Sunday, March 12, 2023

Playing to Win

It is THAT time. The time of year of which none of you are waiting..........or in which you never participate. The 12th Annual Academy Award Guessing Game®     

It's a horse race. 

That's "horse".  Say it correctly. 

Lord, can you believe Mike and I have been doing this for 12 years? And all because of a flip comment on his blog on how he "always wins the office pool" regarding the Oscars. I took the bait. He challenged. I accepted........and a dozen years later.........here we are. 

Cookies, cupcakes, phone cases, movie tickets, booze and barbs have been exchanged. I'm mostly in it for the barbs...........and the cookies. Lately, there have been no prizes for the winner, which is ok, as I'd be broke. 

Mike had to remind me that the awards were this week, which means I had to do the work of the ballot and getting it to him. Mind you, as he is older, he is retired and has time on his hands. Naturally, those hands are clucthing a martini glass, but you'd still think he could have done a little of the work.    ......you'd think!!

So after I post this, he'll amend his selections to end up beating me by like 2-3 categories. Normally, we try to be witty about our selections, but we'll see. For both of us. 

Yearly, I fight choosing what will win versus what I think should win. I know this going in and I still go with the what should.........hence all my losses to secondest bestest dad to Ollie. 

Let's get this over with.......shall we? 

Best Picture “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans” “Tár” “Top Gun: Maverick” “Triangle of Sadness” “Women Talking”

Honestly, I don't even think this one is a contest, is it?  The movie is a LOT, but at least it doesn't have Tom Cruise in it. 

Best Director Martin McDonagh, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, “Everything Everywhere All at Once” Steven Spielberg, “The Fabelmans” Todd Field, “Tár” Ruben Ostlund, “Triangle of Sadness” 

Yes, I'm bucking the Daniels. I am. This category alone might cause me to lose, but I'll do it in good conscience. While Banshees was sometimes figuratively painful to watch, it was beautifully written and shot. 

Best Actress Cate Blanchett, “Tár” Ana de Armas, “Blonde” Andrea Riseborough, “To Leslie” Michelle Williams, “The Fabelmans” Michelle Yeoh, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

C'mon. You know it's gonna be the Crouching Tiger; Leaping Lizards lady. She was great. 

Best Actor Austin Butler, “Elvis” Colin Farrell, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Brendan Fraser, “The Whale” Paul Mescal, “Aftersun” Bill Nighy, “Living”

Full disclosure: did not see the Whale. If you want to see Fraser in something good, he's in like a 4-5 episode arc of Scrubs from like 18 years ago. Butler was semi-fine, but not win-worthy though I could easily lose this one. Honestly, I originally voted for Farrell, but decided I wanted to win. I still hope Farrell wins. 

Best Supporting Actress Angela Bassett, “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” Hong Chau, “The Whale” Kerry Condon, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Jamie Lee Curtis, “Everything Everywhere All at Once” Stephanie Hsu, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

Condon has pulled off this award at other shows. BAFTA, Golden Globes - though she had that in the bag, as she's foreign herself.  I know the money is on Curtis and personally I like her, but I don't quite get the praise for her in Everything. She was fine. And that's it.  Stephanie Hsu however has NOT be recognized at any award show and she may have been the best part of Everything. 

Best Supporting Actor Brendan Gleeson, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Brian Tyree Henry, “Causeway” Judd Hirsch, “The Fabelmans” Barry Keoghan, “The Banshees of Inisherin” Ke Huy Quan, “Everything Everywhere All at Once”

Yeah, Quan was SUPER annoying as Short Round in the shiteous second Indiana Jones movie- second in annoyance to Kate Capshaw - who fucked her way right to the top. But his racistly named Waymond, is what helped some very confused viewers (read: me) figure out the semi-entire multi-verse thing going on in the movie.  I'm also having a hard time with Gleeson being listed as Supporting here. He was def, co-lead of Banshees

Cinematography “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths” “Elvis” “Empire of Light” “Tár”

I did not see Quiet. Honestly, until the awards were announced I didn't even know they remade this. But I heard people liked it and somehow people love cinematography with war movies. Elvis had its moments for sure, but Luhrmann didn't do much new he hasn't done with all of his over the top visual movies 

Editing “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “Tár” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I'm surprised there are other nominees. A few months ago I lamented on how a filmmaker gets things to screen from a vision. Everything baffles me on every level on how they sold it, let alone made it. Editing doesn't even begin to tell of all the work that had to go in to piece this together. But this editor(s) deserves the award.....and then some. 

Original Screenplay “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans” “Tár” “Triangle of Sadness” 

Triangle of Sadness sounds like Mike's relationship with me and gin.  .....not in that order, I might add. It's hardly original. While I want to go with Banshees, I am leaning towards not. Everything isn't adapted, but I'm not sure it's original either. 

Adapted Screenplay “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery” “Living” “Top Gun: Maverick” “Women Talking” 

Well, it IS Women's History MONTH!.  They should get something!   ....or at least 73% of something. 

 Production Design “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “Babylon” “Elvis” “The Fabelmans”

Sure. Why the hell not? 

International Feature “All Quiet on the Western Front,” Germany “Argentina, 1985,” Argentina “Close,” Belgium “EO,” Poland “The Quiet Girl,” Ireland 

Quiet isn't winning the big best picture category, so it's gonna pull a Roma and win other category to which they were nominated.  This one. 
 
Animated Feature “Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio” “Marcel the Shell With Shoes On” “Puss in Boots: The Last Wish” “The Sea Beast” “Turning Red” 

Artsy Fartsy director meets a story most people think they know. 

Animated Short “The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse” “The Flying Sailor” “Ice Merchants” “My Year of Dicks” “An Ostrich Told Me the World Is Fake and I Think I Believe It”

Listen, I think we all know Mike is gonna pick the "My Year of Dicks".......just because of the title. Yeahhhh.....that's it.  But how are we not rooting for the Ostrich title?   I'd have picked the Dicks one too........if it were 'Years'. Plural. 

Documentary Feature “All That Breathes” “All the Beauty and the Bloodshed” “Fire of Love” “A House Made of Splinters” “Navalny”

Honestly, watching the trailers for all of these, most seem worth of the prize. I think the sentimental will be Splinters, as it's about the Ukraine. But I'm all about BloodshedFire of Love looks great.  

Documentary Short “The Elephant Whisperers” “Haulout” “How Do You Measure a Year?” “The Martha Mitchell Effect” “Stranger at the Gate” 

Who doesn't love a story about an ex-marine who went to blow up a mosque? Tale as old as time. 'Murica!

Live-Action Short “An Irish Goodbye” “Ivalu” “Le Pupille” “Night Ride” “The Red Suitcase”

I have nothing in which to back this up. The trailer looked good and it won the BAFTA prize and the Brits HATE Ireland, so...........it MUST be good

Visual Effects “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Batman” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I suppose Cameron & Co should get something for an 11 year wait and taking in two billion dollars. 

Original Song “Applause” (“Tell It Like a Woman”) “Hold My Hand” (“Top Gun: Maverick”) “Lift Me Up” (“Black Panther: Wakanda Forever”) “Naatu Naatu” (“RRR”) “This Is a Life” (“Everything Everywhere All at Once”) 

I have seen one of these movies - and if I've heard any of these songs, it's been unknowingly.....but, you know....Super Bowl star Rihanna is on this one (I think).  Or Rhianna. I know it's not Rhiannon. So that alone is a win............for me!

Original Score “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Babylon” “The Banshees of Inisherin” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “The Fabelmans”

I'll assume the Fablemans was done by John Williams. ...and he has like 17 of these statues. Literally no one saw Babylon and the few who might have (and I'm talking the reviewers) didn't like it.  Once again, I'm going with Banshees. I don't remember the music at all, save for some pub songs - minus a finger or five. 

Sound “All Quiet on the Western Front” “Avatar: The Way of Water” “The Batman” “Elvis” “Top Gun: Maverick” 

I dunno.  Jet noises?

Makeup and Hairstyling “All Quiet on the Western Front” “The Batman” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Elvis” “The Whale” 

The pomade bill alone was a good chunk of the budget. 

Costume Design “Babylon” “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” “Elvis” “Everything Everywhere All at Once” “Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris”

I kind of want Mrs. Harris to take this. We wanted to see the movie, but missed the window. I'm sure it's streaming somewhere. 

So, the choices are locked in.  

Mike will make fun of me for not staying up for the show. Hell, I'm up at 04:00, and the show is only ending like 2.5 hours before that. I know it won't make me beautiful, but I do need some beauty sleep. 

I'm sure we'll recap this on Tuesday. Hopefully with me as the winner. 



Song by: Little River Band

4 comments:

GregM said...

You nailed it with the comments this year. Thanks for the laughs!

James Dwight Williamson said...

I believe Brendan Fraser who won the SAG award will win the Best Oscar Honor. I’m not interested in anything else.

Anonymous said...

Well here we are. Again. This is perhaps our 25th annual Oscars guessing game. I am sure that Blobby has a detailed spreadsheet showcasing our wins (mine) and devastating losses (his) over the years but really, who cares? Just a friendly competition. No egos.

I think I say every year that I have fallen behind on my movie watching and research in preparation for this contest. (But somehow always win.). This year, I have seen exactly two films on the nomination list: Banshees (loved it) and Elvis (slept through it). So it’s a total crap shoot.

Will be streaming the ceremony on sunday evening and waiting for some Hollywood drama (SLAP!) will chris rock make an appearance? Will Jada show up stag? Will there be fistacuffs of any flavor? My bowl of buttered popcorn will be quivering with anticipation.

Wish me luck, I am jumping in:

Best Picture: Everything, Everywhere. All of my secret sources are predicting a sweep and friends are saying it’s a can’t miss.

Best Director: Daniel and Daniel for Everything, Everywhere.

Best Actress: Michelle Yeoh to the stage please

Best Actor: Brendan Fraser to the (reinforced) stage please.

Best Supporting Actress: here is my dilemma: mixed messages on whether it will be Kerry Condan for Banshees, Angela Basset, an Academy favorite, or Jamie Lee Curtis because she has been around for a long time and has been a hoot during the red carpet season. Eenie meenie miney moe. jamie Lee curtis will take this home

Anonymous said...

Best Supporting Actor: Ke Huy Quan

Cinematagrophy: Big and flashy Elvis will will, although All Quiet probably deserves it

Editing: Everything Everywhere

Original Screenplay: Everything Everywhere (notice a theme?)

Adapted Screenplay: All Quiet. Why not?

Production Design: elvis is in the building

International Feature: All Quiet

Animated Feature: i cannot lie: it will be Pinnochio (we recently watched the original disney flick: stuff nightmares are made of)

Animated Short: my year of dicks, just so Dame Judy Densch can say the words.

Doc Feature: Navalny

Doc Short: Stranger at the gate. (Aka Blobby Visits Provincetown)

Live action short: La Pupille

Visual Effects: Avatar. Saw the first Avatar. Is this sequel really necessary?

Original Song: i am betting blobby will choose “Applause; Tell it like a woman” for obvious reasons. But he should pick Naatu Naatu, as it will take home the gold man

Original Score: All Quiet

Sound: here’s the one award for Tommy Cruise: Top Gun

Makeup and Hairstyling: blobby earns this award every saturday evening — but for this year’s oscars, we will go with Elvis

Costume Design: Elvis Elvis Elvis!!!

That’s it, my Oscar friends! If Blobby can manage to stay awake during the ceremony 1) it will be amazing and 2) a good time will be had by all.

Best of luck to all the competitors and may the smartest and most handsome man win.