Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Sand and Water

The things we do in the name of business - or a job. It can just be horrid.

Take yesterday.....................please! (thank you Mr. Youngman!)

Yesterday, I played golf. Yes, golf. Clubs, balls, tees, flags and carts. Does this sound like me? Well.........the me that you guys think you know?

It really doesn't, but I can give you a little background filler: I have been playing golf off and on since I was seven. I grew up on a course and during those summer months, my parents kicked me out of the house at least twice a week for lessons - for years on end.

Fast forward a few decades, I'm still as capable of a golfer as I was when I was seven. As my father would tell me continually, "Drives for show, putts for dough". I was neither showy or a money-maker. I could do neither, but my short-game was, and is, particularly horrid. They don't call me "three putt Blobby" for nothing. Actually, the entire time I golfed and had to golf with him would borderline ruin what little relationship we had.

I find golf to be a lot like gambling. You suck at it for a long long time (or lose hand after hand - depending on which side of the analogy you're on here) and just as you're about to totally walk away, you do well - and it just draws you back in.

I had not picked up my clubs in over a decade and really thought I was done for good - not that I ever got rid of them though. But in business, sometimes you have to do things you don't particularly feel like doing. Such as golfing.

The fretting over this adventure had been nagging at me for weeks. Not enough for me to go to a driving range so I wouldn't be a complete embarrassment. Noooooooo. My recent back-thing was of concern too....all that swinging and turning couldn't be good - right? (oddly enough, I think it helped me in that arena.)

Here's the thing......I didn't suck at it. We played Firestone Country Club, you know the course where Tiger Woods just got the worst score in his entire career? I didn't do quite as well as he did, but I also didn't bang 19 skanks either, so........there's that.

I had some decent shots and a lot a number of awful ones too. This course had a lot of sand and a lot of water - and I found a bunch of them. But unlike other outings, I didn't just stop talking to people by the 12th hole and pout the rest of the way.

I am sooooo mature now!

But I thought I'd share a few pics of the day. Nothing too exciting.

The driving range. If it weren't for the clouds, I think it would just a ho-hum picture, but I think it came put pretty neat.

Some hole with some water I had to get around. You'd be surprised how many holes you have to go over water, there is no around.

I loved the fancy-schmancy toilet paper press where they had to emboss the name of the club onto something you'd wipe your ass with. Doesn't that sully the good Firestone name?

Can you see the V? Can you???

I'm such an idiot. I slathered my head with sunscreen, but didn't think that I was wearing a V neck t-shirt and a golf shirt. Yes, I singed myself again. I know some of you will say I should have learned my lesson, but clearly I haven't.

I think it's like this - if I went out in the sun more often for something other than a bike ride, I would, but I don't. So even when I think I do the right thing, I don't. Not completely. You don't even want to see the top part of my arms below the elbow.

Here's the really scary thing - I think I might want to go out and play another round soon. Avec sunscreen.

Song by: Beth Nielsen Chapman


Cubby said...

The last paragraph made me smile. You seem to be so competitive at the gym and with biking, forcing yourself to do more, pushing yourself through injuries even though you know you shouldn't. Something tells me you are not going to let golf defeat you.

Golf is a challenge just like anything else. Nobody's ever happy playing it. No matter how well people do, they always dwell on their poor holes. (Pun most definitely intended).

And speaking of Tiger's 19 skanky pole dancers... Don't be so condemning. Working a pole isn't easy. Could you do better?

AJohnP said...

I golfed once, and it was one of the worst sporting experiences of my life.
I appreciate the fact that people enjoy it, but I'll happily just meet you at the clubhouse!

Nick UK said...

LOL at the sunburn, my husband is a farmer and so has a farmers tan, head, neck and forearms, he doesnt have much hair and is religious about slapping some sunscreen on his scalp, but every year we go on holiday and he burns himself by forgetting to screen the extra exposed skin, and I'm talking feet and upper arms here, I've given up, he's a grown up and I have me and 3 children to cover up. When you find the answer let me know.

Birdie said...

I play golf approximately every seven years. I don't have clubs, but my husband is a golf rep and he just pulls out a sample set for me. He used to be a pro and teacher, so I don't totally suck. But I'll never undertand why they call this a "game."

tornwordo said...

bang 19 skanks? Did you just make that up? It made me burst out laughing.

anne marie in philly said...

I can see the V and the fuzz...I like the fuzz better.

and I have never played golf and never will. no interest in it.

Ur-spo said...

I have never understood this golf mania. I guess i lack the genes.