the Queen is Dead

Yup, EIIR is still dead.  ....and now buried.  Well kind of. 

I guess she's in a place, but not the final place. I mean, it's not like they didn't have 96 years to figure out the deets. 

Measure twice. Dig once. I think that's the rule of thumb. 

That said, I saw none of the pomp and circumcision (not a typo). I didn't need to or care to. Last I looked, we aren't one of the UK's colonies anymore, and while I'm sure she was a fine woman, I just. don't. care. 

The few things I read about days ago only consisted of what Megan Markle was or wasn't doing right. It was all very Mean Girls. Why should royals be any less petty and controlling than anyone else? 

I think everyone is just mad because Prince Harry is banging her and not them. Come to think of it, I'm a little peeve about that as well.  I can't recall ever having "had" a ginger. 

I'll give it to the Naval Guard (or whatever they're called).  Can you imagine the crapping of the pants that would have happened should they have shifted and the crown and scepter when crashing to the ground? 

At least I'd have paid to see that. 

Song by: the Smith

Drive Thru Man

As you know, I'm a big reader of the daily obituaries. Though, that said, our local paper has redone the format and I'm not a fan. 

So much so, that I kind of breeze through most of them now. Maybe I don't care for change that much after all. 

Anyhoooo......if you read them, especially over the last few months, there has been a shift in them.....obvi. 

Like anything else these days, how one has - or doesn't have - a funeral has changed.   

The obits will always say "a celebration will be had at a later date to be announced".  BTW - the longer this virus carries on, the chance of that "later date" is zero. But we've gone from no funerals at all, to small ones with masks and social distancing required to 'drive thru' funerals. 

Now, I've read this and assumed things - and not necessarily incorrectly, but had not really given it tons of thought. Until last week. 

My cousin's wife passed away - expectedly unexpected.  I got a text from his daughter, who is closer in age to me than he is, telling me of his wife's passing. She mentioned the drive-thru funeral, which started this part of the chain (I'm in blue): 

Let it not be said that I am ever appropriate. Good thing Louise is usually on the same page as I. 

So yesterday was the day. I drove the 90 minutes to basically go through a drive through. And no drink or sammich to go with it. 

Not knowing how this would work, or the volume of cars, I got there shortly after the start. Only four cars ahead of me.....as you can see.  

As you pull in, a man takes the info you would have put into a guest book, then you get in queue. I happened to notice the two cars behind me were two other cousins. As we were just waiting (if the line got too long, I'm assuming the funeral folks would have urged things along), I got out of my car, and they theirs, and we stood 20' away from each other - with masks - and caught up briefly. I hadn't seen either one of these guys since my mother's service / celebration a year ago. 

Actually, now that I think of it, the last FIVE times I've seen them has been at funerals. And Dan I saw a sixth time, at the World Series a few years back. 

But then I pulled up under the portico, and my cousin, his kids and their spouses were there - with masks - and we got to chat for a few moments, express condolences and a promise of getting together when this is all over - or outside at a large table. 

Oh, and the casket was outside too, but not out with the family, but close to the actual building. Unless you truly looked, you wouldn't even see it. 

Louise and I - beforehand - mentioned how weird it all was, but clearly nothing was mentioned at the time. It was almost odd how not so odd it actually was. Not that I'd want to do this often, but that's true of any funeral. 

Welcome to the new normal. 

Song by: Nick Lowe

Shake it Off

I cannot stop watching this.

Two things strike me with this entire clip / scenario:

1. Moscow Mitch honestly can't believe someone would think so little of him, that they'd out and out ignore his hand.
2. Moscow Mitch turns to Chuck Schumer, almost in disbelief. I'll give Chuck this, he didn't burst out laughing, as I would have. 

But this also tells me that Chuck is probably way more compassionate to Mitch than we'd like to believe. It's the same stories as Ruth Bader Ginsberg actually being friends with Scalia.  Washington DC is all very incestuous that way.

That said - I'm glad for the mourner to not be polite to a man who has thwarted so many things in DC, especially to the people of colour and the impoverished.

I am equally committed to giving $$$ to the person who will be running against Moscow Mitch in 2020......and I don't even fucking live in Kentucky.

He must go.




Song by: Taylor Swift  (ok, I don't own this, but I had nothing else to go with the post so effectively)

Celebration

Today is the day.  Closure.

Well, in a way.

Later this morning, we will be having a 'celebration' for my mother.  It's not a funeral, it's not a memorial, per se.

What it will be is like 97 degrees.

What it will have is a more casual dress code due to the heat, food and most importantly, an open bar.

It's mid-day, so I'm not expecting a lot of drinkers, but you never know. I'm not saying I'm going to tie one on, but let's put it this way, I'm not planning on being the one to drive home.

I honestly don't know how many people will be coming. I planned food for 100. I invited her three remaining nieces and nephews and had them disseminate the 4-1-1 down to their kids. I told her favourite person at her job of 28 years, and she told the staff and former staff from there. I never asked for RSVPs, but I'm sure it's all good.

I know about 50 who will be coming. So that leaves another 50 randoms who read the obits and will become funeral crashers.

Unlike my dad's funeral, where I pretty much knew what I was going to say, all I know for tomorrow is how I'll open and close. The in between part? Improvise.

For the most part, it's a completely known audience, so I don't think it will be horrible, but stay tuned.......I'm sure I'll let you know either way.  Should it really suck, I'm guessing someone will upload YouTube footage.


That image is my mother back in 1929, at around 6 mos old. It will be part of a "slide show" that will be playing at the venue. 




Song by: Madonna

the Policy of Truth

As you have no doubt read earlier, I'm not a huge fan of John McCain. Yet, I ended up watching the funeral, mostly because 710 had it on. And you never know - the pall bearers might trip and the body might pop out of the casket.

Man - the service was way too long with way too many speakers or folks who had 13 second bible quotes to read, but took a minute and 43 seconds to walk up there and the same amount of time for the dismount.

The audience was a collective who's who of DC - past and present.  The usual suspects - three of the five ex-presidents, at least three ex-vice presidents. A butt load of senators - former and current - including Dole, Snow, Warren, Kasich, Lieberman, and McCain's "best friend in the Senate", Miss Lindsey Graham.  Oh, and Warren Beatty - naturally!

Poor Linds only got one of those 13 second bible versus. He seemingly had what looked like a name tag pinned on his suit that probably said Night Manager - HoJos: Lindsey.

I don't feel for Ms. Graham. He now parrots everything BLOTUS says. When the 2016 campaign was going on, he was quite vocal about many things, being anti-BLOTUS. Except he never quite went to bat for McCain (his "friend") when BLOTUS mocked him.  Fair weather, it seems.

I don't want to tell anyone how to grieve, but.....................you know I'm gonna.

Glioblastoma is fatal about 99.7% of the time. During the two year diagnosis / treatment time, how does a family not come to grips with this early on and work through the process?  They seem well educated and have the means to medical care that would give them the 4-1-1.  Even an internet search would provide that (thanks Al Gore!).

But you had Megan (?) up there teeter-tottering on being fierce or out and out blubbering. I was waiting for at least one of her fake eyelashes to come off.  I know I'm being petty. I just think her words (or whomever wrote them), were lost a bit with tears.

"We gather here to mourn the passing of American greatness, the real thing, not cheap rhetoric from men who will never come near the sacrifice he gave so willingly, nor the opportunistic appropriation of those who live lives of comfort and privilege while he suffered and served," 

And she made the comment on "America has always been great".  But why-oh-why were the hundreds of tv cameras not focused on Jared and Ivanka at that very moment???

I would have paid big $$$ to see their stupefied reaction.    .....and it was Saturday, so why wasn't Jared in Temple?  And better yet, why was he there at all?  Or his skanky wife?

Kissinger spoke (I know, right?). He mentioned how McCain barely ever talked about his POW days. No shit. He didn't have to. Everyone did it for him. Lord knows every single person did yesterday. You'd think he did nothing else in his life.  I loved how someone mentioned how it didn't define him - by defining him by the very fact.

Shrub talked too. It's amazing. Compared to the current president, in my walnut sized brain, I kind of thought he might not be so bad. But he is. The second I had to hear that voice, I cringed. And yes, by comparison, of course he seems "ok" - but then you think of all the horrible horrible things he did in office - and seeing Cheney in that front row made it all too real.  I listened to him speak and yet never heard to a word.

Then it was Obama's turn. He's everything Shrub and BLOTUS are not when it comes to oration. There are times when Obama plays it too cool, but it was a funeral, so I'm hoping others heard his words.  They were great if not at a very even cadence:

“So much of our politics, our public life, our public discourse can seem small and mean and petty, trafficking in bombast and insult and phony controversies and manufactured outrage. It’s a politics that pretends to be brave and tough but in fact is born in fear."

Perfect.

I'd say: "hear that BLOTUS?", but he didn't. He was on a golf course (shock!!!)  at one of his own properties (shock!!!).   I'm sure he'll hear it / about it and twat something at 03:25.

I almost typed - "he won't go after McCain's daughter.....the day of / after her dad's services", but the man has no tact, discretion, decency, so.........yeah, her take down is coming too.

Blobby hasn't listened to the commentary afterwards. I'm not sure I need to. Chuck Todd, the chinless wonder,  and his prattling during the event was more than enough.



Song by: Depeche Mode

Fancy Funeral

So few people put the 'fun' in 'funeral'.  What's up with that???

I make no secret that I read the obituaries daily. Well....when we get a printed paper. So three days per week, I don't peruse them on-line. I'm not that motivated.

So I missed the one where our former CIO up and died last week. I got an email from a former colleague and then sought out the obit. There was little information, other than calling hours and funeral services.

I liked Chuck enough to stop by the calling hours. I had no intention of going to a service. It turns out a lot of people opted for calling hours. I was stopped by 30 minutes into the two hour block and I was back of the line, which was at the door. I parked like a block away. No room in the lot.

I saw a few people from work - as it was a Sunday afternoon - but no one else I would know. No reason I should. I really wanted to sign the book and leave. But unlike other funeral homes, the book wasn't in the waiting area. Noooooooo.........the line snaked from the door, through the waiting area into the room - around the perimeter. And only on the third wall, was "the book".

Balls.

I didn't feel like just cutting in front of all, signing the book and then dash out. So I waited.  ....and waited.  ...and waited.

And I looked around. A lot.

One of my first observations that it was going to be open casket. You couldn't tell that from the entry way. I'm not fond of open caskets - people will say how good or natural the person looks, but they never do.

Secondly, I was way overdressed.

Actually, I was not. I felt I was under dressed as I wore dress pants, dress shirt and a sport coat. I didn't wear a suit or a tie. Please enlarge the image. Notice the girl with the off the shoulder number, bra strap showing and her told open toed flip-flops.  My lord.

I'd like to say she was the extreme, but she wasn't.

I ended up greeting the family. The wife was, "I'm sorry.......I'm drawing a blank...."  I told her she was off the hook, she didn't know me and that I worked with Chuck.

I stuck around a bit to chat with some people from the old office whom I don't get to see much.

As odd as it is to say, I liked my father's service much more - as much as anyone can like those kinds of things. There was no 'receiving line' - which just seems odd. It was much more of a casual greeting kind of thing. And no dead body on display.

Anyone who tries to say that 'we should celebrate their life' is kidding themselves. I'm not saying we shouldn't - I'm just saying it rarely happens (though my cousin Billy pointed out to his wife how much I was laughing during Shiva for his father.....but his father would have liked that).

It will be a hard habit to break, but I have to stop reading the obits. More and more I see people "my age"appearing in them. It is borderline depressing.

Though not as depressing as Chuck's calling hours.


(and yes, I know it was tacky of me to take a pic at the funeral home, but at least my bra strap wasn't showing!)




Song by: Lucinda Williams