This week, I have the potential for jury duty, though we are now two days in without the need for me.
They have needed me on a jury, I mean, I haven't even been called. I call the night before to see if they need me the next day. So far, it's a big fat goose egg.
Honestly, I'm torn. I feel so many times juries get it wrong. So do lawyers and judges. I'm sure if I were there, I could correct injustices and make the world a better place.
But on the other hand.........I don't wanna.
I have been beckoned thrice for this. Once in 2009, where I was never needed to come down to not get selected for a trial. The second time was in the height of Covid. They weren't even having trials, yet they were still sending out summons to be a juror. I got excused for that one too.
You know what they say - third time is a charm. If that were true, JLow (not a typo) would still be with her third husband. But Friday, I did not get on the list for Monday. Nor Monday for Tuesday.
That said, they're creeping closer to my number. I fear - yes fear! - I'll be headed to the justice center for Wednesday - Friday.
I don't mind being on a trial. I just don't think a lawyer on either side wants someone even halfway educated. The justice system preys on the uninformed and railroads far far too many people. So while I don't think I'll be selected, I do think I'll have to sit there for days to not get selected.
And worse, if I do, you just know I'll have to poop in the middle of some great testimony and have to sit there and clench before I finally have to throw up my hands and yell at the judge, "I'm out of order? YOU'RE out of order! The whole system is out of order", just so I can go pooh.
Actually, I know a way no one would pick me. I have some covid masks that say "Black Lives Matter". Most defense attorneys would want me. Zero prosecutors would.
That said, it would be absolutely horrible to wear that mask and co-opt and entire community just for self-gain. So I shan't wear it. I could put it on after I get seated and watch people crap their pants.
More pooh references.
For Monday, my 'draw' number was nowhere near close to who they requested show up. For Tuesday it was a lot closer. Perhaps. will be there later this week.
Just to be out of the office for 2-3 days, this seems worth it. I'll probably get excused when / if they ask if you have family member who are in law enforcement.
If nothing else, it could make for an interesting post or two, no?
Song by: Marianne Faithful
Soon to be Forperson of the Jury could be your email signature this week. I had jury duty while in Law School. An interesting experience.
I would love to serve on a jury but I am rejected every time.
Better in the jury than in the dock.
If you are selected you should show up wearing a BLM mask and a MAGA hat.
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