As g-d is my witness, I did not tamper with this box.
Yes, I think Christie Brinkley is vapid and has all the dance moves that barely beats a blind paraplegic (c'mon, have you seen the "Uptown Girl" video?). And Chuck Norris, that right wing nut job? The pair makes it hard not to fuck with package.
But yet, there we were at Dicks Sporting Goods (for g-d's sake, do not type in dicks.com if you're looking for sporting goods. You won't be finding them. Not there anyways!). And while we looked for new gym clothes, I stumbled upon this and took a closer look:
I can see why anyone who knows me, or reads this blog, would think I did this work of art, as it so is my style. But I swear, I never even shop with Dixon Ticonderoga #2.....anymore.
Naturally, I started making comments about Christie and her failed Hormone Replacement Treatments.
...and I'll still take that over Norris' threats to run for president in 2012.
Song by: Juliana Hatfield