Friday, March 30, 2007

Office View

Ok, technically it's not MY office view. But it is from a small conference room,opposite side of my office. I can see Lake Erie from my desk, but it looks east - not west. (click image to make bigger.)

This is actually a northwest view.

For those who might not know - the orange thingy is just Cleveland Stadium. That's what it's called. It has to be one of the few (if not the only) stadiums that doesn't have a corporate name. I find it to be a HUGE waste of money. It was built less than 10 yrs ago, but with no retractable dome. In a town where we get snow starting in October and it can keep going through May. And no one uses it but the Cleveland Browns. Eight times a year!!!! maybe two exhibition games. We don't have post-season play because the team sucks canal water, as my cross-country coach used to say. My indignation probably doesn't help that I couldn't give a crap about pro-football.

At least at the old Cleveland Stadium, they used to also have the Indians and some rock concerts. I did go to a World Series of Rock where I was oh so drunk and high. I'll try to remember who it was 1978. Fleetwood Mac, The Cars, Eddie Money & Todd Rundgren. Not in that order. I'm sure the Cars one knew them back then. It was an all day event.

One of my cousins works in the smaller black building in the foreground. I'm not close to many of my cousins - but he's a good guy and we are going to try to have lunch once a month or so. We'll see.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Happy Birfday

I'm bad at birthday cards. Just horrible. I've got my PDA that could tell me a week in advance of someone's birthday and I still don't use it like that. I think I've utilized every half-decent eCard in the past few years as my last minute catch-alls, but it is just not socially acceptable anymore.

And actual birthday cards themselves are usually so crappy - it's embarrassing to buy one. One really must look high and low for a good one. My favourite in the last few years was from a line of Backstreet Boys cards - it said: Have a Kevinly Birthday. Stephanie was the recipient of that one. She either didn't think it was funny or just didn't get the joke. I've never acknowledged her birthday since.'s my friend Jon's birthday today. He's like 109 years old or something.


I'd say he's my oldest friend, but that is in length of years I've known him. 22. Actually the "oldest" title belongs to York....but don't tell him that. I've actually known David a few months longer than Jon. ...but I digress.

Jon and I bonded when we both worked at OSU Hospitals back in the Paleolithic Era. On a rare night when he could get out, we went to a place in German Village. We didn't know each other that well, but we sat at the bar drinking beer. And there was live entertainment, a guitarist/singer.

This performer was second only to when I was in Monterey and the solo bar guitarist opened his set with The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. OPENED with it! I was in tears I was laughing so hard. Sadly, no one else found it funny.

But this night the guy was just playing stuff that we weren't really paying attention to....until he played Piano Man.....on a guitar. At the same time, Jon and I must have heard the song, looked at each other and without saying a word burst out laughing. It was a lifetime friendship forged at that moment. Again, no one else in the place gave it a second thought.

We've had about 200,000 of those moments since. His former fag hag, Barb (see, I was nice there) said we were ' know you guys think alike.' Ruckiry (not his boss), we've also found a group of friends who operate on a very similar level. He's a great guy and a great friend - for being so old, that is.

The picture isn't that recent, but it is one of us from Becky's wedding umpteen hundred years ago. Or six and a half. I was rounding up. Jon still looks this great....and I think I'm not quite as jowely.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

I'm really not happy about my blog.

I am not talking about the writing. I'm not talking about the visitors. I'm talking about the change.

For months I've been trying to switch over from Blogger to WordPress. First there was an exporting problem which I could not seem to overcome. Ruckiry (not Jon's boss) I had months off where I could take my sweet fucking time to copy/paste each and every single entry to the new format.

I picked a new template. I made categories. I got the frickin' archieves back!!! I double posted everything so it was up to date. The new look is clean, it's neat and I really like it. ...and yet there it sits.....unactivated.

WordPress isn't great at redirecting a site like Blogger can do. That is its one big flaw. I can't seem to find a way to do this. Denton thought he did last night. In one iteration he got it to go with no pictures - frick! Then they were there but without my URL, which is paid-up for the next two years. And the really odd thing is - each time I tried to pull up my URL on my laptop, I got the old Blogger version. What's up with that???

I tried Safari. I tried Mozilla. I did not try IE. Still it came up with the old I sat and watched Denton pull up the new one on his laptop.

To not screw too much up with my blog, we put the old version back on and will try try again.

I just want it to be over.

If anyone has lived through this - I'd willingly take some advice.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

You Better Work

Oh RuPaul - you have an insightful comment for everything!

For those who aren't aware, my partner was downsized last July. I was much more upset about it than he was. For him, it was a great relief. He likened it jumping a sinking ship. Not like a the recent events that has everyone plunging from Carnival Cruises.

In reality, he was pushed - but I got the idea: he didn't go down with a disaster that was the company he worked for. Going to a start-up was risky, but together we agreed it would be good for him to do something daring and new. And in the months preceding his end-date, we discussed if he should even stay since we both knew the venture was struggling financially.

What we didn't see coming was a month and a half later the outplacement of my position in an organization I had been with for 11 years.

The original plan was for me to keep up his spirits while he did a job search. Now it was more of a see-saw thing - or could have been. It's been a tough eight months - but it could have been so much harder.

Me finally getting a job, while he was still looking, could have been bad, as men has much more fragile egos than we ever care to let on. But we really rose above it and he could not have been happier for me. Yes, I took a substantial pay-cut when I didn't have to, but the work/life balance is leaps and bounds better than anything I could have imagined. In retrospect, being let go to take my new position was probably the best thing that could have happened. But that's easy to say now.

Now it is his turn. Layed-off a mere eight weeks or so before I was, he'll now start a new position a mere eight weeks after I started mine. Neither job is where we thought we'd be. It's a completely new direction for both of us. But things come together and for the better.

We're excited and thrilled - not (only) because of the jobs, but due to where we are, how we got here and from what we are now capable of going....together.

..and for the record, one Mr. David G chastised me for being a dark cloud back at the first of the year - but he was the first person to say to me: "geeeze, isn't there anything wrong with your new job?" Who's the dark cloud now?????

a companion piece has been cross-posted to Gay Men Rule.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Cuts You Up

Is it any wonder I'm not straight?

I loathe to shop (unless it's electronics). I don't garden. I'm not a great cook. I wouldn't keep a Cher song on for, say, more than 2.3 seconds...and that's if my reactions are slow.

Let's face it - except for my liking to have sex with men, they'd kick me out of 'the club' altogether. ...and somewhere in upstate New York, my sister just blanched.

Now imagine my pseudo-shame when Rebecca was so appalled at our lack of matching flatware that after the holidays a few months ago, she actually sent us a set from Amazon. It's true. We've mixed and matched pieces from about 3-4 different sets - and we still didn't have enough.

Normally, gay couples would be flocking to Crate & Barrel to fix this post-haste. We never cared that much. We cared - but not enough to make a career out of finding the right set. We'd look. We'd discuss. We'd leave.

Becky kind of forced our hand. The set she sent was 'ok'. She said if we didn't like it to exchange it for something we would - so there were are again, at step one. To be honest, I didn't really like it. What we didn't realize until later was, what she ordered and was on the slip was not what Amazon sent. Phew! She didn't have bad taste after all.

But Amazon was out of what she did select. And if you start looking at their site, MANY people are shipped the wrong flatware than what was ordered. The stuff we did like has been back-ordered forever....or 3 months...with no sign of coming in. We went to another choice.

We also got it over the weekend. We like it - and we seem very grown-up....for men in their 40s.

But please, look at this Amazon review of the product? I wish I could make this stuff up, but I can't. And less you believe me, feel free to go here and see that it is indeed posted as such. Clearly the man (?) is off his anti-psychotic meds. (click to make image/review bigger.) I could not stop laughing at this.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

I've Changed My Mind

I've never really been pro-death penalty. I've never been pro-bible. But for those who are, are usually contradictory with the two. Though Shalt Not Kill or Eye for an Eye. Which is it? Well, it's usually which is most convenient. Abortion versus War. Abortion versus a convicted murderer.

It seems that the religious right only deems the sixth commandment necessary when it comes to embryos and sperm/egg hook-ups. And timing.

During the 2000 election season, Becky asked me about my thoughts on the death penalty. I'm usually against it. I was questioned on the 'usually' part. I don't think that lethal injection does anything to deter crime. I don't think criminals think that way. And I think there is too much of an error factor in our justice system to begin with.

Anyway, my 'usually' comment originated from a story of a man who forced someone to drink drain cleaner at gun point. Personally, I would rather he had just shot me.....but that's me. But the person died from the drain cleaner. In reality, the way that person died is not better or worse than what others have gone through - it just seemed at the time so harsh.

Here is where I'm fully for the death penalty: people who kill or torture pets. While working out the other day - all of the channels on the gym's televisions had news stations on. All were rife with pet food poisoning and the beheading and gift wrapping of a dog's head that was delivered to the little girl who owned him. My iPod was in so luckily I couldn't hear anything, but it was almost impossible to escape the images.

I don't know and I'm not implying that the rat poison in the pet chows were intentional. Clearly the dog beheading was.

FUCKING FREAK! Same with those who toss or burn kittens and what have you. For this kind of shit - I am ALL for the death penalty.

I'd be happy to plunge the syringe in myself.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

I'm #1 ???

Laurie Anderson did a piece in the movie Home of the Brave regarding popularity and binary numbers. I'll paraphrase: she says that there is only room for one number one and nobody wants to be a zero. The problem is, there is very little room for the rest of us.

It's funny 'cause it's true.

I was never the popular one. Not growing up and definitely not in school - when it seemingly mattered most. You want and even need to be accepted. I had friends, but like all kid's relationships, it was conditional. I guess that's true with adulthood, but most of us (not all!) are better equipped to shrug it off. We grow thicker skin. We become stronger. We become smarter. We find a subset of our cohort that likes us for us.

With that, I've been fairly lucky. I have some really good friends whom I keep close. Then there is even the peripheral friendly folks who I see time to time, but don't touch base with on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis.

One of 'those' people sent me an email yesterday that spurred this post - and made me laugh. It is an on-line quiz to test on how cool you were in high school - what crowd you ran with, etc. The test says it's pretty accurate - and I probably can't discount it in the slightest. Test yourself out if you dare.

Friday, March 23, 2007

The Art of Flight

I do love Washington DC. I always have.

Not so much for the politics - though to a degree it is intriguing. Not even for the history, necessarily. Though both those things kind of tie into it all.

There is something about watching, from just about any angle in the city, planes flying overhead. Barely overhead. Seeing these graceful silver birds low on the skyline, looking like they are barely missing the top of the Jefferson or Lincoln Memorials as they start to land at Reagan National Airport (I refuse to call it by that name!).

It is never a scary feeling. It always just seems so natural to me. Ditto when you see an army helicopter flying over the ellipse. Maybe it's Marine One - maybe not. I always assume it is. I can watch that shit all day long. I used to love going to see airplanes take off and land when I was younger....back when airports had observation decks. I don't think those still exist.

It's not nearly as fun being IN the planes. People in those planes make the art of flying mundane, pedestrian and just downright ungraceful. Take the guy who got on late and there was no room in the overhead, but he made room by smashing my laptop and suit coat. The same guy who sat next to me who was Blackberrying as we were rushing down the runway at take-off, even though portable electronic devices were to be turned off a long time before - and after two warnings from the flight attendant to him specifically. The same guy who immediately fell asleep upon take-off and spread his legs faster and farther then the high school slut under the bleachers - pushing against my leg in a creepy icky kind of way for the hour and ten minute flight. The person who has no regard for anyone but himself.

I never want to be that guy.

Thursday, March 22, 2007


As if the literary competition wasn't tough enough...

Love Walked In goes softbound and is currently Borders' Book Club Selection of the Month. Our Borders even has autographed copies!! oooohhh.

When The Reason We're Here comes out (or is it Looking Up at Stars?) comes out this fall, I will expect more than a scrawl of an author's name on the jacket cover! It will be personalized.

Oh - and I'll actually read that title (again). I haven't even read, let alone purchased Marisa's book.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Ridin' The Rails

Listen people -

If I am going to travel to the DC region and have to go to McLean, VA for some of my biggest clients, I don't wanna sit in traffic all day long. The gridlock around the beltway is a frickin' nightmare. I have no desire to rent a car on those days and travel there - and there is no other way to get there without a kirjillion dollar cab ride.

I would also rather not stay in McLean. I'm not sure I want all my travel meals to be Chili's and TGIFridays. But you have so little choice. Chain resturant or nothing. But the closest Metro station is West Falls Church and still a $14 cab ride to the frickin sites I go to.

But here is what I did notice while I was there this week! I saw big signs posted all over Tyson's Corners for bringing a tunnel out to Tyson. I'm begging you to go sign the petition.

I'm not fool enough to think that this extension of the Metro will be done by the time I'm done with this company - even if I work there for 10 yrs and they start building the line today. But talk about some place that desperately needs it.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Four Years Old

Blobby's Blog turns 4 years old today. Oh, I'm sorry - 48 mos old. He's still a toddler.

I'm sure there are many who would qualify me at being stunted at the 4 year old level...but hopefully the blog is coming along better than my own personal development.

Yes, I started this on the eve of the Iraq War - and my thoughts on it. It has gone from poorly written entries, to absolutely silly ones, to inactivity then to more consistently and hopefully better written.

Until I was updating the new look (yes! I know it's not up and running yet. Still trying to figure out how to export it), I had no idea how my blog entries broke down in terms of themes or categories. Granted these are self-identified topics, but Politics seems to be the outstanding winner. Music, Humour, Work, Friends and Uncategorized are the next biggest, though possibly not in that order.

It is not the funniest blog out there. It is not the most political blog out there. It certainly isn't the deepest blog in existence. But I hope you enjoy it anyway. At first it was a lark - but I am really enjoying writing it.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Site of the Month

I cannot even tell you when I've found my own site of the month. I've been dependent and at the mercy of friends to help identify what eventually becomes my monthly pick. I even have a few that are in holding pattern just waiting for a new month to arrive.

Believe it or don't - but the site of the month isn't about nekkid girly mudflaps (is that one word?). Well kind of. This is the new nekkid girly mudflaps. Something for the rest of us:

Nutsacks. And why not have yours hanging from your vehicle?

It is amazing how many sites there are selling these. Ok...I know of two. But who knew there were that many? I guess I don't have the vision for product development and marketing.

Naturally you can get them in flesh colour - but there are also brass balls and blue balls. There are also camo ones with a 'support the troops' ribbon on them. Trust me, if I'm supporting the troops and the military and balls are involved - I can find a better way to show my appreciation.

I do believe my favourite is this one: It's not enough to just do this with a sense of humour. Isn't one of the ideal of the GOP is to have less government and to stay out of public lives???

...ok....when you get done laughing over that'll get another chuckle to know that at least one politico finds these decorations to be 'a serious problem'. Is it because the terrorists have bigger balls than we do?

...btw...Denton gets the shout-out for the sites and the Post article.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Should I Vote for Mitt??????

The questions are dumb and indicative of nothing. SHOCK!

I mean, they don't even axe me if I drive a Volvo, read the New York Times or enjoy the arts!


You Are 56% Democrat

You aren't a full fledged Democrat yet, but it's likely the party that fits you best.
You probably consider yourself an independent Democrat. You usually support the party, but you also think for yourself!

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Long Duck Dong

"No more yanky my wanky - the Donger need food!"

It's really not a Sixteen Candles post, but I just love that line.

It probably distresses Morty and Andrew (not Becky's Andrew, but David's Andrew) to know that I just do not care for Chipotle. There - I said it. In general, I like mexican food, but it doesn't really like me. Do I have to draw you a picture?

It goes a step further with Chipotle. I don't even like it. So I guess the feeling it mutual. Honestly, I've tried it a number of times and different menu items at that, but it is still a no-go for me.

Morty will tell you that he has a Chipotle addiction. He is not the only person I've heard that from. Many others seemingly need their burrito fix. This is good news for Andrew. I'm just not one of them. Sorry Duck.

That being said, Duck makes a brief appearance in this amateurish video AP thing. This is nothing against Duck - but what does it say when he is so much more well spoken than the host, whom you know has a broadcast journalism degree.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Time Goes By.......So Slowly

As g-d is my witness, Madonna's "Hung Up" came up on the iPod after 30 minutes on the recumbent bike and 20 minutes into my elliptical routine. And it was going slowly......I don't know what to do. (Morty - that's the lyric of the case you didn't know.)

It was a good workout, but time on the bike does just seem to fly for me. Not so much on the treadmill and slower yet on the elliptical.

I've been pretty good about going to the gym since getting my membership last week. I do an hour each time and try two different machines every visit. All legs and cardio so far. Nothing upper least just yet. Every once in a while as I am on the treadmill and they're all sitting side by side, I just want to jump into the OK GO routine (see pic).

I know I'm just getting started, but it is fun to watch others in the gym while I workout. Since I go pretty much the same time, you seem the same cast of characters: the older guy who runs the treadmill like a fiend. The lady who gets there 20 minutes after me and leaves 20 minutes before I'm even done. The guy with the pierced everything (!) who also has the biggest set of wings tattooed on his back (well, I assume since I've never seen wings tattooed on anyone before).

Then there was a new guy today: handsome in an odd way. Great nose (what can I say?). The 'odd way' was how he carried himself. If he did anything but the elliptical I didn't see it. And he did it right in front of a TV. And I mean RIGHT in front of it. His face maybe a foot from the screen. And he must have flipped through every channel before starting his routine. Remote in hand, he just stood, then flipped and watched TV about 15 minutes before even getting on the elliptical.

Oh - and the showers. UGH. The 'body wash' in the jumbo pump containers? I'm assuming it's just Prell shampoo. Or Calgon dishwashing detergent. Don't even get my started on the lotion. Do I really have to be a huge fag and bring my own 'product' to the gym?

...and yes....the question is rhetorical.

Thursday, March 15, 2007


I figured I'd do a monthly 'what I'm listening to' kind of thing. This could be viewed as a lame placeholder kind of post. And probably it is. But it's my blog! So there!

These may or may not be newly released disks. They might not even be a good disk - just what is been in heavy rotation in my car (as usually the iPod is playing anywhere else).

I’ve loved Lucinda Williams for well over the fifteen years that I’ve known her music. I know Car Wheels on a Gravel Road is widely considered to be her best disk. I like it a lot – but for me, Essence leads the pack of her work.

Williams’ new disk, West, is leaps and bounds better than her last studio disk, World Without Tears. Where the latter disk had some good stuff on it, the sub-standard stuff was BAD. At least on West, it might not all be good or great, but there is no bad material. Ok. Maybe one song. Unfortunately the bad song is the lead one. It’s repetitive and just downright boring. It is the only song I use the ‘skip’ button on. The next song is the second weakest, but I let it play through.

After that the disk just gets good. No highlights are clumped together and some take repeated listenings to be deemed highlights. But to be fair, I find that true of most music I like and you can probably see this recurring theme in many of my Record of the Month entries.

The stand-out cuts include: “Where is My Love” (great subtle guitar), “Unsuffer Me” (great subtle strings….and a great title, if I say so myself), “What If”, "Rescue" and "Wrap My Head Around It".

From a vocal and songwriting perspective, Williams doesn’t differ that much from her previous efforts – but the production by Hal Willmer might be the difference. As alluded too above, it is the subtle nuances of the songs and arrangements that make the disk better than her last.

Admittedly, after World Without Tears, I didn’t run right out on day one and buy or download this disk, and I am not a fan of the 30 second snippets you get at iTunes (they always feature a bad part of the song). Finally my curiosity got the better of me and I dove in and got the disk without really hearing a single note. Risky? Sure. But this time it was well worth it.

iTunes and sell the digital or actual disk for under $10. How can you really go wrong?

Wednesday, March 14, 2007


It's Pi Day.

That's right - 3.14. And becuase I work with a bunch of techno geeks, we're having pi(e) at 1:59p.

Get it? 3.14159!!!

I'm sorry, but I love it. This would never happen at my old place of employment.

Glenn is getting a little stiff today - you just know it! But today is the 301th birthday of the symbol we typically use to represent PI (π).

The first use of the symbol π to represent the ratio of the circumference to the diameter is given in Synopsis Palmariorum Mathseos by the Welsh mathematician William Jones (1675-1749) in 1706. It was probably inspired by the greek word for circumference: περιϕερια (peripheria). Later and progressively, this notation was popularized in his publications by the Swiss Leonhard Euler (1707-1783).

π is less formally known as Archimedes' constant (based on his early estimations on the number) or Ludolph's number (for his work in deriving the first 35 digits in the late 1500s).

Also Albert Einstein was born on 3-14. And if you haven't heard it, Kate Bush has a song on her last album got it..."Pi". There is no other artist I can think of who can sing about π and actually make it work.

In case your interested: Here are the first few digits of PI: 3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971 6939937510 5820974944 5923078164 0628620899 8628034825 3421170679 8214808651 3282306647 0938446095 5058223172 5359408128 4811174502 8410270193 8521105559 6446229489 5493038196 4428810975 6659334461 2847564823 3786783165 2712019091 4564856692 3460348610 4543266482 1339360726 0249141273 7245870066 0631558817 4881520920 9628292540 9171536436 7892590360 0113305305 4882046652 1384146951 9415116094 3305727036 5759591953 0921861173 8193261179 3105118548 0744623799 6274956735 1885752724 8912279381 8301194912 9833673362 4406566430 8602139494 6395224737 1907021798 6094370277 0539217176 2931767523 8467481846 7669405132 0005681271 4526356082 7785771342 7577896091 7363717872 1468440901 2249534301 4654958537 1050792279 6892589235 4201995611 2129021960 8640344181 5981362977 4771309960 5187072113 4999999837 2978049951 0597317328 1609631859 5024459455 3469083026 4252230825 3344685035 2619311881 7101000313 7838752886 5875332083 8142061717 7669147303 5982534904 2875546873 1159562863 8823537875 9375195778 1857780532 1712268066 1300192787 6611195909 2164201989 3809525720 1065485863 2788659361 5338182796 8230301952 0353018529 6899577362 2599413891 2497217752 8347913151 5574857242 4541506959 5082953311 6861727855 8890750983 8175463746 4939319255 0604009277 0167113900 9848824012 8583616035 6370766010 4710181942 9555961989 4676783744 9448255379 7747268471 0404753464 6208046684 2590694912 9331367702 8989152104 7521620569 6602405803 8150193511 2533824300 3558764024 7496473263 9141992726 0426992279 6782354781 6360093417 2164121992 4586315030 2861829745 5570674983 8505494588 5869269956 9092721079 7509302955 3211653449 8720275596 0236480665 4991198818 3479775356 6369807426 5425278625 5181841757 4672890977 7727938000 8164706001 6145249192 1732172147 7235014144 1973568548 1613611573 5255213347 5741849468 4385233239 0739414333 4547762416 8625189835 6948556209 9219222184 2725502542 5688767179 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Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.

They say in ironic celebrity deaths, that Keith Richards will die of natural causes.

He scares me. Clowns have nothing on this guy in the scare department. NOTHING.

That being said - he was about the sanest and most normal thing about the Rock and Roll Induction ceremonies last night. I couldn't watch....not for more than say 45 seconds at a time.

As Eileen Flowers would say: AWFUL!

I never even got to see Patti Smith or REM. I love when folks like Ronnie Spector say shit like 'my songs' 'my group'. my my my my. Honey - it wasn't all YOU. And then there's Van Halen - as if anyone still gives a shit.

But does Keith have a mirror that doesn't crack each time he passes by?

Unfinished Business

and i am nothing of a builder
but here i dreamt i was an architect
and i built this balustrade
to keep you home, to keep you safe
from the outside world

...or so sing the Decemberists.

The dreams just keep getting weirder and weirder. I wasn’t planning on this being a ‘dream blog’ – so unless I have other really strange/interesting dreams, I will try to refrain from posting here.

I titled the post the only way I know how according to the dream. I looked for a common factor and this seemed to be the only one. Well, at least it made sense at five in the morning.

It started out with me and others at a golf course, setting out to play. The foursome ahead of us consisted of Dave Foley from Kids in the Hall and Phil Hartman. I wasn’t sure if David Spade was in my foursome or whether he was just the starter. Technically, with David Spade in this, it might qualify as a nightmare.

Never once in the dream did I hit a golf ball. Never once did I have an opportunity to. The ground was sopping. I couldn’t get a tee to even sit properly in the ground, or get a ball to sit on the tee. The tee and ball would bend and rotate never allowing me to even square up to attempt to hit.

Jump to a kitchen somewhere. The set-up was like my mother’s but it wasn’t hers. Only two people in the kitchen besides myself: Rebecca and Jeff Redmond. Jeff whom I used to date. Jeff who, when breaking up with me, told me it was because he never saw me doing anything with my life career-wise. The same Jeff, who (allegedly) was sent to prison from stealing from his place of employment. (Jeff – if you’re Goooooogling yourself and come across this entry: blow me!....and not in that good kind of way.)

Anyhoo – Jeff and Becky were discussing some computer program that could replicate 3-D maps of Ohio State’s campus. They were specifically talking about Park-Stradley Halls – which is where I lived (Park) my freshmen year. Oh, they were doing the dishes at the time of this conversation. At this point I carried in Sophie – to which they both oohed and ahhed over her (as they should!).

.The last part of the dream now had Becky, Jeff and a walk-on by David Spade. I was still attempting to golf down a residential street that was in my parent’s neighborhood. Still, I had no actual contact with a golf ball. At some point Becky calls over a neighborhood dog who just loves loves loves her. Kisses for Rebecca!!!!

Next, we’re all in the backseat of a car (well…not Mr. Spade) and Becky is talking to Jeff about her novel. I rub in the fact to Jeff that there is a character somewhat based on me. Then Becky and I start talking about her new novel – which actually had a title! (sorry Becca – for the life of me I don’t remember what it was.) That was the dream.

I should make clear that I have NO unfinished business with Mr. Redmond. None. Well, he never did return my copy of Love in the Time of Cholera – but it certainly isn’t worth reopening that relationship for something I can get at a bookstore for $11.95.

The book title – Becky might tell you, is unfinished business. Not necessarily the second novel title….but that’s her cross to bear. The golf – in dreamland, obviously is unfinished since I never got one hit. But as for golf overall, I’ve been done with that game for almost a decade. The game hates me and the feeling is mutual. I’ve played since I was 8 and oddly enough, I’m no better than the day I started.

Is it any wonder I haven’t had a restful night of sleep in years?

Monday, March 12, 2007


My friend Kris has started her own blog. I've known Kris since she was a graduate student at Ohio State, oh back in.....1993? She's fun. She's funny. She has provided a number of links and thoughts that have become my blog entries. I suppose that well has now run dry as she will be using those for her own postings.

Oh, she also has a nice husband and they have a new daughter.

Kris is a good writer and it's fun to see her putting it out there for others to see. She's only a few days into this, so be kind. I'm glad to see she put up the ability to post comments. At first she didn't want to, but I think it's a good thing.

I am being lame and not blogrolling here here. I vow to get this site switched over (where she is already linked). With the new job, I just have really put it on the back burner, but it is ready to go. Honest.

Oh, I also posted today on Gay Men Rule.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

More Dreams

Last night it was me in NYC. I kept going to ATMs to get cash. But the increment was always $185. Remember the days when ATMs did (or could) dispense in units of 5? Maybe you're all too young.

So at one point I stick in the bank card and punch in $185 and the machine opens up and dumps a huge roll of $0.39 stamps into my hands and then closes back up. Ruckiry (not Jon's boss), I snagged the bank receipt. And yes, this morning I did the math and $0.39 doesn't even go into $185 evenly - so either I got a deal or the USPS was ripping me off!

A nice looking Nordic man noticed my predicament and told me where the nearest post office was. I immediately went over there and cut in front of everyone in line. The woman at the front of the line, while looking haggard, was pretty nice about me cutting in front of her.

I guess this is how I knew it was a dream. Who the fuck is ever nice at the post office - customers or workers?

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Cruisin' USA

Yes, I know you're thinking because of the title that this is going to be some kind of sex post - but you'd be wrong.

Cruisin' USA is a full-on arcade game, where players sit in a car seat and via video game, race from west coast to east, if you have have enough quarters or are a good enough driver to win free turns.

The first time I played this was at Jillian's Pool Hall. Slusser (that bastard owes me twenty bucks) and his then partner, Tom Q were in town. I don't know why and don't even remember if they stayed with us. I do remember ending up at Jillians, shooting pool, drinking beer and then Slusser got me to go 'drive'. I was horrible - probably because I was drunk. But the motion of the game made me queasy too.

Eventually, I got over that. Not during their visit, but with the multiple multiple times, per week, that I would go out drinking with my boss. We started driving drunk. A dollar at a time. Being a creature of habit, I'd always pick the same car and eventually knew the roads from the hills of San Francisco, through the redwoods and Chicago, that I'd eventually end up in DC partying in a hot tub on top of the White House with Bill Clinton. I kid you not - that is how the game ended if you won. Oh - and there were lots of scantily clad women in said hot tub.

But our lives change: Cruisin' USA games were eventually replaced by Cruisin' the World - which wasn't nearly as fun. My boss was fired. And I wasn't going out anymore - or at least to that degree. It's been years since I've played this game.

Imagine my surprise last night when my dream was about this. Over and over and over. The dreams wasn't as animated and I was following (or losing to?) Denton's BMW which was in the distance in front of me. I drove over a repeating loop of road that went through Hartford.

Now I've only been to Hartford proper twice. But on one trip, five years ago, I killed a day by walking a lot. It was a main road that went through downtown and up through some scary neighborhoods to Trinity College. Somewhere I had to pass a statue of Casimir Pulaski. This was all in the dream. Including a car crash and a police officer who was directing traffic around it.

I thought exercise was supposed to make you sleep better.

Friday, March 09, 2007

Ohhhh.....a Gime!

Man oh man - I started at the gime yesterday. It was an OK start. Nothing outstanding. I am trying really hard to keep expectations low on track. I always have a habit of going in with grandiose ideals and falling way short.

The plan was to do a half hour on the Life Cycle and another half hour on the treadmill. I only got the first part done. My legs were a little jelly-y when I was done. Granted I pushed myself pretty hard. On my real bike, I do about 13 miles per hour. I was averaging 22. I'm not sure if I was doing 'better' in the gym because there were others around or it wasn't in the showiness of nature.

One thing I have to remember to do is to put my towel over the Life Cycle display. It distracts me beyond belief. I don't need or want to see how much longer I have to go in my ride. Or if a hill is coming up, or how many miles I've gone and calories I've burned. I just need to plug in the iPod and do my thing.

Tomorrow I'll just do the treadmill. Then the elliptical. Eventually I will work my way up to weights and such. These guys I work with are into the boot camp training and core strength training. I am so not there. Certainly not in front of other - and others I know and have to see daily. There is a class called 'gentle yoga'. I might have to check it out.

I did forget how much I hate the locker room. Oddly enough I don't mind changing back into my work clothes or showering in front of others (oh, don't get all dirty on me and I have nothing to be ashamed know.....down there) - but for whatever reason changing into my workout clothes is odd to me. I'll assume this uncomfortableness will pass.

I need to and want to keep up with it. I just have to get over the fact that no one really cares what I'm doing there. I can't let it be like aerobics back when Morty and I did it eons funny as that all ended.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

The Two Towers

Not unlike Lisa Douglas, I just adore a penthouse view. Or at least a cityscape. I like bustling downtowns, but more so, I like the buildings. As you approach, most cities look great. Up close, usually not so much. Driving into Cleveland every once in awhile makes me think of driving into Chicago, though on a smaller scale.

Chicago continues to add new and cool architecture. Cleveland has kind of stalled in this area…about fifteen years ago. As I look out the 25th floor window in front of my desk, sometimes the city just looks sad. It still reeks of the industrial revolution. More figuratively than literally. Thankfully.

On a clear day I can see three immediate power plants that run along the shoreline. Further up the northcoast, on a very clear day, in the very far distance, you can see the two cooling towers of the Perry nuclear facility.

Right or wrong, the design of these towers captivates me. Not just Perry, but any of them that I see. Maybe it is a holdover from the forever engrained images of Three Mile Island. While traveling through Pennsylvania you can see before hitting the Delaware Water Gap – possibly off the Susquehanna River. You can see them for miles on the worst day. They tower above the treeline and depending on how the highway weaves. They are to the east of you, then to the north, then to the west. They aren’t the North Star.

Don’t get me wrong – I am not a fan of nuclear power. I’m no C. Montgomery Burns (yes, he has a wikipedia entry, but I'm not using it!). As a matter of fact in 10th grade we were required to do a persuasive speech. Mine was taking the position against nuclear power. I admit to not being the best orator, but I thought I did fairly well. Unfortunately, my fellow students voted on if they were persuaded. They were not.

A week after the speech, The China Syndrome came out. We were in 10th grade. No one gave a shit about a Jane Fonda / Michael Douglas movie. Probably the same as today. A week after that, Three Mile Island happened. Naturally, everyone in my class was now against nuclear power. Fuck them.

I think it's time for me to start some traveling. This transition period of me not knowing enough at work leaves my mind to wander.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007


Yet another installment in the drudgery that is everyday shopping. The camera-phone makes it a bit more fun - though I get looks whenever I take pics of products. Like I care what people think!

I remember back in the early '80s when I was a member of Local 880, packing grocery bags, loading cars and restocking shelves. One day I answered the store phone and someone was asking if we had Pigs Feet. I put them on hold and went up and down the aisles looking. And lo and behold, we at Kresse's Bi-Rite stocked this shit stuff.

I swear I had been gone for 10 minutes looking for this item, but the guy was still on the line. I get back on the horn and say 'yes, we have pigs feet' and I got the response, "so how do you put on shoes?" Laughter. CLICK!

Damn! I'd been had!

Prank phone calls were my speciality. Not only did I never see it coming, I never heard of that one either!

Ironically, stocked them next to Prince Albert in a can!!!!!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Everyone is Talking About the Weather

....but no one ever does anything about it!!!!

You can't really tell that easiry ('s not a typo) , but the top picture is from my office window just yesterday: a complete white-out.

Shortly after I got to the office it started raining. Then sleeting. Then snowing. All with in 10 minutes. 10 minutes after that, limited visibility.

Below that is the same shot is from less than a half-hour later.

Tonite, while pumping gas, I swear I was colder than I had ever been. Granted, I wasn't dressed for it. When you go from garage to parking garage, to attached office building, one dresses slightly differently. A hat and gloves would have helped a bit. But still! Sub-zero in March? This is bullshit!

But you know what they say: If you don't like the weather wait five minutes. Or twenty, in this case.
I do hope that the weather warms up a bit before I start traveling in less than two weeks.

Monday, March 05, 2007


There is no one more deserving of that moniker than Ann Coulter. ...though she revels in it.

Though it's been all over the internet the last few days I have yet to hear or see any major media report Ann Coulter calling John Edwards a 'faggot'. She did it while on C-Span and with major GOP presidential candidates in attendance.

Not one person called her on it. Not one.

Sure, after the fact they are alllllllll appalled. But why should she stop if they don't have the balls to say something right then and there and make her answer for herself? That is how bullies operate. ..and it is how wusses respond...or don't, as the case may be.

But the truly sad thing is that I expect it from Cunter. There is no surprise or shock value with her anymore. It is Mitt, Rudy and McCain who are the biggest losers here (besides their constituents, that is). Why should we ever vote for them if they aren't big enough men to denounce her on the spot??

Naturally they all condemn her for it after - because their advisers told them to, but why not then? Dare they upset the base of the GOP which it was said in front of?

I'm kind of shocked that Rudy would even agree to be at an event with her after her remarks on the 9/11 widows. September 11th is what he's building his entire campaign on - isn't he?

Sunday, March 04, 2007

Caught Up in the Rapture

Years ago I wanted to be clever with my answering machine messages. It was Easter and I was coming in from a long long long night of drinking, but before passing out hitting the sheets, I recorded the message: "Unlike Jesus, I have yet to rise - so please leave a message". It got some good responses from that.

Now James Cameron and co. are telling us, or at the very least, implying that Jesus was not resurrected in physical body.

I don't necessarily believe in Jesus Christ as my personal saviour. I don't think the point here is if I do or not. I do love (sarcasm) that his followers are so certain in their beliefs that even the possibility of what Cameron's produced show implies is ludicrous and blasphemy. That big novel, The Bible, tells them so. It must be true. ....and these are the folks who believe an apple was just an apple in Genesis. Not the Genesis of Abacab fame, but as in 'the book of...'

Let's take this back a bit - shall we? Most people of Jesus' time, allegedly, never thought him to be THE messiah. They thought he was nuts. They thought he was blasphemous. He had a smallish set of followers who believed in him - yet they pretty much watched him die.

Certain people of today claim they are the second coming of the lord. People think they're nuts and think these "messiahs" are blasphemous. Many have a smallish set of followers who believed in them - and yet pretty much watched them die. Jim Jones. David Koresh. The Hale-Bopp comet guy. Charles Manson.

Because you know that Mildred, from Our Lady Will Pet Your Squirrels, will just know the 2nd coming when she sees it. Just like all of those folks 2000 years ago knew the first coming - right?

I'm not saying that Cameron's show is on the mark, or even near it. However, I can at least open myself up to this possibility. But the thought of church leaders and followers who denounce the vaguest possibility makes me laugh. These are the same folks who believe in virgin births, walking on water, water to wine and fish and loaves, yet cannot fathom the thought of Christ not physically being resurrecting couldn't possibly be true. Mind you - they believe it for everyone else who dies who believes in Jesus.

I won't say how I know, but Discovery, who is airing the show, has been preparing for protests, picketing and yes, bomb threats.

Because if Jesus existed and were here, he'd be preaching to blow up people.

Saturday, March 03, 2007


I really wasn't planning on making this a work blog, but since I hadn't had a job in five months it gives me bunches of new material. But I will try to limit it. Bare with me. Hopefully on my travels I will have amusing anecdotes to relay, though I don't start traveling for two more weeks.

I did complete my first week though yesterday. I can't say it was an exciting week. You know how those first ones go: trying to find your way around, trying to learn what exactly your responsibilities are, and trying to coordinate with your boss who is still picking up the slack and too far in over his head to assist in a transition - even though his intentions are honourable.

But the company seems so positive. Great outlook and good camaraderie. All the things my last employer thought they had, but really only had entitlement which they took to the nth degree.

Yesterday, we celebrated a win. It was one of the things the CEO and I talked about during my interview. He said they don't do it enough. He might have taken that conversation to heart. So we had lunch yesterday - Mexican. Everyone participated. I brought in my salsa. Technically it's Dan Curry's salsa, but I haven't seen the man for 12-13 years and I took out his cilantro ingredient, so I'm calling it 'my salsa'.

It was nice just sitting around in our lunch area - which btw, has a massive Viking stove and subzero fridge units. Not too shabby.

After work though was the fun. Bowling. You heard me right. Bowling. Actually it wasn't after work - it was during work. We closed down at 3:30 (4:15p for me, due to a conference call) and went to a new hip bowling alley. The kind that have neon pins, coloured balls, R.E.M. (ugh, and Cher) playing over the P.A. system.

I had not been bowling in maybe 15-18 years. I think we took Jon to a Lane Avenue alley for his birthday. My goal this time was to break 100. It was not meant to be. I got a number of strikes and a few spares. Those were off-set by the one pin frames though. Sad sad sad.

The good news was, it was a great bonding experience. No one cared that anyone was bad at the game. Everyone had fun. About 35 of the 60 office staff participated. Oh! Budweiser makes beer bottles shaped like bowling pins. Did you know that? At one point those were the only pins I was knocking down......if you know what I mean. I do have to say, my hands are still stinging from all the high fives that went around each time anyone got a strike.

But here are some things I did learn during week one:
  • I have showered six out of the last seven days. Five of them in a row!!!! When unemployed - that is not a necessity. Smell ME!
  • Working the last five months on nothing but a Mac laptop, one forgets how to use a PC. Honest to g-d, I sat there going...' to I "copy" again?'. It was sad and funny.
  • I learned my boss is gay. I thought he was only particular, but it turns out that is just a trait of being a homosexual. I should know. His gold wedding band threw me, but it's true: gay.
  • I learned I was really wanted there. The two people who had openings both wanted me. I don't know how I ended up with the person I did. I kind of care, but not really. I doubt I'll ever ask.
  • I learned rush hour (on the way to work) sucks. I know, it's all new to me and it's more new nerves and anticipation than anything. My last job commute was 3-4 minutes door to door. This one has gone from 13 - 50 minutes depending on the day. The ride home is never longer than 12 minutes. Somehow there is no evening rush hour. Maybe they're all bowling.

Friday, March 02, 2007

...let me hear your body talk....your body talk

Along with the new job comes a corporate membership to an attached health club. It's not the best looking club, and not unlike we've both seen better days, but hell it's only $10/month. Oh - and on day one, the job provided me with a work out bag, t-shirt and gym shorts. They really want me to be healthier. But to be fair, I work in the healthcare field, so it kinda makes sense.

But working out is one of those non-resolutions I had for this year. I love riding my bike, but this is north east Ohio, so the season is finite. And the bike doesn't really work the upper body.

The odd thing about working out near/at your place of employment is doing it with people you work with. At some point you're going to run into them. Do I want them to see me in shorts - or worse, the shower? Do I want to see them?

It gets odder. The majority of my co-workers use the facility and actually make a concerted efforts to work out together. Yoga. Pilates. Core training. 45 minute Boot Camp. They do it all. They are encouraging me to join them - and you know what, I probably will.

Listen, I can be shamed and peer pressured into a better body. I'm not better than that.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

In Like a Lamb

Scratch that. Lion. Well right this second it is very lamby. First clear sky in a week. Heading towards 50!!!!! But predicitions for thunderstorms and flood warnings the rest of the day.

Tomorrow? Dropping 25 degrees and snow.

I am sooooo ready for this to be over. I just want some decent (not even great) weather.