Guilt is a Useless Emotion
This whole thing about leaving my job has evoked an emotion in me which normally remains absent: Guilt
I think that's what I'm feeling.
Taking my soon to be new job is the right decision. This I believe (maybe I should do an NPR piece!). But for the most part, I think you tell your boss you are leaving and that is usually where it ends. Not me.
I have, or get, to tell my remote work sites - the folks who report to me. There are 17 of those. I also get to tell the 12 clients that are associated with those sites. So, I get to have this conversation about 30 times.
Oddly enough, I find myself apologizing for leaving. Why is this?
I've thought about it, albeit, not tons, or deeply. But each time I dial that last number of whomever I'm calling, I get a small knot in my gut, at least momentarily. I haven't even told most of the people in my home office. I kind of want to just slink away at the end of next week and go gently into that good night.
I would like to think there are one half dozen of folks I worked with at this job that I can keep in touch with. I know that is probably a high number. Everyone wants that, but I just don't think that normally happens. Half of that half dozen would be an ok number. At least they'd be the ones I really would do things with.
Missing my areas and some co-workers must be a testament to liking whom I work with. But why feel guilty about it?
Song by: New Order