That's How I Knew This Story Would Break My Heart

I didn't say it then, but in my last 12 of 12, the picture of Petey and myself was his last. Well, the second to last.



I'll give you a second on that.




Yes, I'm afraid to say the end came for our beloved friend. A week ago actually. The day I took that picture. His very last picture is for 710 and myself only.

I'm as sorry to have to tell you as you are to hear it.

I'm assuming the reaction most of you have is saddened, but not surprised. That is ok, as it seems to be the general reaction of the few people we have even gotten the gumption to tell. I have found there is no easy way to say it. Not easy way to break it. And not accurate way to put it.

I've caught myself saying "we put him down"......but it makes me think of someone shooting a horse who is lame. I'm finding there is no good way to phrase it.

I love 710, but in certain ways, Petey was my heart. He was the best of everything. Loving everyone. Kind to all. The nicest eyes. The softest ears and tongue. I loved him from the day my sister brought him home. He always had a special place in my heart - and always will. I've said it before, of all the dogs my sister has had - and I've loved them all - none was even close to Petey-love.

No doubt, the last few moths have been rough for all of us - Petey included. He struggled and we with him. We did whatever we could for him. We stayed up all night with him if needed and were happy to do it. He saw the vet more than any dog should have to endure that trip - and he did it with grace.

While it was the right time and the right thing to do, it's never easy. I was strong......and then I was not.

I never understood the appeal of Peanuts....and for that matter, Snoopy specifically. I never got the fighter pilot or bird-friend thing either. I always thought he was kind of a dick. And I think he kind of is, unless you just see still shots of him.

In theory I knew Snoopy was a beagle, but I never really saw him that way, or knew what it meant, until we had Petey. Then Snoopy {kind of} became endearing. Charles Schultz must have had one in order to draw one with the mannerisms of the breed.

You won't be surprised to hear how much we miss him. It's been a week and we have not adapted. I expect him underfoot in the kitchen. I still plan my morning and getting home so I can make sure he gets out. I swear I hear him snort and sneeze when I'm up in bed.

I think it will be some time before we do find a sense of a new normal - and that's ok. 710 said aptly a few days afterward, "I feel I need to take care of someone". I know what he meant. It seems that we've been always looking after him - his needs, regardless of his health.

Someone at work this last week mistakenly asked me, innocently enough, if we had a dog. I had to fight back tears. And there's nothing like telling an almost stranger why you reacted that way - making them feel shitty in the process.

Overall, people have been great (though it sucked having to tell my sister) to us over the news. I can no longer ever ever ever make fun of Mike (see? no XXS). He, Peter and Otis were amazing. Everyone has been.

In the end, the vet was great. We went to our normal practice and saw a new vet. And the one vet tech who LOVED LOVED LOVED Petey, had another vet tech take her place, as she couldn't bare (bear?) to be there at the end. And actually, new everyone was probably the best case scenario. Dr. Smith adored Petey, as did Karen. As emotional as we were, the added tears would have been too much for me.

It was all very peaceful. I told him I loved him and thanked him for just being him. If heaven exists, he will be there waiting for me. This I know. I mean, unless he's on the scent of something better, but we'll catch up.

I suspect there will be one last Petey Porn. Probably next week. Just glimpse of pictures of his life. And ours. But mostly his. It could be a lengthy post.

I am thanking all of you in advance of your thoughts, so don't be too put off if I don't answer individually. Going from previous comments, I know you enjoyed the ride as much as we did.

Song by: Aimee Mann

Nada

You know, it's just one of those days.

Nothing coming my way. Nothing going my way. Work. Work. Work.

I'm not complaining. I'm just yakking.

Sometimes there isn't anything to actually say. I certainly cannot do another political blog. I won't give He Who Must Not Be Named anymore bandwidth for a while. He gets enough of that from everywhere else.

Today will prove to be a busy day. And why not, it was a busy week. But I have the weekend to look forward to. I'm in need of that. Still, more on that next week.

You're free to go about your day now.


Song by: Ricky Martin

I Told You So

I'm not saying I'm Nostradamus........or Ms. Cleo, for that matter, but..........

you might want to go re-read my blog post from yesterday.




Song by: New Order

I Predict a Riot

When Cleveburgh got the 2016 GOP convention, I groaned. Why would I want the likes of Matt Drudge, Ann Coulter and probable nominee, Jeb Bush roaming around our town - - I thought back in 2014.

Then about a month ago, I thought - - of fuck, this shit storm will be fun. I figured there'd be a coup for the nomination and it would be anarchy.

Now?

Well....now I'm just hoping the city doesn't go up in flames. Literally.

What the fuck is wrong that almost every single (t)Rump rally ends in violence. Or begins in violence. And during......in violence.

The media covers it, of course, yet no one does a fucking thing about it - law enforcement, the GOP or (t)Rump himself. He's for it, actually. And even {allegedly} paying the legal fees of a guy who sucker-punched at black guy at a rally (though he denies saying it, even though it's on video...which is a total Palin move). And security / police tackled and restrained the black guy who was hit. The white assaulter just walked away - only to be arrested after video came out showing the cops did nothing.

I mean, I shouldn't even be writing this. Donny wants to change the libel laws so if anyone writes anything bad about him, he can sue and win. Because right now, he can't win, so naturally he wants to make things go his way.

What a fucking cry-baby. He better hope he never gets to the Oval Office......I mean, how dare anyone say anything pseudo-libelous about the President?   {yes, I'm totally making fun of Donny himself, with his constant attacks on Obama's citizenship.}

Still, the convention.

What a shit storm this is going to be. We had once considered renting out our house and leaving town. Now with the imbeciles who inhabit the GOP - which are totally different that their usual imbeciles - our house would be trashed with them blaming us for letting them stay there. And on some fucked-up level, they'd probably win.

With all this violence, how is Cleveland going to get out of this convention without a riot.....or three? Chicago 1968 is going to seem like a cakewalk compared to what is coming.

Weeks ago, I smirked at the Cleveland Police Department requesting armored and riot gear for this White Supremacy Shindig, but it is clear they are going to need it and so much more. Whatever strides Cleveland has made in the last 7-8 years has been thwarted by the Tamir Rice shooting (regardless on which side you come down on that), the Michael Brelo case (regardless of which side you come down on that) and the upcoming GOP convention.

Hate will spill out into the streets. The improvements we've made to the city will be shattered and burned. Literally.

I don't even know why the fuck there is a traditional convention. Just do away with it and have a cage match and a mixed martial arts ring. I mean, this is the level at which we have arrived.

People can make all the comparisons they want to Hitler and Trump - and some of them are indeed valid. But Hitler took years to get to where he wanted to go. Trump has taken only months. Think about that. Hilter was a novice compared to this putz.

If you are truly not afraid - - you fucking should be.

I am.



Song by: Kaiser Chiefs

the Child is Gone

Deep down, I knew it was coming. It was only a matter of time and opportunity.

My nephew, Matt, whom I have tried to model (somewhat) after myself, has up and left home.

He graduated college last May and has been floating around doing a few jobs for his father and working at a local political campaign office for some such state rep. Neither of those thrilled him - though he seemed like a natural to take over his father's business.

Still, Matt longed for new adventures and well, hell, he's 23. That's what your 20s are for.

I love the kid - yes, he's still a kid - and he has big dreams even if his bank account doesn't equal those dreams. Boston was his first choice, but his interviews there did not work out. That's a shame, as I love the town and it would have made it a convenient excuse to head there - and to bug Magic Mike.

So with a few Skype interviews under his belt and one in person interview later, he started  - well as of yesterday - a job in Chicago......the only city colder than Cleveland I'd seriously consider living.

He's 23, so giving advice seems to fall on deaf ears. I watch it slough off like he's made of Teflon. So I parse out my words of "wisdom" sparingly, knowing that the other things your 20s are for are making mistakes and hopefully learning from them.

Matt is going to crash with a high school friend who graduated from Northewestern. Sorry - a high school friend and three of his roommates, none of which Matt has met or vice versa. It sounds like he'll be on the floor or perhaps a futon (another thing your 20s are for, I suppose). I have to believe the apartment is under his friend's name, as Matt didn't seem to need the approval of moving in from the other two.

Don't ask what he's doing exactly - as I don't know. Nor do I know what he's making and if it is sustainable for city living - three roommates or not. It is Chicago, so no matter what, it won't be enough. I do know he gets medical / dental / vision benefits, which you wouldn't think is such a big thing, but so many things he was interviewing for did not offer. He'll save a little money for a few years, as his parents agreed to keep him on their plan until he is 26 (thank you ACA!).

Matt also traded in his very used car for a newer used car. So with whatever fit inside it, he loaded up and headed out at the end of last week.

I wish him well....and it is an excuse to travel to Chicago. He's only a six hours away by car and like 49 minutes by plane. And I have friends in Chicago.....his mother thought it was nice that I had reason to go up, but my rationale was that my friends would help Matt out when (not if) he gets into trouble.

...and yes, that title image, is his last shot right before leaving the state of Ohio.




Song by: Fiona Apple

My Music Monday

Madness is the theme.

It was insanity last week.....and this one as well. Go with what you know. So maybe I am nuts.

In 1984, Lindsey Buckingham released his poorly, poorly produced second solo album, Go Insane. It was questionable at best. The disk had a two part song (last track of one side, first track of the second) and an almost seven minute song dedicated to the then newly-dead Dennis Wilson of the Beach Boys.

There were two somewhat salvageable songs on the disk, "Slow Dancing" and the lesser title track.

...and then Buckingham went and ruined even one of those by putting a shit-tastic video to it. The video for "Go Insane" is so insanely bad, it's not even funny-bad. It is just bad-bad. It became every cliché and everything that was wrong with video music all in one.

It is so bad, what little I could deal with the audio version, really made me shun the song entirely.

But in 1997, Buckingham remade and performed the song during Fleetwood Mac's reforming. With just him and an acoustic guitar, he slowed the pace to 4/4 time and made "Go Insane" palatable.

So he gets one more shot here. I'm sure he can thank me for the exposure later.


Lindsey Buckingham - "Go Insane"

12 of 12

So I'm doing my 72nd 12 of 12.

Normally it is 12 pictures taken on the 12th of the month. Since I only post once per day, you get my images the following day. All pictures taken with my iPhone. Click images to enlarge, if you choose.

Created by Chad Darnell and picked up from, what I can tell, any number of random bloggers who then link back to him and vice versa. Chad is no longer doing this, nor is successor coordinating the linking of other 12 of 12'ers anymore. Now it's just Erik (and sometimes Jim) and myself - that I know of. 

I still continue to do this, because of all my consistent post topics, I actually like this one the most.

 02:32.  Up in middle of the night. Petey was restless. I was ok to take care of him. 

06:40.  Pete somewhat resting comfortably. Me, not so much. Operating on less than three hours of sleep, or six hours of sleep over 48 hours. 

 07:00. 710's post-periodontal surgery instructions - as he had a procedure done yesterday- and Petey's pill cutter. 

 08:15. Ripping a cd to my iTunes liberry. 

 08:35. Mr. Pete finally waking up in the morning. 

11:55. Sign of Spring. Daffodils on the rise. 

 13:30. Lunch. I had neither. 

 14:45.  the Solstice Steps at Lakewood Park. 

15:15.  Shot of a plaque at Lakewood Park. Allegedly, it was the last station of the Underground Railroad. Who knew?

I mean, besides Harriet Tubman. 

15:40.  I'd say I encouraged 710 to get a coffee....and I did, but in reality, I had to poop. 

So...win-win. 

18:15. Getting 710's mom a new iPad as a surprise b-day present.  

20:29.  Sure, it looks like 21:29, but I sprung forward early. It beats doing it the next morning. 

and now your Baker's Dozen.........

22:25.  Cookie and milk. 

Yes, Singular.  Magic Mike XXS came through on his Oscar / Cookie pay-off (remember, I WON!). 

I was a little incredulous at only getting a dozen - but he was right, they are huge. Well, were...past tense. They're gone now. He said to share and I did. 710 got six, I got six. 

They were very good. So in a way, Mike was a winner. But not THE winner. Let's just make that clear. I was. 

Poor Poor Pitiful Me

Another week.

I won't lie, it's been tough. Petey is chugging along, but I can't say he's thriving. I fear there is no more thriving.

We've been taking turns sleeping downstairs with him. Anything that helps if he needs up in the middle of the night or needs some medication for coughing or breathing. You do what you must.

End of last week, the dog walker got him out and they ran into a number of neighbors. Pete is the mayor of the 'hood, and hasn't been seen lately. I even got emails asking if he was ok. 

So I fucking LOVED the note from the dog walker. 

The next day, Pete and I did walk. he did ok. It was the short route, but still he did ok. And he stopped to smell stuff.......and I let him. 

 Sister and Brother hangin' in the kitchen. 

 Petey taking a nap in the office while 710 worked at home. His sleeps aren't always restful anymore, unfortunately. 

 Pippa and Wally stand-off.  

Actually, it was all good natured play. 

After work Sophie "love". 

We muddle through. Right now, there isn't much else we can do. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe he'll rebound but 2016 has not been kind to Mr. Pete.




Song by: Warren Zevon

sexcrime

A few months back I wrote about how my personal information was hacked when I was a vendor for government agencies. As I needed security clearance at some of them - can you believe they gave it to a guy like me?? - they had quite the plethora of 4-1-1 on yours truly.

Oddly, 710's was not. He was on my info and while other people I know also got hacked, their spouses / partners got the same notification that I did. 710 did not. I guess they didn't snoop enough on me.

Their loss.

So about once a month since, I've gotten 'alerts' from the site that has been monitoring any activity on these accounts. I'm finally getting used to them, but for a moment they always make my heart stop for just a second.

Logging on isn't that easy - which isn't a bad thing. You sign-on, or attempt to, and they have to send you an access code each and every time. I can deal with a little hoop-jumping when it comes to this level of security.

So the first time, I barely dared to see what 'activity' had taken place. I wasn't sure if I would find bank accounts pried into or if they opened two dozen credit cards under my name.

What I wasn't expecting was a list of sex offenders in and around town.

I suppose it's a nice-to-know, but I am not quire sure where it fits in a government breach. Is there some correlation of guys who advertise for Subway and who hack into accounts to commit identity theft?

Oh - and when you hover over their location, it gives full name and address. It doesn't say what they did and it is quite amazing that so many of them live together, though it might be some kind of half-way house.

I don't know all the ins and outs (get it?  get it??) of being a sex offender.

All I know is, that so far, no one has done anything to negatively affect my financials. Or my sexual reputation...that is, if that were possible.



Song by: the Eurythmics

Primary

Next Tuesday is possibly the most important primary election for which I'll ever cast a ballot.

Of course, if the Democrats win / retain the White House this November, in four years I might not be saying that. But part of me would like to think that if the GOP loses, they'd rethink their crazy-ass ways.

Hope springs eternal.

Clearly, I'm not voting Republican't. As always, I'm going Dem. I am after all - me.

I'll be honest - I voted Sanders.

Yes. Past tense. I placed my vote by mail this last week. I had no desire to venture down to the physical polling place. Anything I can do to avoid Trump / Rubio / Kasich / Cruz supporters

Hillary might very well win the nomination. She might very well win the general election, but I'm not 100% sure she should.

Granted, she's leaps and bounds a better choice than (t)Rump, Rubio or {shudder} Cruz, but really - who isn't?  Charles Manson would be preferable. Leopold and Loeb would be a better ticket.

But the game is rigged. I'm extremely disappointed that the Dems put their bigger debates on a Friday and Saturday night. It's not so much that I was ever going to watch them, but they made sure no one else would either. Sanders, or any of the other (then) three candidates got a lick of press.

And the rigged game also goes to "super delegates". It seems, like the general election, the voters mean little. It comes down to the super delegates and the electoral college. The general election tally is a just a 'nice to have'.

And what the fuck is a 'super delegate'. I know they don't wear capes, because Edna Mode would never allow that, dahling.

I'm voting for Bernie because I think he does have good ideas. And it's ok for him to push Hillary a little to the left. But let's face it, the man is an alter kocker. Yet I don't think the nomination should just be handed to Clinton, yet most of the DNC would tell you otherwise.

By the way: OMG on all the Hillary supporters who hate hate hate Bernie. Some of them are more vehement about him than they are about (t)Rump or Cruz. I think it is because he exposes Clinton as a moderate Republican't more than she is a Democrat - and it stings to be exposed that way.

Do I think Bernie can win the nomination? A few days ago I'd have said, "No". And it still might be a 'no', but he's making more inroads than I thinking anyone expected. It would be difficult to get the nod with the way the system is built. And even if it wasn't, the DNC has its own weighted playing field. Still, Hillary should be nervous. I think with a solid win in New Hampshire, Colorado, Minnesota, Oklahoma, Vermont, Kansas, Maine and Michigan and closer and close races in Iowa and South Carolina respectively, the man shouldn't be taken lightly.



Song by: the Cure

Cooking with Blobby

It was drawn in by 'red Thai chile'. I always am.

But the problem with Cleveland (or one of them)?  Good luck finding red Thai chilies anywhere.  I mean - short of going down to Asiantown.

Even Whole Foods doesn't sell them.  WTF?

So, one must substitute Serrano chilies - which aren't even red - into a dish. And I like them, but I just seem to cook with them a lot.

The dish was different enough for me, and for the most part I like(d) all the ingredients, so I thought I'd try it.

Spaghetti - 1/2 lb
Yogurt - 1.5 cups
Flour - 1 T
Garlic - 4 cloves, minced
Red Thai Chile - 1, minced  (or 2 Serrano chilies, in my case)
Lemon Zest - of two lemons
Lemon Juice - 1 T
Spinach - 10oz
Olive Oil - 2 T
Parmesan Cheese - 1/4 cup
Salt & Pepa

Mix yogurt and flour together until smooth - set to the side.  Start the water for the pasta. You don't need pics for either of those - do you?

While the pasta cooks , saute the peppers and garlic for two minutes on low heat. 

Add the yogurt / flour mixture, heat until it simmers. 

Add handfuls of spinach until it wilts completely. Then add lemon zest, lemon juice, salt and pepper. 

Drain and add the pasta, and toss.  I added more pepper.....because you can almost never have enough.   Ever. 

Plate up and put as much damn cheese on as you'd like. 

Maybe the peppers weren't hot to begin with. Maybe the yogurt neutralized them (can it do that?). But in the end, all you tasted was some garlic, a lot of lemon and some tang from the yogurt. As 710 said, my mother might have ruined lemon for him. When she cooks with it, lately she tends to overdo it.

The idea for the dish was right and overall it certainly wasn't bad, but it came off with little taste....and no spicy heat. There are leftovers, so I'll be taking it for lunch, but putting on the red pepper flakes.

I gotta salvage it somehow.

Lady

First week in March and we are 50% of the way through the movie goal for 2016.

So far, it's been an ok season, but as it turns out, they can't all be winners.

The Lady in the Van, finally came to town - well two weeks ago. But we just got around to seeing it this last weekend. We've seen previews since maybe last October or November.

Metacritic gave it a 70%. Rotten Tomatoes gave it 93%. That's quite a range. In terms of a test, that's C or an A-.  It's safe to say, my percentage is equal to or lower than Metacritic.

First off, there should be laws when it comes to previews. I always expect the trailer to make the movie look better than it actually is, but to make a movie out to be something it's not is completely different.

The preview made Lady in the Van look like a light-hearted comedy about an eccentric woman, but you know what? There is little funny about being homeless, mentally ill, incontinence or having dementia. I suppose it is much more difficult to lure audiences in with that premise.

There were a few lines that made me smile a little, and zero that made me laugh - though for the 27 seconds that James Corden was in it, made it a little better. And Frances de la Tour is always always always welcome. And you never see Dominic Cooper enough, though de la Tour and Cooper were both in the playwright / screenwriter's Allen Bennet's History Boys, which was a play and movie that came off far far better than this.

It's not to say that Maggie Smith and Alex Jennings don't do a good job, but I think the material itself drags them down.....and allegedly Smith played this role on stage back in 1999.

I liked the neighbors - the secondary characters - much more than the main ones.

When it was over, both 710 and I shrugged. We joked that seeing Son of Saul would have provided more laughs.

Perhaps if we went in with a better inkling of the actual movie / subject matter other than the two and one-half minute clip of quips we might have walked out differently.




2016 Movie Count / Goal:  09 of 18


Song by: Stevie Nicks

My Music Monday

Erik's theme for the month: songs about madness.

He didn't specify - and I didn't ask - if it was anger or crazy. I figured, without getting clarification, I could open up the possibilities a little.

I think it's safe to say I won't be doing any Fine Young Cannibals or Heart. It seems like those would be way too easy and too expected.

I suppose I could just do a month's worth of song by Madness. Do they have a month's worth of songs? I can think of three.

I suppose I'll start off with Jamiroquai. Save for maybe a few songs on their debut album, Maroon 5 became the poor man's Jamiroquai. And don't get me wrong - it's not like I know anything by the band other than their song, this song, "Virtual Insanity".

The song is ok. Nothing more.

At the time, in 1996 (TWENTY years ago!, can you believe it?), the video was cool. It was OK Go-like, before OK Go existed.

710 makes fun of me because I can't figure out how the video works. I get the treadmill floor, until it starts going the other way. And to be honest, I haven't given it that much thought or pondered too hard to figure it all out.

Nothing's Changed Here

I mentioned a little while ago that Christopher Kimball was out at Cook's Country / America's Test Kitchen.

As I said, depending on the story, he was ousted or quit. Still it was a show he developed and then sold out to a corporation, as he apparently did give a damn about the greenback, a dollar.

It's just that that corporation affiliation came to bite him on the ass.

That was a dish the test kitchen did not work all the kinks out of, apparently. And it was served cold!

So, the big question of the day - well a month ago, until I promptly forgot about it - was who would take over hosting duties? I never saw Kimball pick up more than a pair of tongs to help one of the chefs turn a chop. I am unsure of if he could actually cook at all.

I mean, I knew the host wouldn't be the dour one - whose name I cannot remember, and I'm guessing no one else can either. Becky is way way WAY too perky. Dan and Bryan are cute in their own way, but have made far too few appearances to qualify for the job.

That left Julia and Bridget - that is assuming the show hired from within.

If you recall, I've back storied an entire thing where I believe the two absolutely loathe each other. At the time of the firing / quitting, I told 710 it would be a cage-match to see who got the job and who joined Kimball on the unemployment line.

Two days ago, 710 forwarded me an email he got from America's Test Kitchen - because he subscribes, dontcha know - and he gleefully holds up the email with an image of the two new CO-hosts.

He so wanted to prove me wrong with my fiction.

I looked at it for 0.08 seconds, look back to what I was doing and go: "it's photoshopped". 


Song by: Dwight Yoakam

Oh Well

No Sophie today. When Pete is ailing, it's all about Pete. But he's not ailing as much as recovering.

A chauffeured pooch.  

When you're too old and tired to make the mile loop, Dad will come in his BMW to pick you up and take you home.  It's the life. 

Mr. Pete back at the vet for his follow-up. 

He's doing better. He's healing. But he's on two additional weeks of antibiotics. Anymore, that is just the norm. 

Boomer at my mother's house. 

He got on the sofa and crashed next to 710. There was a time we suspected Boomer never slept at all - as he was always on high alert. 

My niece's cat, Pippa is home for two weeks. 

She's not technically a Maine Coon, but you'd never know it from the tail when she's "on". 

So...........whatta eatin' there?  How much is left? Is there any for me???

Another week from now, and who knows? 

Song by: Fleetwood Mac

Site of the Month

This one comes from 710 himself.

The man was a Urban Geography major and has a graduate degree in City Planning and Public Policy & Management. Don't get me wrong - he doesn't do those things, but it is his interest.

So when he found a sight called Geoguesser - he was beyond thrilled.

I've never seen Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?, but I have seen Where in the Fuck is that Loser, Matt Lauer?......so I'm sure it's pretty much the same thing - minus the hat.

And the answer to the Matt Lauer question is: wherever Ann Curry isn't.

Anyhoooo.....geoguesser uses Gooooooogle StreetVew and it drops you down somewhere in the world.

You can specify what country you want to play in, or you just go all over the globe.

Like here, you look at foliage, or you might figure that cars are driving on an opposite side of the street.....or there are waves and palm trees.  You get the idea.

Then you drop your pin where you think the location is.  You can zoom in with the controls in the upper left of the map screen.

Then you hit "make guess".

Then it tells you how right or wrong you've guessed.

At least I got the right country.



I have to say, 710 is really good at this. He normally gets within a few 100 miles. I haven't played that much, but it's fun.  ...and it just reminds me of how many places I haven't been.

Dark History Theme

It is a little scary. We are getting closer and closer to this election called (t)Rump.

Super Tuesday was Super to him. Though he lost Texas and Oklahoma, as if anyone can "lose" them. Lord knows I'd like to try.

I don't know how polling numbers can be so far off. So many predicted Cruz would lose Texas and then drop out of the race. And he won it handily.

And I'm torn. Of course, I want that sour pussed loser (you really really really should click on that hyperlink) to lose. But lose at what cost? As I've said before, what is the lesser evil here? If it weren't for my antidepressants, this would keep me awake at night.

A friend of mine was chatting about how the GOP has to come to terms with who their base really is. They have assumed that their conservative Christian morons who love Jesus and little babies. But they've been wrong this whole time. They're really anarchists and racists.

I'm not sure this wasn't something they didn't know. I believe they wanted to believe they were Jesus-loving folks, but they're not. And I'd say they have to own the racist part of this, but I think they already do - and now they're finding that so many don't even care now that it is out in the open.

Again.

"They"say: those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.

But who are the ones forgetting history?  I don't think it's the GOP. While their PR department would have you believe otherwise, they are on this like white on rice. Because any other colour rice is wrong.

Or is the everyone else who is forgetting history and just allowing this to happen?

I suppose we will find out in November.

That all said - and I have said it before - I don't understand (t)Rump's end-game. I still do not believe it is the White House. But he's in too deep now - there is no going back.....or is there?  And with all but Cruz, Rubio and sad sad sad John Kasich still in the race (who says if he doesn't win Ohio, he's out.........and I think Donald is polling better than Kasich here).

Don't even get me started on Christie-Kreme.

My friend said he was in Albany (where he lives) and was said to have been sneaking out of (t)Rump's hotel room.

I was skeptical, as any seismograph would pick up his moves.

Still.....he insisted. And showed me the unmistakable proof......

Ya really can't argue with the facts.




Song by: New York Orchestra 

Tunnel of Love

Maybe love should be in quotes. Air quotes at best.

I was so excited to learn that there was going to be a inflatable colon in the lobby of our building today.

In my mind, I built it up to be more of a big maze...twisting and turning for a while until you came out one end or the other.

Alas, it was not meant to be.

However, it was like 9 feet high and 15 long. And about as wide as some people I know.

The Family Guy phrase - "is there any tread left on that thing, or is more like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?" came to mind.  Maybe more than once.

Of course. on this one, there is definitely tread, but it is not the kind of ribbed for his pleasure that you're looking for.

Or not the kind that I'm looking for. I shouldn't answer for you.

Apparently it was some Chron's and Colitis awareness day / week / month thing. I didn't stop for literature. I figured, I got cleaned-out and scoped like three months ago, I'm good.

I also didn't really walk into the 'tunnel'. Sometimes there are things you just don't want to know.

Of course, I also had to think - was this a traveling exhibition, or do we just deflate it and put it into storage until next year? And who actually does one have to contract to get an inflatable colon?

You never see that on How It's Made!


Song by: Bruce Springsteen

You Win My Love

Canine Kisses.  It's the only love that Magic Mike XXS is feeling these days.

The self-professed king of Oscar Pool winning has fallen.

Sure, I love him, but he might be finding that hard to believe, even though I didn't even gloat.

Honest.

A tie would not surprise me in the slightest. Not with Magic Mike. Not with how most of our match-ups have gone. And clearly not with the rest of you, since once again, no one else has actively participated in the 5th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®.

Your loss. More cookies for me.......or Mike.

No. They're for me. Just me.

Last year, Michael and I only differed on eight of the 24 categories. This year it is only six (yes Mike, your math was correct), so this left a teeny-tiny margin of error for either one of us. But as I' mentioned to him, 'all you need is one', which he stated should be the name of my autobiography.

By the fourth category, Mike was up.....by one. By the 10th award - and 14 hours into the show - we were indeed tied.

And by the time I went to bed - with seven awards still to go, I was ahead.....by one. Mike accurately predicted that the best he could do was tie. Again, his math was correct. He faltered - as did most folks - on the Best Supporting Actor. I was wrong too, but why would anyone bet on Sly Stallone?

Mike commented that it was Stallone's last shot for an Oscar. But I reminded him that Sly could easily make a sequel to his truck driving / arm-wrestling mega-hit. That has "winner" written all over it.

The show was s-l-o-w as molasses....and not as sweet. Chris Rock killed the monologue (I loved loved loved his dig at Jada Pinkett Smith)....and little else. Kevin Hart did no better. And then there was Clueless' "Dionne" making such a bad "joke" that you could hear a pin drop in the auditorium. It was what I call 'Whitney Cummings stand-up awkward bad'.

Mike, "my friend", called me a "wuss" and "pussy" for not staying up until the end of the show.

He's a charmer, that Mike.

It's a wonder he's still married. And I didn't dare tell him I've been called a lot worse for a lot less. He'd take that 4-1-1 and run with it.

But honestly, it was 23:10 - and with seven awards and Mr. (yes, I still think "she" is a dude) Gaga still hadn't performed her rape song.  Maybe Mike didn't need his beauty sleep (because he's already so beautiful? or because no amount of sleep could help him?  discuss.), but I did.

The results are below, which shows I was the winner!

Best Original Screenplay - both won
Best Adapted Screenplay- both won

Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role - both won

Achievement in Costume Design - Mike won

Achievement in Production Design - both won

Achievement in Makeup and Hairstyling - both won

Achievement in Cinematography - both won

Achievement in Film Editing - both won

Achievement in Sound Editing - both won
Achievement in Sound Mixing - I won. ME ME ME!
Achievement in Visual Effects - both lost (can you fucking believe it?)

Best Animated Short Film - both lost

Best Animated Feature Film - both won

Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role - both lost (this is bullshit!)

Best Documentary Short Subject - I won.  ME ME ME - again!!!!

Best Documentary Feature - both won

Best Live-Action Short Film - both lost

Best Foreign-Language Film - both won

Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures (Original Song) - both lost*
Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures (Original Score) - both won
Achievement in Directing - both won
Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role - both won
Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role - both won
Best Motion Picture of the Year - and at the risk of sounding smug: I WON!

* If you heard Sam Smith "sing" "Writing's on the Wall" I think you'd agree we were all losers. As I said to Mike, the writing might be on the wall, but the notes to this song are not. He was everywhere. It was a horrid performance - and had his winning been based on that performance alone, he'd have been a loser.

Yes, there are exclamation points there, but I really wasn't gloating. Honest.

I feel bad - almost - for snatching the prize from Mike. For a long while he was on his way to a clean sweep. Well, until Sound Mixing. And I pulled ahead with a complete pin-the-tail move on Short Subject Documentary.

I laughed at the makers of Amy - one who said, "all she needed was fans".  Well yeah, that and Narcan - but that didn't happen.

I'll be honest, as the night went on, I wondered if Mad Max would win best pic and director. It cleaned up most other things. And with direction and cinematography I thought maybe the Revenant. I broke the cardinal rule of voting for something I thought should win, other than would win. And yet it paid off with Spotlight. I was very happy that won.

I feel bad for Mark Ruffalo. When they announced best supporting actor, they go "Mark R....." and it turned out to be another Mark R.  That had to suck.

...not as much as Stacy Dash and her bomb of an appearance sucked (and the Star Wars thing fell flat!), but still.....

So allegedly cookies are coming my way.

And Mike may not have won the competition, but he's won my friendship - - and isn't that more important?

{crickets}  {crickets}  {crickets}




Song by: Shania Twain