Thursday, February 01, 2018

Gift of Screws

This blog post is taking a long time to draft.

I can only type with one hand, and I'm not even looking at on-line porn.

Three months and one day after my fall, I finally had surgery to repair my hand.  I don't think I ever mentioned here surgery was needed as the hand was not healing.

As it turned out, I only needed one screw inserted into the back of my hand, where it will now live in perpetuity.

For those keeping score, this is the 10th screw in my body.  .....and yes, I've played every one of your would-be "jokes" in my head before I committed that line to screen.  But have at it, should it make you feel better.

The arrival and prep probably took longer than the operation. A pre-op tech me to have a good day, I tongue-in-cheek said, "that will up to the surgeon".  She countered with  "......and g-d!".  Touché, OR lady.  Touché.

Before going in, I told 710 I loved him, but if anything happened to me, he was still obligated to go to Sunday dinners with my mother.

I had a great anesthesiologist. I really like my surgeon. I selected the chief of hand surgery, because I'm no fool. I foolishly missed my opportunity to axe him if I could play piano.

Clearly, they ended up intubating me, as my throat is horribly sore. (More joke opportunities right here, folks!).  I laughed at the discharge planner about icing the hand. The one covered in a cast, wrapped in a bandage - neither of which I'm allowed to get wet.

The road to recovery is two weeks in a cast, then 8-12 weeks in a brace and accompanied by PT/OT during the same time frame.

As for work?  I'm off the rest of this week and then will reassess day to day.  Typing, right now, is right hand only. That is tough to do in the office, but maybe some half-days for a while.  We will see.

So this only took me about two hours, with stops and starts. I really need voice dictation software. I'm about to find out what else is going to be limiting.

More to come.

Song by: Lindsey Buckingham


wcs said...

After the first line of your post, this went through my head:

"And I never draft anything unless it is worth taking a long time to draft."

Of course, I'm translating it from Old Entish.

anne marie in philly said...

not laughing at all, dear. serious matter here. not the time for jokes.

the pre-op tech should keep her stupidity to herself.

get well soon.

Anonymous said...

Does this mean I can lots of sarcastic comments on your blog without fear of retribution?
Only joking. Get well soon Blobby.
JP x

Travel said...

Heal well and fast. Take care, DG

Fearsome Beard said...

Sorry dude. Get well fast!