Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Cuts Like a Knife*

Let's just say there was an incident yesterday at dinner. 

I've made no secret of my love of pasta, and we were having a salad and tortellini for dinner. I've also made no bones about it:  pasta is nothing more than a cheese delivery system. 

If a waiter is going have me say "when" when he / she / they / them is grating parm, then they're going to wait longer at my table than they had at others. 

I don't think the other customers like parm less than I, it's just they're nicer about it and don't want to seem inconsiderate. 

That is not me. 

Last night, I was my own waiter, so I have no one to blame but myself.  Usually, 710 will grate the cheese for both of us, but somehow things got out of order and we did our own.  Luckily, for him, I went last. 

I was only 3 or 5 passes over the grater, with a brand new hunk of Parmesan, when it slipped, or I did. 
R-A-K-E my thumb knuckle right over quiet a few of the pointy thingies. 

I may have yelled an expletive.  Poor Shep was a bit out of sorts at that.  Honestly, it was hard to tell, on the grater, where the cheese ended and the skin began. Both were nicely shredded. 

At first, it didn't bleed, but I still washed it, neosporen-ed it and put a band-aid on it. But by the time I made it back eight feet to the table, blood already soaked through the bandage. 


I mean, I had to go back to eating and technically, I wasn't done putting the amount of cheese desired on my tortellini, but you know, I just opted to do with what I had. 

Yes, there was probably some of Blobby on my pasta, but what was I gonna do - throw it all out? 

Don't go all "ewwwww" on me either. Most of you watch the Walking Dead or Game of Thrones and see far more vile things than imagining me eating a little skin - and possibly, not even probably. 

Naturally, it is right on the knuckle of my dominant hand, so every time I bend it, I'm guessing the cut will re-break. Yay me!

My takeaway?  It's not my knees, hip or feet - so I'm good!

*'like' one. but not one

Song by: Bryan Adams


Travel said...

Ouch! Been there done that.

Old Lurker said...

Between this and the dog bite this has not been a good month for your hand.

Anonymous said...

I still have a scar from a grater incident 30 years ago.

Anonymous said...

That does it! You are not allowed to handle anything sharper than a spoon until July 1st.

Will Jay

James Dwight Williamson said...

I like to grate , cheese is much easier than skin