Wednesday, August 16, 2023

Get Out

Back in the day (this what men in their 60's say), my friend Jon and I would go to dinner. Quite frequently, we would not say a word to each other. We didn't have to. 

The people around you offer enough entertainment that we didn't need to subject each other with tales of our day. I don't know if people think their table is some kind of fortress of solitude where they think they are sound-proofed or not.  But.........they're not. 

To this day, we talk about a handful of our eavesdropping / dinner sessions. 

Last night, in a wonderful Thai place in Dupont Circle (great meal!), 710 and I had dinner.   ......and a show. 

One of the guys in this picture showed up early. And looking eager.  The other guy was clearly late and there was little wading in the conversation water. least for one. 

The first question was about the guy in green's birthday. "I won't lie," says he, "I was spiraling".  Honey, you're maybe 30. Maybe. Try doubling that. 

But then the other guy gets right to it:  BREAK-UP. 

I was all over this. 

But  he waits until they fucking order. 

This poor guy in green now has to sit waiting for his food and eat it, while the other guy never. shuts. the. fuck. up. all the while trying to justify the "not in the same place", "working on being friends", "I have to work on myself".  

The phrasing was in such a way that you almost thought he was doing it observationally about another couple. I'm guessing the other guy hoped so too. 

For a second, the guy on the right had his eyes start to well up.  I wanted to just lean over and go, "just. go.   GET OUT". I wish I had his number to text him. 

Still we are like 17 minutes in, and the guy is STILL talking and attempting justification. He's like the cat who plays with the mouse for a long long time before killing it - even though all parties know how it will end. 

The victim - that's what I'm calling him - just sat there, both his legs bouncing like crazy. I felt him - as it is such a tell, and one that I have. Like Restless Leg Syndrome x 10. He was putting on a brave face, but I wanted to cover his appetizer cost just so he could bolt. 

Guy #2 - on the left, the break-up czar - actually looked at his Apple watch in the middle of one of his sentences. "It's your friend.......{i couldn't hear who}".    "Why's he texting you?" was the question. "I dunno, we've just been talking lately".    

Boom. There it is. 

Way harsh, Tai!

Honestly, I don't think the victim truly put 2+2 together. 

Our dinner was done, but I was in no real rush to leave, except they wanted to turn the table, which I can appreciate.  As we were getting up, I really considered just leaning in and say, "Dude - JUST GO!  You can do so much better than this!". 

Maybe I should have. I think if nothing it would have broken the tension..........for him, not the other guy. 



Travel said...

The floor show in my town. Welcome to town.

Old Lurker said...

Personally, I wouldn't date anybody who turned 30 either.

James Dwight Williamson said...

Thirty is the youngest I’d go. From what I see Bachelor #1 shouldn’t be alone long

The Cool Cookie said...

So let me get this right - and remember, I am dyslexic - the guy in the dark green shirt was in a relationship with the bigger guy in the chair? And the bigger guy is dumping Green Shirt?
These dynamics always entertain me. BUT opposites attract.

Blobby said...

Cookie - you are correct. ....and, right?