Only You

I find it almost implausible that Mike saw multiple entries into this (well, last) year's movies. I supposed when you're older and retired one can plant themselves in the reclining seats at the theater and get the gist of the movie while you actually take your daily nap. 

Though I'm sure he's awake enough for popcorn and Jujubes. 

We had fun texting during the awards. He had to remind me they were actually on. It never occurred to me they'd start at 19:00. 

Regarding the show, there wasn't much to be critical of - except Cynthia Erivo's nails. I could not figure out how she'd work a toilet paper roll, but Mike assured me she "had people for that". We both figured that physically Demi Moore was unable to fully close her mouth. Botox gone bad? And Timothy Chalamet just needs a long bath. Lots of soap and scrubbing. 

And while I like Adrian Brody, man that 110 minute speech just tested everyone's patience. Everyone being Mike and myself. If it were the Gong Show.......I'm 100% certain JP Morgan or Jaime Farr would have hit it. 

I loved Mick Jagger coming out to present. He's older than Mitch McConnell who couldn't have flowed across that stage with as much fluidity (read: any) of Mick. Mike thought he looked like a Muppet.  I'm assuming he meant Janice. 

This also looks about how Meg Ryan did during the last award. Mind you, this is way better than she has in the past few years.  .....and Goldie Hawn's very very recent face peel looked ok on the 173 year old actress. 

Ok, maybe I had a few more criticisms than I thought. 

Normally we are in the mid-single digits for things on which we differ - at least movie wise. This year, there were 11 (!!) things up for contention. On the other 12 we would either both gonna win or lose together, so it really came down to the 11. 

I like prime numbers, so I felt this might be an omen. A good one. Not like the Damien kind. It's also an odd number, which theoretically means we could not tie as we have done in the past. 

And trust me, there was no tie. The aforementioned omen much more evil than Damien. I was Lee Remmick dangling from the upper staircase in this metaphor. 

Mike prevailed. Again. He only loves his alcohol more than his Oscar wins. Only one of those won't hurt his liver.....unless he falls onto the statuette. 

Mathematically it was over for me a little more than halfway through. Mike got the first six (of the 11) very early on, and eventually near the end, Only after he got those six, I finally eked out three. I really started to think it would be a total shut out. Two other categories we both lost on. 

Don't get me wrong, I picked many categories correctly, but those were all ties with Mike. Just my individual selections bombed. 

In the past, Mike, appropriately so, has made fun of me for not sticking with the telecast. But as this started an hour earlier and mostly moved along (well, except for Brody), I was awake for the entire thing. I thought Conan did a decent job. 

Mike was a gracious winner - I mean, as gracious as he can be with barely showing empathy and / or compassion. Bottom line - he stopped short of pointing and laughing at me. At least via text. What went on in person is anyone's guess. 

Meanwhile, I remained pleasant and congratulated him on his win. I said 'congrats', what more do you people want from me????

I was afraid the accounting team of Dewey, Cheatem & Howe were not going to be available for results tabulation due to all the work going on at DOGE, but then it occurred to me that DOGE aren't actually doing any auditing. So the trio was able to squeeze us into their busy schedules making sure the 14th Annual Academy Award Guessing Games®  is on the up and up. 

Best picture - both win

Best director - Blobby wins

Best actress - both lost

Best actor - both win

Best supporting actress - Mike wins

Best supporting actor -  both win

Best original screenplay - Mike wins

Best adapted screenplay - both win

Best international feature - both win

Best documentary feature - Mike wins

Best animated feature - Mike wins

Best cinematography - both win

Best costume design - both win

Best film editing - Mike wins

Best production design - both win

Best original score - both win

Best original song - both win

Best sound - Blobby wins

Best visual effects - both win

Best makeup and hairstyling - Mike wins

Best documentary short - both lose

Best animated short - both lose

Best live-action short - Blobby wins

It is amazing to note that we have done this for 14 years. Mike is a good foil and overall a decent guy. I just give him a hard time here.............and no doubt will continue to do so. 

Until next year, when the Pauley Shore biopic comes out with Emo Phillips as the star........we will see you at the movies. 

Song by: Yaz

Unnatural Selection

Blobby is uncharted territory with the 14th Annual Academy Award Guessing Games®. I'm kind of in Mike territory, actually. 

....and that is a scary place to be..........I'm told. 

Normally, I'm the one who has seen a handful of the movies in question and Mike has maybe seen one. Sometimes none. 

That would be me this year. 

None. 

Not one in any category. Some I haven't even heard about or of. Usually, I get at least that much 4-1-1: titles.  But alas, not reading news of most any kind has left me at a disadvantage. 

....or has it? 

Mike sees jack-squat and with his utter lack of knowledge usually prevails here (not just with movies, either, I must say). Maybe he's onto something.

I'm not even sure I can contribute a lot of quirky (read: funny) comments below. It won't stop me from trying, though it probably should. 

Mike has told me he's voting Wicked as a straight (ha!) ticket - even in the categories in which they are not nominated. That would give me a HUGE advantage, as I can't see them winning in the ones for which they did get nods. 

I considered voting for everything Emilia Pérez because, well.......illegal alien sounding name. And if it sweeps, it would just ignite MAGA. It's going to anyway, but.......let's pour on the gasoline. 

Alas, I'm just making guesses. Even more than before. 

Mike will post his selections in the comments section. 

Best picture "Anora" (Neon) "The Brutalist" (A24) "A Complete Unknown" (Searchlight) "Conclave" (Focus) "Dune: Part Two" (Warner Bros.) "Emilia Pérez" (Netflix) "I'm Still Here" (Sony Classics) "Nickel Boys" (Amazon/MGM) "The Substance" (Mubi) "Wicked" (Universal) 

Is there a world where Wicked should win - or be nominated?  Short answer is 'no'.  The long answer is "noooooooooo". 

Best director Sean Baker, "Anora" Brady Corbet, "The Brutalist" James Mangold, "A Complete Unknown" Jacques Audiard, "Emilia Pérez" Coralie Fargeat, "The Substance" 

Best actress Cynthia Erivo, "Wicked" Karla Sofia Gascón, "Emilia Pérez" Mikey Madison, "Anora" Demi Moore, "The Substance" Fernanda Torres, "I'm Still Here" 

I mean, she was robbed for no nods for St. Elmo's Fire or GI Jane. This is just payback. 

Best actor Adrian Brody, "The Brutalist" Timothée Chalamet, "A Complete Unknown" Colman Domingo, "Sing Sing" Ralph Fiennes, "Conclave" Sebastian Stan, "The Apprentice" 

I love Fiennes, but it's not his year. Nor Chalamet's. Maybe had he been nominated for Dune. To be fair, I've only seen (and liked) Brody in Wes Anderson movies, and one Tori Amos video. I'd say he'd "win by a nose", but that things half the size of Iowa. 

Best supporting actress Monica Barbaro, "A Complete Unknown" Ariana Grande, "Wicked" Felicity Jones, "The Brutalist" Isabella Rossellini, "Conclave" Zoe Saldaña, "Emilia Pérez" 

C'mon!  Original nepo baby for the win!  Listen - as long as it doesn't go to Wicked, I'd be happy. But we love Isabella. 

Best supporting actor Yura Borisov, "Anora" Kieran Culkin, "A Real Pain" Edward Norton, "A Complete Unknown" Guy Pearce, "The Brutalist" Jeremy Strong, "The Apprentice" 

It's Kendall v Roman. Though I like Guy Pearce. But just like in Succession, Kendall (Strong) isn't getting the nod.  (oh yeah, Succession spoiler alert)

Best original screenplay "Anora," Sean Baker "The Brutalist," Brady Corbet & Mona Fastvold "A Real Pain," Jesse Eisenberg "September 5," Tim Fehlbaum & Moritz Binder "The Substance," Coralie Fargeat 

The only way Eisenberg is ever going to be introduced as, "Academy Award winner......"

Best adapted screenplay "A Complete Unknown," Jay Cocks & James Mangold "Conclave," Peter Straughan "Emilia Pérez," Jacques Audiard, Thomas Bidegain & Nicolas Livecchi "Nickel Boys," RaMell Ross & Joslyn Barnes "Sing Sing," Clint Bentley, Greg Kwedar, Clarence Maclin & John "Divine G" Whitfield 

Gotta throw something to the Catholics. I mean, they never get any love!

Best international feature "I'm Still Here," Walter Salles (Brazil) "The Girl with the Needle," Magnus von Horn (Denmark) "Emilia Pérez," Jacques Audiard (France) "The Seed of the Sacred Fig," Mohammad Rasoulof (Germany) "Flow," Miguel Gomes (Latvia) 

It's the Roma of 2025. If you can't take the big prize, you get the international one. As long as you're nominated for both, that is. 

Best documentary feature "Black Box Diaries," Shiori Itō (MTV) "No Other Land," Basel Adra, Hamdan Ballal, Yuval Abraham & Rachel Szor (No distributor) "Porcelain War," Brendan Bellomo & Slava Leontyev (Picturehouse) "Soundtrack to a Coup d'Etat," Johan Grimonprez (Kino Lorber) "Sugarcane," Julian Brave NoiseCat & Emily Kassie (Nat Geo) 

Had the BLOTUS' / Zelensky's oval office conversation taken place before ballot voting, Porcelain War might have taken this - it still might. All movies look worthy, but I love the juxtaposition of Coup d'Etat. 

Best animated feature "Flow" (Janus Films/Sideshow) "Inside Out 2" (Disney/Pixar) "Memoir of a Snail" (IFC Films) "Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl" (Aardman/Netflix) "The Wild Robot" (Dreamworks/Universal) 

I so wanted it to be Wallace & Gromit, but I think not. 

Best cinematography "The Brutalist," Lol Crawley "Dune: Part Two," Greig Fraser "Emilia Pérez," Paul Guillaume "Maria," Edward Lachman "Nosferatu," Jarin Blaschke 

Best costume design "A Complete Unknown," Arianne Phillips "Conclave," Lisy Christl "Gladiator II," Janty Yates "Nosferatu," Linda Muir "Wicked," Paul Tazewell 

This movie was about style over substance, right?  Not Substance. 

Best film editing "Anora," Sean Baker "The Brutalist," Dávid Jancsó "Conclave," Nick Emerson "Emilia Pérez," Juliette Welfling "Wicked," Myron Kerstein 

no witty remark. 

Best production design "The Brutalist," Judy Becker "Conclave," Suzie Davies "Dune: Part Two," Patrice Vermette "Nosferatu," Craig Lathrop "Wicked," Nathan Crowley 

see Best Costume design

Best original score "The Brutalist," Daniel Blumberg "Conclave," Volker Bertelmann "Emilia Pérez," Clément Ducol & Camille "Wicked," John Powell & Stephen Schwartz "The Wild Robot," Kris Bowers 

I listened to nothing. But you gotta figure the Brutalist would have an imposing score - just by title alone. 

Best original song "Never Too Late," "Elton John: Never Too Late" (Elton John & Brandi Carlile) "El Mal," "Emilia Pérez" (Clement Ducol, Camille & Jacques Audiard) "Mi Camino," "Emilia Pérez" (Clement Ducol & Camille) "Like a Bird," "Sing Sing" (Adrian Quesada & Abraham Alexander) "The Journey," "The Six Triple Eight" (Diane Warren) 

Honestly - anything that's not Elton is fine with me. Like I said last time, he's worth $500M and still wears shitty hair - whomever's it is. Or was. 

Best sound "A Complete Unknown" "Dune: Part Two" "Emilia Pérez" "Wicked" "The Wild Robot" 

I'm assuming a lot of sand noises. 

Best visual effects "Alien: Romulus" "Better Man" "Dune: Part Two" "Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes" "Wicked" 

How many fucking Planet of the Apes movies are there???? And WHY?

Best makeup and hairstyling "A Different Man" "Emilia Pérez" "Nosferatu" "The Substance" "Wicked" 

see Best Production design. 

Best documentary short "Death by Numbers" "I Am Ready, Warden" "Incident" "Instruments of a Beating Heart" "The Only Girl in the Orchestra" 

Torn here. I hope it is Instruments or the Orchestra. Both music oriented, one with a woman, one with a girl. 

Best animated short "Beautiful Men" "In the Shadow of the Cypress" "Magic Candies" "Wander to Wonder" "Yuck!" 

I watched all the trailers at least. None wow'd me. So, maybe the one where one of the animated guys looks like he's hanging brain?

Best live-action short "A Lien" "Anuja" "I'm Not a Robot" "The Last Ranger" "The Man Who Could Not Remain Silent"

Saw the trailers here. Most looked intriguing, but I like this premise of the I am Not a Robot. 

You will all find out Tuesday who has won. 

As to what we've won is another matter. I never fulfilled my obligation last year - as I lost. So, I suppose it will be double or nothing. And in that regard - either way, I lose. 

Song by: Muse

My Eyes are T-Shirts

Never let it be said that I don't pay my debts.................eventually. 

I'm sure I still owe a few someones out there a few somethings. Probably cash. Or coke. 

Last week, I said Mike and I had not discussed any type of prize for The 12th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®   I believe he could have just basked in the glory by itself, but that wasn't really gonna do. 

During the broadcast - at least the part for which I stayed awake - I looked for a prize. And found one. Unfortunately, he found the item as well, which I hoped he would not. He just didn't know it would be the win from our contest. 

As you may remember, we had some good, albeit brief, fun with the Animated Short section. I went with the winner. Mike went with My Year of Dicks.......as I knew he would, as he is predictable that way. 

Upon his win, the next day I contacted Mike's much better half and requested a verification on his shirt size.  I won't divulge it here, as you know how people are about their body size. That's only between his WW coach or every carny on the East coast. ......or Carnie Wilson.....and him.  And me. 

I mean, had the Whale been nominated for Best Pic, just to fuck with him, I'd have gotten him the  XXXXXXXXXXXXL.  I mean, if they're not selling those then what is the point of My 600 lb Life (possibly my autobiography title) and shows like it? 

Ordering didn't go as planned. The site started off with the billing address..........and then it turns out, no shipping address They assume, if you bought it, you want it. 

You know what I didn't want?  To get the shirt and have to go to the fucking post office.............for Mike. Well, for anyone. It's just fun to get in that specific jab. The order, the site, nothing, had any contact information. I didn't even get a confirmation email that might have had the 4-1-1- on where I could reach out to someone. 

Luckily, they have a Twitter handle (which doesn't work for me, since I dumped Elon months back) and one for InstaGram. I reached out via the latter. 

First off, yay they're giving the profits to Texas reproductive rights. I'm going with the baby arm in the title image that maybe their film has something to do with a woman's body not being ruled by white men in government. 

Secondly......Secret Admirer situation !!!  Is it a 'situation'?  Is it 'secret'?   I suppose it could be a situation, but 'admirer' seems like a lot. And I mean, a LOT.  For some reason I upper-cased the F in 'friend'. Isn't that enough? 

Thirdly........I'm part of Team Dicks!   ....and unlike most teams, I didn't even get picked last for this one!! Heck, I might even be able to make team captain..............or at least 'ball boy'.     ......see what I did there??

Naturally, Mike knows this will be a post. Well he knows there IS a post. He can only guess at the content....to a degree. He asked me to be kind.  Actually, he said "If you can't be mind (not MY typo!), at least be funny". 

I promised the latter only. I think I did ok. 

I will await tales of his wearing it to the mall and to Sunday dinner at his mother's house. I'm guessing one more martini and he'll care less and less about where he wears it. 

My debt is paid, even though technically I didn't have one. He won. He deserved it. And unlike the Armie Hammer phone case, hopefully the shirt's creators won't turn into cannibals. 

Song by: Matt Berninger

One

Let's drag out this post, like they drag out the Oscars. 

Can we first critique Mike's comments? 

I get he was in a different time zone when he wrote them, but it only got one laugh from me. Mind you, it was a big one. The thought of Dame Judi Dench saying "My Year of Dicks" almost made me snort.  

And for the umpteenth year in a row he signs in as "anonymous".  I suppose "Deep Throat" was taken - and maybe the name doesn't apply to him, you'd have to ask around - but the sad fact of the matter this: he doesn't remember his gmail or yahoo sign-in / password. 

I'd have to go back and check, but I do believe this year is the largest gap in our selections: 11.  I want to say the most before this has been 7-8.  Usually it hovers in the 4-5 category. Those were great, because if they did those earlier in the program, I could mathematically declare the winner and go to bed, reading for details, if necessary, the next day.  

More on that in a bit. 

The show: meh. Nothing horribly exciting or horribly bad, but I'm loving Kimmel who should just host yearly. And man did he slam the audience about Will Smith. The whole security thing and violence at the awards and then said, "or do what you did last year. Nothing Maybe give him a hug afterwards".  I believe 88% of the celebs didn't get that it was at their expanse. 

My other take a way.  Lady Gag Gag.  I know we are supposed to be for trans rights, but yikes.....this dude.....

That is one severe look. 

Of course, when (s)he performed, someone took sandpaper to her face to get the layers and layers of make-up off so she could look "real" for her absolutely shiteous song from Top Gun. Sorry - it was just awful. It made "Take My Breath Away" sound like a classic. I told Mike, if she won, I was scrapping the Oscars thing - totally not worth it, and a good reason never to actually see Top Gun.   .....and why did (s)he got a 3 minute talking intro?  No one else did.  

I gotta give it to Short Round - from the acceptance speeches I saw (true, I only made it to a little after 22:00 - or like 12 awards in) he was pretty fucking good. Those acting classes are finally paying off. 

And Julia Louis Dreyfus nailed it as usual and that was as a presenter. The whole crappy Disney ad, since they own ABC, was just a big fucking turd, as was the shameless introduction like it was an award for their new Little Mermaid. All of it a cheap and embarrassing tactic for ABC and Disney. 

But as the race between Blobby and Mike goes........and of course, I hate to say it...........Mike won.  

By one. 

But one more than myself. 

I did myself in with the Director selection. I got cock / wishful that it wouldn't be the Daniels. I lost that bet. I lost the race. 

While I didn't think I'd lose on 'Best Song', who the actual fuck thought RRR (or whomever they are) would win? And worse, who thought Mike would pick that?  It certainly didn't help matters. 

For most of the broadcast - for which I stayed awake - we were pretty much even. And honestly, there were 11 opportunities to bust a win / loss wide open.......yet it didn't happen. A margin of one. It could have been so much worse. For one, I could have stayed up for the entire show and texted with Mike the entire time. So, in a way, he REALLY won. 

As always, since my fuck up in year one, the accounting firm of Dewey, Cheatham & Howe has the official tabulation below. 

Best Picture - both won

Best Director - Mike wins

Best Actress - both won

Best Actor - both won

Best Supporting Actress - Mike wins

Best Supporting Actor - both won

Cinematography - Blobby wins

Editing - both won

Original Screenplay - both won

Adapted Screenplay - Blobby won

Production Design - both lost

International Feature - both won

Animated Feature - both won

Animated Short - both lost

Documentary Feature - Mike wins

Documentary Short - both lost

Live-Action Short - Blobby wins

Visual Effects - Blobby wins

Original Song - Mike wins

Original Score - Mike wins

Sound - both win

Makeup and Hairstyling - both lost

Costume Design - both lost

I'm guessing he never gets this far in the post where I remind folks to look at the title image. Honestly, I can't believe the man even talks to me.

Perhaps there will be 13th year of this nonsense.  

Song by: Three Dog Night

Playing to Win

It is THAT time. The time of year of which none of you are waiting..........or in which you never participate. The 12th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®     

It's a horse race. 

That's "horse".  Say it correctly. 

Lord, can you believe Mike and I have been doing this for 12 years? And all because of a flip comment on his blog on how he "always wins the office pool" regarding the Oscars. I took the bait. He challenged. I accepted........and a dozen years later.........here we are. 

Cookies, cupcakes, phone cases, movie tickets, booze and barbs have been exchanged. I'm mostly in it for the barbs...........and the cookies. Lately, there have been no prizes for the winner, which is ok, as I'd be broke. 

Mike had to remind me that the awards were this week, which means I had to do the work of the ballot and getting it to him. Mind you, as he is older, he is retired and has time on his hands. Naturally, those hands are clucthing a martini glass, but you'd still think he could have done a little of the work.    ......you'd think!!

So after I post this, he'll amend his selections to end up beating me by like 2-3 categories. Normally, we try to be witty about our selections, but we'll see. For both of us. 

Yearly, I fight choosing what will win versus what I think should win. I know this going in and I still go with the what should.........hence all my losses to secondest bestest dad to Ollie. 

Let's get this over with.......shall we? 

Best Picture “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans” “Tár” “Top Gun: Maverick” “Triangle of Sadness” “Women Talking”

Honestly, I don't even think this one is a contest, is it?  The movie is a LOT, but at least it doesn't have Tom Cruise in it. 

Best Director Martin McDonagh, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, “Everything Everywhere All at Once” Steven Spielberg, “The Fabelmans” Todd Field, “Tár” Ruben Ostlund, “Triangle of Sadness” 

Yes, I'm bucking the Daniels. I am. This category alone might cause me to lose, but I'll do it in good conscience. While Banshees was sometimes figuratively painful to watch, it was beautifully written and shot. 

Best Actress Cate Blanchett, “Tár” Ana de Armas, “Blonde” Andrea Riseborough, “To Leslie” Michelle Williams, “The Fabelmans” Michelle Yeoh, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

C'mon. You know it's gonna be the Crouching Tiger; Leaping Lizards lady. She was great. 

Best Actor Austin Butler, “Elvis” Colin Farrell, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Brendan Fraser, “The Whale” Paul Mescal, “Aftersun” Bill Nighy, “Living”

Full disclosure: did not see the Whale. If you want to see Fraser in something good, he's in like a 4-5 episode arc of Scrubs from like 18 years ago. Butler was semi-fine, but not win-worthy though I could easily lose this one. Honestly, I originally voted for Farrell, but decided I wanted to win. I still hope Farrell wins. 

Best Supporting Actress Angela Bassett, “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” Hong Chau, “The Whale” Kerry Condon, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Jamie Lee Curtis, “Everything Everywhere All at Once” Stephanie Hsu, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

Condon has pulled off this award at other shows. BAFTA, Golden Globes - though she had that in the bag, as she's foreign herself.  I know the money is on Curtis and personally I like her, but I don't quite get the praise for her in Everything. She was fine. And that's it.  Stephanie Hsu however has NOT be recognized at any award show and she may have been the best part of Everything. 

Best Supporting Actor Brendan Gleeson, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Brian Tyree Henry, “Causeway” Judd Hirsch, “The Fabelmans” Barry Keoghan, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Ke Huy Quan, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

Yeah, Quan was SUPER annoying as Short Round in the shiteous second Indiana Jones movie- second in annoyance to Kate Capshaw - who fucked her way right to the top. But his racistly named Waymond, is what helped some very confused viewers (read: me) figure out the semi-entire multi-verse thing going on in the movie.  I'm also having a hard time with Gleeson being listed as Supporting here. He was def, co-lead of Banshees. 

Cinematography “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths” “Elvis” “Empire of Light” “Tár”

I did not see Quiet. Honestly, until the awards were announced I didn't even know they remade this. But I heard people liked it and somehow people love cinematography with war movies. Elvis had its moments for sure, but Luhrmann didn't do much new he hasn't done with all of his over the top visual movies 

Editing “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “Tár” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I'm surprised there are other nominees. A few months ago I lamented on how a filmmaker gets things to screen from a vision. Everything baffles me on every level on how they sold it, let alone made it. Editing doesn't even begin to tell of all the work that had to go in to piece this together. But this editor(s) deserves the award.....and then some. 

Original Screenplay “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans” “Tár” “Triangle of Sadness” 

Triangle of Sadness sounds like Mike's relationship with me and gin.  .....not in that order, I might add. It's hardly original. While I want to go with Banshees, I am leaning towards not. Everything isn't adapted, but I'm not sure it's original either. 

Adapted Screenplay “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery” “Living” “Top Gun: Maverick” “Women Talking” 

Well, it IS Women's History MONTH!.  They should get something!   ....or at least 73% of something. 

 Production Design “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “Babylon” “Elvis” “The Fabelmans”

Sure. Why the hell not? 

International Feature “All Quiet on the Western Front,” Germany “Argentina, 1985,” Argentina “Close,” Belgium “EO,” Poland “The Quiet Girl,” Ireland 

Quiet isn't winning the big best picture category, so it's gonna pull a Roma and win other category to which they were nominated.  This one. 

 

Animated Feature “Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio” “Marcel the Shell With Shoes On” “Puss in Boots: The Last Wish” “The Sea Beast” “Turning Red” 

Artsy Fartsy director meets a story most people think they know. 

Animated Short “The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse” “The Flying Sailor” “Ice Merchants” “My Year of Dicks” “An Ostrich Told Me the World Is Fake and I Think I Believe It”

Listen, I think we all know Mike is gonna pick the "My Year of Dicks".......just because of the title. Yeahhhh.....that's it.  But how are we not rooting for the Ostrich title?   I'd have picked the Dicks one too........if it were 'Years'. Plural. 

Documentary Feature “All That Breathes” “All the Beauty and the Bloodshed” “Fire of Love” “A House Made of Splinters” “Navalny”

Honestly, watching the trailers for all of these, most seem worth of the prize. I think the sentimental will be Splinters, as it's about the Ukraine. But I'm all about Bloodshed.  Fire of Love looks great.  

Documentary Short “The Elephant Whisperers” “Haulout” “How Do You Measure a Year?” “The Martha Mitchell Effect” “Stranger at the Gate” 

Who doesn't love a story about an ex-marine who went to blow up a mosque? Tale as old as time. 'Murica!

Live-Action Short “An Irish Goodbye” “Ivalu” “Le Pupille” “Night Ride” “The Red Suitcase”

I have nothing in which to back this up. The trailer looked good and it won the BAFTA prize and the Brits HATE Ireland, so...........it MUST be good. 

Visual Effects “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Batman” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I suppose Cameron & Co should get something for an 11 year wait and taking in two billion dollars. 

Original Song “Applause” (“Tell It Like a Woman”) “Hold My Hand” (“Top Gun: Maverick”) “Lift Me Up” (“Black Panther: Wakanda Forever”) “Naatu Naatu” (“RRR”) “This Is a Life” (“Everything Everywhere All at Once”) 

I have seen one of these movies - and if I've heard any of these songs, it's been unknowingly.....but, you know....Super Bowl star Rihanna is on this one (I think).  Or Rhianna. I know it's not Rhiannon. So that alone is a win............for me!

Original Score “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Babylon” “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans”

I'll assume the Fablemans was done by John Williams. ...and he has like 17 of these statues. Literally no one saw Babylon and the few who might have (and I'm talking the reviewers) didn't like it.  Once again, I'm going with Banshees. I don't remember the music at all, save for some pub songs - minus a finger or five. 

Sound “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Batman” “Elvis” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I dunno.  Jet noises?

Makeup and Hairstyling “All Quiet on the Western Front” “The Batman” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Elvis” “The Whale” 

The pomade bill alone was a good chunk of the budget. 

Costume Design “Babylon” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris”

I kind of want Mrs. Harris to take this. We wanted to see the movie, but missed the window. I'm sure it's streaming somewhere. 

So, the choices are locked in.  

Mike will make fun of me for not staying up for the show. Hell, I'm up at 04:00, and the show is only ending like 2.5 hours before that. I know it won't make me beautiful, but I do need some beauty sleep. 

I'm sure we'll recap this on Tuesday. Hopefully with me as the winner. 

Song by: Little River Band

I Will

I'm not an April Fool's guy. I tried it once here and got good results, but this kind of trickery isn't usually i my wheelhouse. 

I wish I could pull that off (that's what she said!), but it seems like a lot of work, and I already have a job. 

But you know, Will Smith has been the gift that keeps on giving this week.  And hat's off to Roger Murdock Kareem Abdul-Jabbar for his written piece on this whole scenario. It's one of the better items I've read on this thing - though admittedly, it's been limited. 

As the title image implied / states, there is no shortage of material that is mostly not in Smith's favour.  I'm all broken up about that {yawn}. 

I do not think he realizes no one is going to remember him for winning an Oscar - am I right Roberto Benigni?  .....yeah, I'm right. He finally won the thing he's been Oscar-baiting (and Oscarbating) for years, and now the only one who will remember he got it is the cleaning lady when she has to move it to dust. 

Most of the memes that are clogging the intertubes is the slap itself with rarely funny captions of who Chris Rock might be (say, 'my wallet') and Smith (say, 'the gas pump'). 

I only found two I found humourous. 

Oh no, Lucille II !!

....but it made me laugh. 

As did this. 

Yes, I get it's not supposed to, but it's not like I've ever been appropriate. 

Enjoy your April Fools........though this isn't one of them.

Song by: the Beatles

On Top

I am not saying I'm Nostradamus, or even Miss Cleo, but when I said in my Sunday post - and I quote - "....if Mike is true to his word (and I think we all know he's not)...",   he didn't select either Little Women or the Titanic as his top movie of the year.

As it turned out, it didn't matter.

As it also turned out, we differed by six of the 24 categories. It was a decent amount that could more easily determine a clear winner.  For a period of time, I believe both Mike and I thought we would end up in another tie, but then Special Effects spoiled that.............well, for him. Not so much fo me.

Spoiler Alert: I won !   But not gloating.

We could have called it a night at that, as there were still a handful of categories to come, but nothing that could change the outcome. A that point I was looking for, after a while, was to see if we were going to win all the other 18 categories on which we agreed upon. Our guessing stills were spot on.....until they weren't. Best original score. I did NOT see that coming......Mike either.

Then the wheels just came off........the big ones:  director and best picture. If you went back to my choices, I thought Parasite could be an upset, but I assumed for best pic, not for director.  Still, we both chose wrong.

I'm not sure if Mr. Mike and I were off our game, but our real time IM was all very civil. No real jokes or jabs. He didn't even ask me what time it was where I lived. It's an oldie, but goodie, just like Mike.  Now I'm wondering if he needs to be tested for the coronoavirus or something.  Or maybe we've just matured?

I mean, we didn't even make fun of anyone's clothes. Well.......I did, but just a skosh.

You know that moment when Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph came out and were "mad"? Well, I assumed it was at their stylist........and it turns out it wasn't. Their outfits weren't even a part of their "gag".  .....and that's a shame, because, I think they were unintentionally awful, though Rudolph's was still way better than her vonTrapp family curtain rejects from last year.

Wiig looks like Wiig had an Edna Mode reject for Elastagirl. And really, not black or red shoes?

They should have looked no further than Sigourney Weaver for inspiration.

Mike and I, well, we didn't oooh and aaah over her, but sang her praise....as it should be. This ladies of a certain age, is how you should strive to dress at such an event, if I say so myself.

....or Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

Faboo.  And she's worth like $4 Billion (with a 'b'), so I hope to fuck she purchased that necklace. I mean, it's tough to pass off at Ralph's, but wear that daily if you can.


.....and Regina King, whom I just adore.

And while I certainly applaud the Academy finally getting a female conductor after 92 years (for one number, I might add - not the entire show) someone should have told Eimear Noone that C3PO meets R2D2 wasn't the right choice.

......and speaking of "music".

O.M.F.G.  - honestly, were there only these songs released for any movie this year? There were NO other choices??  None??

That Frozen II number should have remained in ice. Once again, Idina Menzel did not take off her nose plug from her swim lesson to sing. The only redeeming thing about that song was the woman who did the backing vocal from the beginning. I thought the song from Harriet started out really strong and good, but then it just failed.  And g-d love Pixar for always always always hiring Randy Newman......but enough. It. was. bad. 

....yet not as bad as the "winner". Dame Elton sang a reconfigured, but shittier version, of "Philadelphia Freedom". It. was. horrid.  And I want to say I was validated by the Philly comment. I typed it (or a version of) to Mike and he goes, "ha! Peter just said the exact same thing."  I'm paraphrasing, of course. So it wasn't my imagination.

Then there was Eminem. I'm not a fan, but I'm not a detractor. My friend Jon was right in asking, "why invite him just to bleep his song, when you knew what song he would be singing - and that it had questionable language?"  I'm paraphrasing, of course.

However, the panning of the audience showed one big thing: every person of colour knew every word to the song, as did every white person under 35. Then you had the white folk in the elder bracket who just looked like, "WTF".

Poor Marty Scorcese actually winced during the performance. Now, this is a man who use the word 'fuck' in the Wolf of Wall Street - and I'm not kidding here- 506 times! It's in the Guinness World Book of Records.  So Marty, spare me, please.

It did occur to me - thanks again, Academy - that for some reason you have an 18 year old song performed at the Oscars. If you were in need of an older song by an "urban" artist, way to pick the white one, and not, oh say, Three Six Mafia for "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp", which also won an Academy Award.

I get the no host thing, and I'm on board with it, but stop with the "funny" intros. They're not funny. The presenters look anything but comfortable doing them. Stop bringing out Chris Rock only to soften the blow when he has to do your dirty work and explain why the nominees have no people of colour in them.

Just announce the awards and let people speak. I mean, overall, you didn't play too many people off, but damn, that show could be over in two hours. I get you lose the advertising dollars, but I'd be eternally grateful.  Ok..........that might be a lie, but.....you get it.

And for the official record, and the accounting offices of Dewey, Cheatham & Howe......here are the results.  Yes, Mike's name is in fuchsia.....thank you for noticing.

Performance by an actor in a leading role - both won
Performance by an actor in a supporting role - both won
Performance by an actress in a leading role - both won
Performance by an actress in a supporting role - both won
Best animated feature film of the year - Blob
Achievement in cinematography - both won
Achievement in costume design - both won
Achievement in directing - both lost
Best documentary feature - Mike
Best documentary short subject - Blob
Achievement in film editing - both won
Best international feature film of the year - both won
Achievement in makeup and hairstyling - both won
Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Score) - both lost
Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original song) - both won
Best motion picture of the year - both lost
Achievement in production design - both won
Best animated short film nominees - both won
Best live action short film - Mike
Achievement in sound editing - Blob
Achievement in sound mixing - both won
Achievement in visual effects - Blob
Adapted screenplay - both won
Original screenplay nominees - both won


And while I'm trying not to gloat, well...........give me this, just this once. This comes around so rarely.

Song by; the Killers

Second Guessing

It's that dreaded time of year. The one where Morty sees an 'award post' and just hits 'back' on his browser tab.

I get it. This isn't for everyone, though the irony is, Mort has seen most of these movies and probably has a better insight than say................Mike.....who has seen probably none of these movies.

Actually, he told me he saw one, though I now do not remember which one.

Anyways, this is our 9th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®

NINE!

I'd have to go back to see who is winning this so-called race, but I'm thinking I won't like the answer - so I'll just live, head buried in the sand, which resides in the land of MakeBelieve.

I probably say this every year, but this year seems the hardest. Especially in a few categories. Acting, not so much. It's not that I agree about the probable winners, but I know the writing on the wall when I see it. No, I'm stymied at best picture and director.  Stupid Parasite, making this more complicated than I anticipated.

That said, if Mike is true to his word (and I think we all know he's not), I could run away with this thing.

By all accounts, the four major acting (well, I guess that would be all of them) awards are a given. I don't expect Mike's choices on these to be different than mine. But then, things get tricky.....not for everything (I think), but enough that it could cost me............or him.

Let's have at it, shall we?

Performance by an actor in a leading role nominees: Antonio Banderas in PAIN AND GLORY Leonardo DiCaprio in ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Adam Driver in MARRIAGE STORY Joaquin Phoenix in JOKER Jonathan Pryce in THE TWO POPES

It should be Banderas, but this isn't going to go his way tonight. Should I be wrong and lose this contest due to it, I would be fine with the outcome - Antonio's and mine. I think we can all agree to be happy that Adam Sandler doesn't appear anywhere on this list. 

Performance by an actor in a supporting role nominees: Tom Hanks in A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD Anthony Hopkins in THE TWO POPES Al Pacino in THE IRISHMAN Joe Pesci in THE IRISHMAN Brad Pitt in ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD

I'm not happy with any of these options - other than maybe Hopkins, whom I think should win. But it looks like it will be Pitt. Only two people I know liked his movie, but that's still two more than who saw Hanks play Rodgers 

Performance by an actress in a leading role nominees: Cynthia Erivo in HARRIET Scarlett Johansson in MARRIAGE STORY Saoirse Ronan in LITTLE WOMEN Charlize Theron in BOMBSHELL Renée Zellweger in JUDY

Honestly, the worst category of the evening - and I'm throwing hair and make-up in there. They had some exclusions - no, not you JLo(w) - but they might just give it to Johansson. The academy loves loves loves portrayals of dead celebrities - I mean, how else do you explain Jamie Foxx having one?  But I really don't want it to be Zellweger, but you know it's gonna be. 

Performance by an actress in a supporting role nominees: Kathy Bates in RICHARD JEWELL Laura Dern in MARRIAGE STORY Scarlett Johansson in JOJO RABBIT Florence Pugh in LITTLE WOMEN Margot Robbie in BOMBSHELL

Possible Johansson could upset this, as she won't get (I don't think) the lead award. But Dern was so smarmy in her role, as I said before, I disliked her from the word 'go', so she did her job. 

Best animated feature film of the year nominees: HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON: THE HIDDEN WORLD Dean DeBlois, Bradford Lewis and Bonnie Arnold I LOST MY BODY Jérémy Clapin and Marc du Pontavice KLAUS Sergio Pablos, Jinko Gotoh and Marisa Román MISSING LINK Chris Butler, Arianne Sutner and Travis Knight TOY STORY 4 Josh Cooley, Mark Nielsen and Jonas Rivera

Do you really want to bet against Pixar ?

Achievement in cinematography nominees: THE IRISHMAN Rodrigo Prieto JOKER Lawrence Sher THE LIGHTHOUSE Jarin Blaschke 1917 Roger Deakins ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Robert Richardson 

Hands down - just for the technical aspect. That said, the Lighthouse had a cool look to it. 

Achievement in costume design nominees: THE IRISHMAN Sandy Powell and Christopher Peterson JOJO RABBIT Mayes C. Rubeo JOKER Mark Bridges LITTLE WOMEN Jacqueline Durran ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Arianne Phillips 

Throw the girls a bone already. 

Achievement in directing nominees: THE IRISHMAN Martin Scorsese JOKER Todd Phillips 1917 Sam Mendes ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Quentin Tarantino PARASITE Bong Joon Ho

This is one of the two that could do me in. It's going to be my selection or Joon Ho. Either are deserving. I'd be surprised as shit if it were Scorsese or Tarantino. 

Best documentary feature nominees: AMERICAN FACTORY Steven Bognar, Julia Reichert and Jeff Reichert THE CAVE Feras Fayyad, Kirstine Barfod and Sigrid Dyekjær THE EDGE OF DEMOCRACY Petra Costa, Joanna Natasegara, Shane Boris and Tiago Pavan FOR SAMA Waad al-Kateab and Edward Watts HONEYLAND Ljubo Stefanov, Tamara Kotevska and Atanas Georgiev 

It's about bees........and I hear we need them to live. So.........sure. 

Best documentary short subject nominees: IN THE ABSENCE Yi Seung-Jun and Gary Byung-Seok Kam LEARNING TO SKATEBOARD IN A WARZONE (IF YOU’RE A GIRL) Carol Dysinger and Elena Andreicheva LIFE OVERTAKES ME John Haptas and Kristine Samuelson ST. LOUIS SUPERMAN Smriti Mundhra and Sami Khan WALK RUN CHA-CHA Laura Nix and Colette Sandstedt

It seems like skateboarding girls would scare me, so I don't dare NOT give them the nod. 

Achievement in film editing nominees: FORD V FERRARI Michael McCusker and Andrew Buckland THE IRISHMAN Thelma Schoonmaker JOJO RABBIT Tom Eagles JOKER Jeff Groth PARASITE Yang Jinmo

Cut to Damon........then cut to Bale.......and back......now to the car.......now to the other car....and back again........and..........

Best international feature film of the year nominees: CORPUS CHRISTI Poland Directed by Jan Komasa HONEYLAND North Macedonia Directed by Ljubo Stefanov and Tamara Kotevksa LES MISÉRABLES France Directed by Ladj Ly PAIN AND GLORY Spain Directed by Pedro Almodóvar PARASITE South Korea Directed by Bong Joon Ho

While I could be wrong on Best Pic, and if Parasite wins that, it could also possibly pick up Foreign Film too. Again, I liked it, but I LOVED Pain and Glory. ...and again, I'd be happy to lose the entire contest here, if Almodóvar picked up this prize.

Achievement in makeup and hairstyling nominees: BOMBSHELL Kazu Hiro, Anne Morgan and Vivian Baker JOKER Nicki Ledermann and Kay Georgiou JUDY Jeremy Woodhead MALEFICENT: MISTRESS OF EVIL Paul Gooch, Arjen Tuiten and David White 1917 Naomi Donne, Tristan Versluis and Rebecca Cole

I'm going on record saying that the world doesn't need two Megan Kellys. That said, whichever of these three made up Charlize Theron deserves the award for that spot on transformation. 

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original score) nominees: JOKER Hildur Guðnadóttir LITTLE WOMEN Alexandre Desplat MARRIAGE STORY Randy Newman 1917 Thomas Newman STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER John Williams

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original song) nominees: "I Can't Let You Throw Yourself Away" from TOY STORY 4 Music and Lyric by Randy Newman "(I'm Gonna) Love Me Again" from ROCKETMAN Music by Elton John Lyric by Bernie Taupin "I'm Standing With You" from BREAKTHROUGH Music and Lyric by Diane Warren "Into The Unknown" from FROZEN II Music and Lyric by Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Robert Lopez "Stand Up" from HARRIET Music and Lyric by Joshuah Brian Campbell and Cynthia Erivo

Oh you know it's gonna be this big old queen, so he can finally have an Oscar at her Oscar party. 

Best motion picture of the year nominees: FORD V FERRARI Peter Chernin, Jenno Topping and James Mangold, Producers THE IRISHMAN Martin Scorsese, Robert De Niro, Jane Rosenthal and Emma Tillinger Koskoff, Producers JOJO RABBIT Carthew Neal and Taika Waititi, Producers JOKER Todd Phillips, Bradley Cooper and Emma Tillinger Koskoff, Producers LITTLE WOMEN Amy Pascal, Producer MARRIAGE STORY Noah Baumbach and David Heyman, Producers 1917 Sam Mendes, Pippa Harris, Jayne-Ann Tenggren and Callum McDougall, Producers ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD David Heyman, Shannon McIntosh and Quentin Tarantino, Producers PARASITE Kwak Sin Ae and Bong Joon Ho, Producers

My other possible downfall category. Again, it's coming down to 1917 or Parasite. I'm taking a calculated guess, like Roma last year - the academy will play it safe since they can give Parasite the best foreign film prize. 

Achievement in production design nominees: THE IRISHMAN Production Design: Bob Shaw Set Decoration: Regina Graves JOJO RABBIT Production Design: Ra Vincent Set Decoration: Nora Sopková 1917 Production Design: Dennis Gassner Set Decoration: Lee Sandales ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Production Design: Barbara Ling Set Decoration: Nancy Haigh PARASITE Production Design: Lee Ha Jun Set Decoration: Cho Won Woo

It can't be easy to make LA look 1969 again. But I said something similar a few years ago with Carol and lost my shirt on that one. 

Best animated short film nominees: DCERA (DAUGHTER) Daria Kashcheeva HAIR LOVE Matthew A. Cherry and Karen Rupert Toliver KITBULL Rosana Sullivan and Kathryn Hendrickson MEMORABLE Bruno Collet and Jean-François Le Corre SISTER Siqi Song

....because both Mike and I are hair challenged.......though he's in denial. 

Best live action short film nominees: BROTHERHOOD Meryam Joobeur and Maria Gracia Turgeon NEFTA FOOTBALL CLUB Yves Piat and Damien Megherbi THE NEIGHBORS’ WINDOW Marshall Curry SARIA Bryan Buckley and Matt Lefebvre A SISTER Delphine Girard

This is not an educated guess. It's just a guess. 

Achievement in sound editing nominees: FORD V FERRARI Donald Sylvester JOKER Alan Robert Murray 1917 Oliver Tarney and Rachael Tate ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Wylie Stateman STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER Matthew Wood and David Acord 

I'm going out on a limb with this one. Vroom vrooom!

Achievement in sound mixing nominees: AD ASTRA Gary Rydstrom, Tom Johnson and Mark Ulano FORD V FERRARI Paul Massey, David Giammarco and Steven A. Morrow JOKER Tom Ozanich, Dean Zupancic and Tod Maitland 1917 Mark Taylor and Stuart Wilson ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Michael Minkler, Christian P. Minkler and Mark Ulano

...and then swinging back to safe territory with this choice. 

Achievement in visual effects nominees: AVENGERS: ENDGAME Dan DeLeeuw, Russell Earl, Matt Aitken and Dan Sudick THE IRISHMAN Pablo Helman, Leandro Estebecorena, Nelson Sepulveda-Fauser and Stephane Grabli THE LION KING Robert Legato, Adam Valdez, Andrew R. Jones and Elliot Newman 1917 Guillaume Rocheron, Greg Butler and Dominic Tuohy STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER Roger Guyett, Neal Scanlan, Patrick Tubach and Dominic Tuohy

I think we all know it won't be the Irishman, but with al the others so deep into CGI, you'd think it wouldn't be one of the two that don't look it - which is why it will go to my choice. 

Adapted screenplay nominees: THE IRISHMAN Screenplay by Steven Zaillian JOJO RABBIT Screenplay by Taika Waititi JOKER Written by Todd Phillips & Scott Silver LITTLE WOMEN Written for the screen by Greta Gerwig THE TWO POPES Written by Anthony McCarten

I want Jojo to win something! I thought Two Popes was good, if not all fiction. And Little Women? Everyone's whining of Gerwig not getting a director nod. Should she want one, maybe next time not do a movie that has been done 14 times already. The academy might give it to her, but it's purely consolation. I have only seen previews for the Irishman, but correct me if I'm wrong - it's GoodFellas / Casino / Godfather with Italians playing Irish guys - right? 

Original screenplay nominees: KNIVES OUT Written by Rian Johnson MARRIAGE STORY Written by Noah Baumbach 1917 Written by Sam Mendes & Krysty Wilson-Cairns ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD Written by Quentin Tarantino PARASITE Screenplay by Bong Joon Ho, Han Jin Won Story by Bong Joon Ho

Sorry Sam, 1917 was a good movie, and while not adapted, the story itself was hardly original. Tarantino has two screenplay awards, he won't get three. Knives Out could pull an upset, but I don't think so. Parasite is the most original......by far. 

So, I'd like to thank the Academy for how few digs I took at my competitor in the above section. I should get an award for that.  Maybe two. I dare say, our award chat will bring some snipes (from him about me) and I'll just have to be the mature one here.

But stop back on Tuesday for the recap. I know you're all dying to know. Or perhaps, just dying.

We will see how this goes.



Song by:  R.E.M.

Stacked Actors

How is this even possible?

Mike and I are having our 7th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®.   SEVEN!

He calls it the Seven Year Itch - but mostly because his scabies are out of control - nothing a little Kwell won't take care of.

Traditionally, this night has not turned out well for me.

Many of these have ended in a tie. I think I won once and well, he has prevailed more than I.  Of course, there was the infamous miscount of '14.  Mike made sound like Gore v Bush looked like little league compared to that.

But when Mike wins........he gloats. It'd be annoying if he weren't so dreamy.   {psssst.....do you think he bought that?}.

I gloat too.....just not as often.

I'd say maybe I can turn the tide tonight, but I'm not hopeful. While it feels like we've seen a number of these films, some races are too close. If Denzel wins for a movie no one has heard of or seen (including by Denzel himself), well, then, we are fucked.

I've only seen four of the nine best pictures. I think that is one more than Mike has. So, does this double my odds?

The wager?  Well, it used to be cookies. Then I got lazy and purchased cupcakes, though I delivered them personally with like a $83 bar tab he we racked up. This last round, it wasn't even baked good.  I know - right???  Through the miracle or electronics, Mike and his husband got movie tickets from me.  I suppose I could have a bottle of gin delivered if there is a liquor store that does that sort of thing.   ......assuming he wins.

His suggestion?

I'm not sure the amount will make my guesses better, and I don't know how many out-calls he'd have to do to come up with the dough.

Anyhoo - I did make my picks. Mike has claimed to have made his. The reality is, there is usually only a few picks that differ, so the margin is slim.  I now won't make a 'slim' joke. See how mature?

Naturally, I made a comment........or 24.


Best Picture Call Me by Your Name Darkest Hour Dunkirk Get Out Lady Bird
Phantom Thread The Post The Shape of Water Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

I'm hopeful. Get Out or Shape of Water could spoil this.

Best Director Paul Thomas Anderson, Phantom Thread Guillermo del Toro, The Shape of Water Greta Gerwig, Lady Bird Christopher Nolan, Dunkirk Jordan Peele, Get Out


Best Actor Timothée Chalamet -- Call Me By Your Name Daniel Day-Lewis -- Phantom Thread Daniel Kaluuya -- Get Out Gary Oldman -- Darkest Hour Denzel Washington -- Roman J. Israel, Esq.

Sirius Black - for the win. 

Best Actress Sally Hawkins -- The Shape of Water Frances McDormand -- Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri Margo Robbie -- I, Tonya Saoirse Ronan -- Lady Bird Meryl Streep - The Post

It was just a great performance. 

Best Supporting Actor Willem Dafoe -- The Florida Project Woody Harrelson - Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri Richard Jenkins - The Shape of Water Christopher Plummer- All the Money in the World Sam Rockwell -- Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri  ​

You loved to hate him, and then you just kind of loved him. 

Best Supporting Actress Mary J. Blige - Mudbound Allison Janney - I, Tonya Lesley Manville - Phantom Thread Laurie Metcalf - Lady Bird Octavia Spencer - The Shape of Water

It really only comes down to Janney and Metcalf, but Janney has the buzz. Either are deserving, but Metcalf won't give ME, the win!

Best Original Screenplay The Big Sick (Emily V. Gordon and Kumail Nanjiani) Get Out (Jordan Peele) Lady Bird (Greta Gerwig) The Shape of Water (Guillermo del Toro and Vanessa Taylor) Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (Martin McDonagh)

Quite possibly the toughest category of them all. I want the Big Sick to win, but I'm thinking it will go to Get Out.

Best Adapted Screenplay Call Me By Your Name (James Ivory) The Disaster Artist (Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber) Logan (Scott Frank, James Mangold, Michael Green) Molly's Game (Aaron Sorkin) Mudbound (Virgil Williams and Dee Rees) 

Totally worth the win. 

Best Cinematography Blade Runner 2049 Darkest Hour Dunkirk Mudbound The Shape of Water 

I didn't see one of these. Dart. Blindfold. Throw. 

Best Film Editing Baby Driver Dunkirk I, Tonya The Shape of Water Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Oh - because.......why not?

Best Sound Mixing Baby Driver (Julian Slater, Tim Cavagin & Mary H. Ellis) Blade Runner 2049 (Ron Bartlett, Doug Hemphill & Mac Ruth) Dunkirk (Mark Weingarten, Gregg Landaker & Gary A. Rizzo) The Shape Of Water (Christian Cooke, Brad Zoern & Glenn Gauthier) Star Wars: The Last Jedi (David Parker, Michael Semanick, Ren Klyce & Stuart Wilson)

Battles, battles and more battles, so it will be one of the few Dunkirk wins. 

Best Sound Editing Baby Driver (Julian Slater) Blade Runner 2049 (Mark Mangini & Theo Green) Dunkirk (Richard King & Alex Gibson) The Shape of Water (Nathan Robitaille & Nelson Ferreira) Star Wars: The Last Jedi (Matthew Wood & Ren Klyce)

See above. 

Best Original Score Dunkirk (Hans Zimmer) Phantom Thread (Jonny Greenwood) Star Wars: The Last Jedi (John Williams) The Shape of Water (Alexandre Desplat) Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (Carter Burwell)

Best Original Song "Mighty River" -- Mudbound (Mary J. Blige, Raphael Saadiq and Taura Stinson) "Mystery of Love" -- Call Me By Your Name (Sufjan Stevens) "Remember Me" -- Coco (Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Robert Lopez) "Stand Up for Something" -- Marshall (Diane Warren and Lonnie R. Lynn) "This is Me" -- The Greatest Showman (Benj Pasek and Justin Paul)

I almost picked the Greatest Showman thingy.....because of the gays.....and Hugh Jackman (who as picked, because of the gays), but the two who wrote the song won last year, so, that isn't happening twice in a row.  ....and Disney is probably strong-arming folks up to the red carpet. 

Best Animated Feature​ The Boss Baby The Bread Winner Coco Ferdinand Loving Vincent

It's Disney / Pixar. The NRA of animation.  No one shall dare cross them. 

Best Costume Design Beauty and the Beast (Jacqueline Durran) Darkest Hour (Jacqueline Durran) Phantom Thread (Mark Bridges) The Shape of Water (Luis Sequeria) Victoria & Abdul (Consolata Boyle)

oh for g-d's sake, in the movie, Day-Lewis designs dresses!

Best Visual Effects ​Blade Runner 2049 Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Kong: Skull Island Star Wars: The Last Jedi War for the Planet of the Apes

Yeah - you don't know either, so...........

Best Animated Short Film Dear Basketball Garden Party Negative Space Lou Revolting Rhymes

It's more artsy and with a pseudo-message.  Garden Party was cute. Lou? More Pixar, so don't rule it out.

Best Documentary Feature Abacus: Small Enough to Jail Faces Places Icarus Last Men in Aleppo Strong Island

Best Documentary Short Edith + Eddie Heaven is a Traffic Jam on the 405 Heroin(e) Knife Skills Traffic Stop

Crap shoot

Best Foreign Language Film A Fantastic Woman (Chile) The Insult (Lebanon) Loveless (Russia) On Body and Soul (Hungary) The Square (Sweden)

Normally I'd say the Insult because it's the only preview I've seen of the five. But that strategy hasn't worked the best for me in the past. And if I want insults, I'll just wait for Mike to chime in on any of my selections........thankyouverymuch.

Best Production Design Beauty and the Beast Blade Runner 2049 Darkest Hour Dunkirk The Shape of Water

When making a lab for the Creature from the Black Lagoon, well.......you gotta be creative. 

Best Makeup and Hairstyling Darkest Hour Victoria & Abdul Wonder

Victoria &Abdul (not Paula) was in theaters for a week, but it will go to Darkest Hour for making Oldham into Churchill. 

Best Live-Action Short Film ​DeKalb Elementary The Eleven O'Clock My Nephew Emmett The Silent Child Watu Wote/All of Us

Guns in schools hits all the marks these days, no?  Though the trailer I saw for the Eleven O'Clock seemed interesting. 


Well.......I'm about to hit 'publish' there is no going back.


Results post on Tuesday!



Song by: Foo Fighters

I'm a Loser

10.

That is how many categories Mike and I differed on.  Usually it is like 4-6, leaving the margin of error to be very small for a win or loss.

(...and for the record, Blobby did not "open a door" to being called ugly. I was baited and trapped. And yes, the 'ugly' comment might have been taken slightly out of context, but it was a fine fine line.)

I did miss Mike not being home for the broadcast. Well, he did eventually make it home, but he was pulled a few different ways....with Otis and luggage and all.

The last few award shows - whichever they've been - we've live-chatted during. It's made for great fun {of course, I'm only speaking for myself}.  Personally, since he was out in Southern California, I'm not sure why he just didn't pull a few of this strings and get an invite to the shindig.

I guess he's waiting to use that card to get something really really nice..........like a sit down with legendary Oscar winner: Adrian Brody.

Now, Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway might say I had won, but the makers of La La Land thought the same thing, so.......

One never knows where this could go...or how it could turn out.  .....though I think we all know the reality of it......I'm La La Land in this situation.

It started out very strong for me. I was up by two. Then by one. Then tied. Then......well......not.

It seems that seeing 24 movies in a year doesn't pay off in these situations. Do you wanna know how many Mike has seen this year?  Do ya?  Do ya???

One.

One fucking movie.  ....and I don't mean pornography. But I don't don't mean that either. Because I just don't know. I was using the word as an adjective, not a verb.

Truth be told, as much as I wanted to stick with the show, especially since Mike finally caught up on Tivo (isn't it cute he still has Tivo......and actually records award shows?). We could have had a funny exchange......except for the fact that it was after 22:30 and they were only at the 11th award, out of 24.

Mike might have given up on beauty sleep a long time ago, but I still at least try to make the valiant effort.

So I had to get up yesterday a.m. and make my way through the other 13 awards via the news. And since it's all "fake news" who even knows if those are the correct winners they published.

A few years ago, Mike "joked" that it would all come down to the 'adapted screen play' and sure enough it kind of did.  That is where he clinched it.

The breakdown goes (and I have to publish it, so Mike does not think I'm cheating):

BEST PICTURE - we both lost

BEST DIRECTOR - we both won

BEST ACTOR - Blobby wins

BEST ACTRESS - we both won

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR - we both won

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS - we both won

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY - we both won

BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY - Mike wins

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY - we both won

BEST FILM EDITING - we both lost

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS - Mike wins

BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN - Mike wins

BEST COSTUME DESIGN -  we both lose

BEST MAKEUP & HAIRSTYLING -  Blobby wins

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE - we both won

BEST ORIGINAL SONG - we both won

BEST SOUND EDITING - Blobby wins

BEST SOUND MIXING - We both lose

BEST ANIMATED FEATURE - Mike wins

BEST ANIMATED SHORT FEATURE- we both won

BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT FEATURE - we both lose

BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE - we both won

BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT FEATURE - we both lose

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM - we both won


4-3.  It's like a crappy hockey score. Or possibly any Cleveland Browns game.

Now I am on the hook for some kind of treat to send his way.  Maybe a gift card to Krispy Kreme? No - he probably already has a lifetime rewards membership card there - right?

Of course, I could just get treats for Otis. That way I'd fulfill my obligation of a baked treat sent to his address.......and it helps Mike keep that tankini bod.

Whatever I send, I'm 100% sure he'll be gracious about the entire thing.  (where's that eyeroll emoji when you need it?)



Song by: the Beatles