic fertilizers, "mono-cropping," antibiotics, hormones and other agribusiness approaches. Conventional farming in the US may also include the use of Genetically Modified Organisms.

Back in my day, we just called them 'apples'.

Maybe that's what the stores should just call them.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The Emperor's New Clothes

Oh, how I hate to shop.

As my friend Jon pointed out via the comment section the other day, I don't know chintz from Chinoiserie and I can't tell the difference between a Champagne from a prosecco.

I don't like frou-frou food. I do like sports. And I loathe having to shop - especially for clothes.

I'm a gay man, not gay-acting. Yeah - you can all shut your pie-holes.

Yesterday, between yard work, exercise and well, lunch, we went and did some shopping for clothes. Mostly bum-around clothes.....or as I call them, non-work clothes.

But even buying jeans, socks and underwear, to me is just a painful event. Like museum fatigue, I get store fatigue, but faster and a more acute case. g-d help us all whenever I have to get suits and dress shoes!

It was just the casual wear where we dropped way too much money. I guess not really. We just do not update wardrobe that much. We're kind of lesbianic that way. But I was in need of jeans and sweats. Winter's a-comin'.

But oy, I hate trying on jeans - as you can see in the above picture. I didn't even keep my old pair on. btw.....I do have briefs on, so I'm not nekkid under that flannel and t shirt.

I did have this very brief supernova of seemingly good luck with the first pair of jeans I put on: a 32" waist that fit! The rest of the jeans were "loose fit" and I didn't like the overall look. But I can't tell you how long it's been since 32" even remotely fit me. Over a decade for sure.

I remember back during the 1980 Winter Olympics reading the Eric Heiden's thighs were 29" wide. My then-scrawny waist wasn't yet 29", let alone my thighs. Oh, how times change.

I tried a more "regular cut:, and well, I could get into the 32" version and they looked good, but you know it wouldn't take much for them to be a wee bit too tight (probably one cookie), so I went to 34", which are just fine.

Still - 34" isn't bad. For me. Lately. A few years back, I had made it up to 37" at one point. I did make it to back down to 35" last year, but most places do not stock odd sized waist sizes. So I'm now down a little further and wouldn't mind getting down to a comfortable 32".

Of course, many clothes manufacturers now fib about the size of their clothing to make folks, like me, feel better about themselves and their purchases. Hell, I might still be a 37" waist, but I'm not about to take out a tape measure to find out. Ignorance is bliss, so they say. Let me have my moment.

The bottom line is I got a pair of jeans, two pairs of sweats and some new underwear before I called the little outing to be over, no new shirts be damned. It was less painful for me to go cut the lawn and do the laundry.

Now I don't need to go back to a store until, like, April!

Song by: Sinéad O'Connor

Sunday, October 17, 2010

You Are a Runner and I Am My Father's Son

I'm way proud of my friend Morty.

Oh, there are many reasons of course (one being that, it's now been 18 years, to the day, that he took me to the Emergency Department before my appendix ruptured), and it was his birthday yesterday.

I'm not sure we care all that much about birthdays, per se - but he attributes his life to his mother (and dad) and he shares a birthday with his mother. The date, not the year.....obviously.

His parents anniversary is on my birthday. They gave him life, Morty saved mine......blah blah's all very intertwined.

But I love the fact that today Morty is running his umpteenth marathon. While it is an incredible feet feat, it's not nearly as good as the 5k he ran yesterday......with his father.

It was his father's first 5k and get this.........he won his age group. Yes, it was the over 70 category, but who the frick cares about that? I love he actually ran and participated. I love he did it with his son. I absolutely love that he won.

I think it was a great birthday present, not only for Morty, but for his mother too.

Good luck in the marathon, Morty. Too bad your not a Kenyan.....or your father.

Song by: Wolf Parade

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Set the Fire to the Third Bar

I got talked into going to another G2H2 last night. I think I'm like 0 for 6 in having a great time at these things. Or even a good one.

It wasn't horrible, but it just seemed more of the same. Mostly clique-y kind of groups who don't really talk to anyone but themselves..........kind of like regular gay bars.

Once again, no taking over a straight bar. No, the sign on the door said 'closed for private party'.....completely keeping any straight people out and once again, giving gay bucks to a straight establishment who segregates us.

We're a proud people! {sarcasm!}

I love how the place had two TVs. One plaed Fox News. The other? NASCAR. Oh, how they know their audience. Shoot and SCORE! {sarcasm!}

I was abandoned shortly after going with a co-worker and was about to leave after finishing my one beer. And then a guy came over and introduced himself. ...not in a creepy way.

He was a nice guy. His name was Ahmed. He was alone, abandoned as well. He thought that neither of us should just be standing around. He was actually fun and funny to talk to. He then made me do one walk-around with him and thought we should talk to just anyone. I wasn't sure about that last part.

Ahmed mentioned to me that he was mid-eastern. He actually laughed when I blurted out in mock surprise: "Nooooooooo!" I guess it could have gone either way, but he got it.

Ahmed talked to a few folks and introduced me, whom I promptly forgot. Then we ran into my spin instructor, Andy. I guess that whole gay/not gay question has been answered.

He had way cool glasses on. He mentioned he liked mine and then I realized he's never seen me in glasses. I always wear contacts when I workout. Andy always wears glasses, but these were new and way cool.

We've never had a discussion on our outage, but now it is out there, so that is kind of cool. He's a nice guy.

One beer. One new introduction. One car ride home. This morning I spin.

Song by: Snow Patrol w/Martha Wainwright

Friday, October 15, 2010

Easy For You To Say

As thick skinned as you might think I am, sometimes I'm not quite as tough as I sometimes appear to be. No, sad but true.

I've told you about my sixth grade experience when someone scrawled 'FAG' on my desk and clearly others in the class knew about it.

Or maybe the time when my friend Jon and I were walking to our cars after a day at the OSU Medical Center and a car drove by and an occupant yelled, 'FAG!'. Jon laughed, mostly at me, because I assumed it was directed at me.

A year or so later, I was walking on OSU's campus to my new job, actually after having lunch with Jon and someone yelled out of their dorm window - in the dead of winter - 'FAG'.

I looked around and sure enough I was the only one out in the elements. My g-d, I was four stories below and had on a winter coat, and a hat. It's not like I was using $400 worth of Loafer Lighteners.

This one, I just turned to and flipped off. I kind of felt the change in me that day.

I was, and am, proud to have participated in the It Gets Better Project, even if I'm not 100% thrilled with my submission.

That being said, of my half-dozen video posts, it is the most viewed of any I have done. About 1500 viewings to date. That's almost triple the amount than my Jiggy Whore Dance-Off III I did for Brett Cajun. That only garnered a little over 532 hits and a second to last place showing in his rigged voting.

Back to my point.

My YouTube account is set to let me know when there are comments posted to any post and I've only gotten two. One of which was just weird (looking for some empathy, but if you clicked on his link could tell a not so true story) the other one was just very disappointing.

You've probably already guessed his contribution : "Fag''.

Sir John Gielgud popped into my head from his role in Arthur: "You obviously have a wonderful economy with words, Gloria. I look forward to your next syllable."

I also have 17 'likes', but of course it is the two 'dislikes' that troubles me. I should say that one of the thumbs-down came hours before the comment, so I'm not sure it's from the same person. Hey, I told you I wasn't as thick skinned as you imagined.

I'm not sure I care so much about this (other than I'm blogging about it), other than why would you be watching these videos in the first place?

Is this how displaced homophobia works, that some loser shut-in is commenting gay people's video posts? Better in their parent's basements than out on the streets, I guess - but that's probably not too far off.

I guess it's easier to hide this way. At least some of us try putting ourselves out there - right or wrong. This guy was just wrong.

...and speaking of wrong (or things that are irking me) regarding It Gets Better: straight celebrity posts.

Rob Thomas? Adam Levine (though it's only a 40% shot he's straight anyway)? Jewel (ok, maybe I went to far with the word 'celebrity')? that skank Ke$ha? ...the list goes on and on.

You know, they can certainly do the I Heard It Gets Better campaign, but I don't really think they can really speak to the gay youth of today from a first hand perspective.

It seems like shameless self-promotion to me in order to shore up some fan base that they have or want to have. Do today's gay teens even know who the fuck Jewel is? Or some guy from the Backstreet Boys, who became irrelevant right after these kids were born - if not before?

Maybe it's me, but they seem to be cheapening the idea of it all.

Song by: Linda Ronstadt

Thursday, October 14, 2010


I'm not an SNL watcher - not real time. It's way past my beddie-bye time. Oh - and it's usually JUST NOT FUNNY.

At best, I watch a Hulu clip or two and even then, it's only now and again.

So since Kristen Wiig is one of the only funny folks on that show, she usually does better than others in success percentage, like this political ad on Christine O'Donnell, tea-bagger candidate for Delaware. No doubt you've heard of her over the last few weeks.

No doubt you've seen this clip before you got to this blog. Hey! I had other things in the line-up so this is what you get today. It was this or Sesame Street's Grover doing his 'smell like a monster" clip - which is cute or French & Saunders doing a Bjork parody.

By the way, I love French & Saunders. Doing stuff way before and after AbFab. They do a great take on Shakespear's Sister video - if you a.) know who Shakespear's Sister is. b.) are familiar with their 'Stay' video.

But I'm going with SNL, but clearly I have given you some links to look up random videos.

Song by: Sarah Vaughn

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

12 of 12

So I'm doing my eighth 12 of 12. 12 pictures taken on the 12th of the month. Since I only post once per day, you get my images the following day. All pictures taken with my iPhone.

Created by Chad Darnell (thanks Chad!) and picked up from, what I can tell, a number of random bloggers who then link back to him and vice versa. He intends 2010 to be his final year of doing this, but hopefully someone will pick it up from there. Time will tell.

04:50. The Spo Shirt of Shirts ready to be shipped out.

05:15. Dry cleaning out for pick-up. It seems light out because the security sensor detected me and lit up the door like 10 suns.

05:25. The gym parking garage. Currently, me and one other person.

05:27. The lights outside the gym and the streetlights going down the street. I liked the way they looked. Ruckiry (not Jon's boss), the image came out.

08:15. Larry King and Nancy Grace bookmarks. They hang in my former bosses office. Apparently you can get them at Hudson News (you know the airport stores). Who knew CNN was marketing such stuff? I'm waiting for the Anderson Cooper one or at least Soledad O'Brien.

10:15. My mid-morning snack. Granny Smith apples are the only apples I find to be consistently good. As for the water, I drink about 120 ozs. a day.

15:30. Part of downtown Cleveland, from the 11th floor. You can see the Rock Hall and of course, the lake.....Erie that is.

16:55. Nahhhhh. It can't be the same guy.

17:20. Smoke stacks outside University Hospitals of Cleveland. I did one last month (or the month before), but I love the blue sky yesterday.

17:50. Spin Class. Yes, my second gym visit of the day. I was the first person there. Well, second, if you count the instructor. As it turns out, there only ended up being nine participants and four of them left three quarters of the way through. What's up with that??

19:20. I'm sure no one wanted to see my wart, but too late. Here it is. It didn't used to look so bad before the dermatologist butchered me and actually made it worse than it was. Invest in medicated strips/band-aids now, because it seems I'll be wearing one for life.

21:18. It's too bright for Sophie. But what I love is that if you look closely, she's sleeping with part of her tongue sticking out. She does that a lot and it is so frickin' cute!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

This Shirt

I've become part of Dr. Spo's Spo Shirt Charity.

Spo makes his own shirts, or the tropical kind anyway, and one is making the blog rounds for other bloggers to wear, record on via said blogs and then pass along. All in the name of charity.

Spo, or Michael, has the charities of choice being organizations for HIV/AIDS or Prostate Cancer, Doctors without Borders and the Humane Society. I'm a fan of all of those (I mean, I'm not a complete monster!), but of course, I really like the idea of the Humane Society or APL. I'm a big animal lover. And anyways, those doctors can go to Barnes & Noble if they don't have a Borders.

The shirt came to me mid-last week, but I was away on work travel as you may (or may not) have read. So it sat unattended for a few days. ....and I'm not sure I'm Spo Sized. He might have a smaller frame than myself. While it wasn't Jersey Shore tight (I'm guessing, I've never seen!), it was snug in some places and maybe not as long in the trunk as Blobby needs or likes.

While Denton certainly lives and sometimes reads my blog, I can't think of a time he's actually participated in it. I thought it important to show where the shirt has been - and not just at our house. Some kind of landmark in the city I am in seemed appropriate, so I dragged the man around for an afternoon to take a few snaps showing me in the shirt around Cleveland. You just can't do that with a self-timer....not well, anyways.

I don't know if anyone else is planning on doing it at some kind of familiar spot, but I think it a good idea.This is not my project or anything, so I certainly cannot dictate, just suggest.

Without further ado.......I present to you the Spo Shirt of Shirts in Cleveland, OH. (you can always click to enlarge if you choose. I take no responsibility for burned or damaged retinas. I've checked with my lawyers on this.)

Me & Shirt @ the Rock and Roll Hall o'Fame. Or the JFK Library. Or the Louvre. I.M. Pei is a one-note architect....if you axe me. Since Springsteen probably doesn't have an exhibit at either of the last two places, we'll go with that I'm at the Rock Hall.

Blobby and the Shirt in Voinovich Park - behind the Rock Hall on the left and the Great Lakes Science Center on your right. The skyline (or part of) is behind me and the buildings. The structure seemingly coming out of my head is the former BP Building. The middle one is the Key Tower (as in Key Bank) and the one right next to it is Terminal Tower.

Still in Voinovich Park with the Shirt with the steamship, the William G. Mather. Browns Stadium is behind it. Years ago, the Mather was on the other side of the Rock Hall, and it was there I lay naked (well, me and 2500 people) at sunrise on the cold cement for a Spencer Tunick installation. Since we were naked, there were no shirts - Spo ones, or otherwise.

The Shirt & Blobby at the Free Stamp by Claes Oldenburg. I love this sculpture. Not everyone did back in the day when it was installed. Blobby is not everyone!

And because the other pictures did not have me "smiling" - and I'd take shit from it at least from one certain blogger (and she knows who she is!) if I didn't at least attempt one, here is a jowly Blobby against the city skyline again. Still the Key and Terminal Towers in the background. Now you can see the f'ugly Justice Center too.

The shirt gets sent out today to John over at I Got Something to Say. It would have been sent out yesterday, but there was no mail delivery. Like me, he'll be out of town when the shirt arrives, but he'll get to it. Maybe he can take picture in front of the Old North Church or with his cutie of a dog, Scooter!

Song by: Mary Chapin Carpenter

Monday, October 11, 2010

Are You Out There?

Today is National Coming Out Day.

I almost forgot and now it's going to throw off all my postings for the entire week. Normally I don't have my posts planned this way, but things kind of fell into place where I could take care of my blogging by beginning of the week. Ahhh....the best laid plans.

It wouldn't be troublesome if I didn't stick to my one post per day rule. ....but I do.

This is a story in three segments. Three coming out stories that really span the scope of what it is or can be like. The first one I think I've mentioned before, but not everyone is old to this blog and don't go through the archives.

I was having my Christmas in July party and my then-friend Ann was in town. We'd known each other for eons but I never truly had come out to her. But push had come to shove since everyone on their way over was gay or knew I was. I had to tell her and this was after a few people had showed up.

We went to the kitchen and I told her. She had a priceless but sincere comment: "Are you gay because you don't think women find you attractive?" My comment was just priceless and less sincere: "Ann, men don't find me attractive!"

A friend walked in at that moment and spit out his beer. While Ann and I kept in touch for a while after that, she never truly understood and it really affected our friendship. I haven't talked to her in almost 14 years at this point.

Since we've known each other since 6th grade, it is unfortunate, but it was really over other things in her life, not who I was, that terminated the friendship.

One of my friends came out to his parents when he was 16 or 17. They promptly kicked him out of the house.

I'd say it was a sad story (and it is), but he flourished beyond belief. I am always so proud of him.
While keeping contact with his sisters, as far as I know, he has seen his parents once in 30+ years and that was recently. At a gathering for one of his sisters, his parents were there and he was also in attendance with his partner. His parents did not recognize him - at first. Why would they? In 30 years, he was a stranger to them.

When they realized who they were shaking hands with, they turned and walked away.

That totally amazes me, but clearly what they saw as a betrayal was still there for them. Personally, I just think they assholes who don't deserve to know their son. I do believe some folks can never be educated and as tough as it is, ties must be cut.

He is a well educated (Ivy League - without their help, thank you!) and daring man. I've known him for over 25 years and absolutely love him. ...and no, it's not Denton. I love his resilience and daring for life. As hard as it is to believe, the rejection of his parents might be one of the best things that could have happened to him.

Friend's Son
One of my other friends has a son who came out to him at the age of 15.

I totally found that brave. I was never like that. No one my age seemed to be that 'out' at that age. Said friend has been understanding and supportive of his son. much as he can be.

He won't lie to me, but clearly doesn't fully understand everything, but they talk constantly (the son is now in college) and visits are frequent - both ways.

It's been nice for me, since my friend will ask me certain questions on development of gay teen to adult. I can only give my life experience, but in some ways I've quelled his fears that his son is not out of the norm for his track in life (it's not a choice) and at that age. In a way, you think he'd be farther along coming out so early to his entire family, but he's right on schedule....if there is a schedule.

And my friend? He takes some delight when others start talking badly about gays. He will gladly chime up and tell them that his son is gay. It usually stops the chatter immediately. Whether it begins to have these folks think differently is yet to be seen.

I'm actually really proud of both of them.

It's not easy to come out, but it does get easier. I almost relish the time I know I will have to tell someone that I'm gay, and can see them coming down the pike and about to ask me about my 'wife' or if I have kids.

You don't always get the desired results you want, but you know, maybe those people are just not meant to be in your life and I can almost always assure you that it will make you a better and stronger person.

Song by: Dar Williams

Sunday, October 10, 2010


October 10, 2010.


Just wait until 10 am; 10 minutes; 10 seconds. People will go nuts. Well some people. Not me.

So, what else is going on? Oh - if you haven't had your coffee this morning, I have something here to get your heart rate up: an article in the NYT on Anne Coulter. I don't do caffeine, so......

My next door neighbor sent it to me. Not to myself and then to Denton, just to me. I wasn't sure what to do with it. Much of it has to do with Ann appearing at Homocon 2010. But she goes on to say that “Everybody wants a gay neighbor”.

I'm sure it's because we're all so neat and keep up our houses and yards so well.

So I sent him an email back saying, "is that why you sent me the email?" He thought that was great.

Of course, we were out doing yard work too. We were keeping things neat and tidy when this fella showed up:

He was the friendliest feline I have ever encountered. Tons of rubs and purrs. Very confident and not skittish at all. He seemed well fed and we figured it was not from just mice, birds and chipmunks.

Yes, it is a he. Though we didn't know that immediately.

We played with him for a while and then I went in and, as the administrator of our neighborhood email group, sent out a message with these pictures.

Apparently, he is a new neighbors cat who didn't have his new tags on. His name is......wait for it.......Debit Reynolds. It had been Debbie Reynolds (ummmmmm........ok.......) until they found out it was a male cat. The neighbor said he knew his way home and she apologized that he was bothering us.

As if! Had he not had a home or stuck around, he'd be ours by now.

So that's life on 10.10.10.

Song by: Mark Goldenberg

Saturday, October 09, 2010

Try Not to Breathe

No worries Mr. Stipe, I don't have to try at all. It's just not happening.

Well it is, as clearly since I'm alive and writing this, but now you can call me Mr. Mouth Breather.

We only had Benadryl in the house, so Thursday night I took it, but it's not a decongestant. It did dry out my mouth and eyeballs, but only a little of my nose.

Last night I had the fiancé bring home something to break up the snot. He stopped by the drugstore on the way home and got me some pseudoephedrine.

As Edna Turnblad (the real one, not the John Ravolta one) says: "It's the times, they are a-changing, something's blowing in the fetch me my diet pills."

Poor Denton had to show his driver's license and sign some papers to get it. Because as most some of you know, sudafed is a key ingredient when making methamphetamine......which we're totally not doing! Though two middle-aged white men would probably be the perfect cover for running a lab, who has the time? I did very poorly in chemistry anyways.

I'm not saying I have ever done meth or not, but I do like to follow Dr. Leo Spaceman's line of questioning if ever consider it: "how important is tooth retention to you?".

Pretty important.

As it is, the cold is now seemingly moving towards the chest. Yay! But that is the progression of things, no? It will be a night or two of coughing when I'm horizontal, keeping Denton and the neighbors up - and they live quite aways away.....and the windows are closed.

No gym for me today. I can't do it....physically or to infect anyone else (that's what movie theatres are for). I've been outdoors walking. It's kind of a different routine and I like it.

Well, gotta go take some meth......ummmm....I mean sudafed.

Song by: R.E.M

Friday, October 08, 2010

Under the Weather

I'm sure I'll get back with the program in a day or two. I just got one big ole stuffy head.

The sore throat was just the pre part of my head cold. It probably wasn't even my throat but my ears and the pain just radiated down to the throat.

It's now centered directly in the sinus cavities. But hey, the throat is no longer sore. However, the pressurized cabins of the airplane were not pressurized enough. Oh, the pain.

I've been gone all week and now I'm home, and from there is where I'll be working today.

Blech. Blech. Blech.

Maybe this means my cold came early this year. It usually arrives in January, so perhaps I'm ahead of the curve. I'm not sure this is a good thing.....but it's here.

It'd be nice to redo my video from the other day, my voice sounds great! Very low and manly.

Song by: KT Turnstall

Thursday, October 07, 2010

No Title. No Nothing.

Sorry - it's work. It's health. It's a no real post Thursday.

Big project is due TODAY. And I'm at an off-site work thing that doesn't seem to care about that. And my sore throat has gone into a mild head cold. Can't imagine why my immune defenses are down with this stress.

I get home later tonite (yayy!) so hopefully a better post for you tomorrow.

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Let Me Roll It

I'm in Chicago working day and night. I've done nothing fun. Nothing. Regardless of what the above image might imply.

USELESS meetings all day, when I have some real heavy-duty deadlines that add up to the tens of millions of dollars, but no one seems to care that much. And then last night I was forced to go out bowling.

It's not so much that I hate bowling. I don't. I'm not a bowler though - make no mistake.

And what a fucking competitive team I had. Way too much high-fiving for my liking, though two would be one too many. Really, after each frame from each of the five of us?

...or as a co-worker said to me: "all that testosterone.....and then there's you!".

I'd have argued, but it would have come out high-pitched and nellie, so I just nodded knowingly.

I'm tired. I've got tons to do - and you know what? I've got a sore throat, and I'm going to bed. I'm sure I'll be up at 04:30...I'll look at that shit then.

Oh - and I totally missed my parent's 54th anniversary. I guess I'll call them tomorrow.

Song by: Paul McCartney & Wings

Tuesday, October 05, 2010

I Melt with You

We finally made it into Melt Bar & Grilled.

No, you wouldn't think getting into a place that makes frickin' grilled cheese sammiches would be such a big deal. However, over the last two years we've been to either of their two locations to be told of a two-hour (!!!!) wait. Danke Nein.

This last weekend we took a chance and went. They said a 15 minute wait, so we stayed. 15 became 30, which became 40. Even at that 'short' period of time - totally not worth the hype that either the local press or the number of spots they've garnered on FoodTV.

I know I'm an old fart, but it wasn't the place for us....and yes, I'm speaking for the both of us.

Sure, my ear is pierced but my eyes, nose, mouth, cheek, chin and forehead is not. This is true of the help and the clientele. Don't even get me started on the ear lobe extenders - ones the size of the circumference of the bottom of drinking glasses. Seriously dudes - are you even thinking past the age of 24? It looks like Goldie Hawn's abdomen in Death Becomes Her.

We were clearly in the minority.

And I know anymore I'm in the minority when it comes to tattoos. Not that if I found the right image, I wouldn't do it. But we're not talking a tramp stamp tatt at this place.

Let's just say the guy at the table next to us was one of the more subtle people with an ink job in the place. The big pistol tatt'd on his neck that was aimed right at the back of his ear was a nice touch. So were the two tatts of bullet holes on the back of his hands - one of which had 666 next to it. Classy!

Oh, if you get a Melt tattoo (yes, a tatt of a grilled cheese) you get something like 15% off for life. So.Not.Happening.

I'm also ok with just a plain grilled cheese sandwich. But of course, that's not really what they deal with. You can see the menu here. Each concoction and its attached caloric content is worth about four weeks of gym visits. ....and it's really not worth it.

Don't get me wrong, it was ok and all, but will I be going back? I can't see how or why. We'd never catch a break like that in timing again and there wasn't much on the menu I'd splurge on (again, the calories) with any regularity. ...or irregularity.

I can make a more palatable grilled cheese sandwich at home.

Song by: Modern English

Monday, October 04, 2010

It's Getting Better All the Time

A few people, on the side, have asked that I do a vlog entry for Dan Savage's It Gets Better campaign. The project is targeted to gay teens who are plagued by bullying and thoughts or acts of suicide.

It's not that I didn't want to do it, but I just wasn't sure what I could contribute of that would be of any substance. I finally set those concerns aside and sat down this last weekend and made a few attempts - mainly because the time with Photo Booth kept running out.

No agenda (well, kind of). No script. And a little trial and error.

But I did it. I'm not 100% thrilled with the final product, but it is probably as good as it was ever going to get, and in truth, I'm never going to be thrilled with me on video.

It's a good project and I encourage anyone with the means to participate on their blog or to post on YouTube.....or both.

Song by: the Beatles

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Mood Swinging Man

I am Mr. KrankyPants today. And part of yesterday.

Maybe it was the 24 hours of continual rain. Maybe it is the fact I'll be gone most of this upcoming week. Maybe it's because I've got a major work deadline looming during the week I have to (yes, have to) travel.

Most likely it's the culmination of these things.

I'm not really in the mood to blog. I'm not in the mood to do much. I know I should log into work email (yes, on a Sunday) to see what atrocities await me. I cannot wrap my head around that right now.

And I still have my EDL stuff to do. And my sister-in-law and daughter are coming to stay with us of the afternoon and night, so I gotta snap out of it. I just do not know how.

I hate being me.

Song by: the Finn Brothers

Saturday, October 02, 2010


It is hard to believe that it is October already.

We're 10 months into the year already. How the fuck did that happen? It all goes by so quickly.

I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.

I'm 22 months into a blog entry per day. One day I had two ! I'm 10 months into my job and in that time I've taken two days off. Two.

How the fuck did that happen??

I seriously need a week off, but like I've said in earlier posts, that isn't happening until maybe the last week of this month. Maybe not until November. Ugh.

It is the month of birthdays. Many of my friends have their big day this month. It's also Halloween, and while we never get the kids, I already have posts planned in my head. Yayy you.

I do love the weather though. Slightly cooler. Less humid. Lovely colours. But it does signal winter, which I have come to loathe.

I am the administrator for our 'hood listserve/email thingy hoo-ha. Someone asked me to send out a message for snow plow services. Ugh....I'm not ready for that. The same week, we had our snow blower taken in for servicing so it is up and running for the snow - which in theory, could start this month. October. Snow.

the Farmer's Almanac says: Winter will be colder than normal, with the coldest periods in late December, mid- and late January, and mid- and late February. Snowfall and precipitation will be near or slightly above normal in New York and below normal elsewhere. The snowiest periods will be in mid-December, January, and mid-February.

I really don't care about how much snow we do or don't get. I'm not thrilled with the colder than normal shit. But maybe 'colder than normal' isn't the same as 'colder than last year' - which was almost unbearable last year and went on for frickin ever.

One shouldn't get ahead of oneself though. I shouldn't live in Winter any sooner than I have to.
I'll just shut up now.

Song by: a-ha

Friday, October 01, 2010

Deep Space

Have you looked up in the sky early in the morning lately?

By early, I'm talking around 05:00 or maybe a little later, but not much.

One or the brightest objects in the sky is up there and it ain't a star. Nope, it's the International Space Station. How cool is that?

I'm always intrigued by that kind of stuff anyways, so it's the equivalent of showing me a bright shiny object to distract me from well.........everything. It doesn't take much - but you've probably figured that out about me a long time ago. Adult ADHD isn't so bad.

When the Hale-Bopp comet appeared back in '97, I would stand outside for hours just watching it. Sure it was moving moving moving, but down here where Kang and Kodos visit now and again, it just looked like it was hanging in the night sky for a week or so.

...and I didn't even own Nike running shoes or have a purple shroud. I will cop to drinking vodka sans the cyanide.

I don't really hang out in the morning to watch the space station, but I gaze up at it when I walk to the gym. Even yesterday morning, you could see a dull light through the cloud cover. You can't and won't mistake it for a star, it is way too bright and it's not really moving like a plane, so you won't be fooled by that either.

Of course, you might not be interested at all. It might just be me who is the dork here. No need to respond to that one.

But if by chance you've got the urge, here is where you can find it. Unlike the diagram, you don't really need a protractor or T-square to figure out where it is. Really - just look up and around till you see it. It's usually out west - at least from where I am.

Song by: Rickie Lee Jones