Thursday, December 03, 2009

The Trick is to Keep Breathing


So on Tuesday I made my way to an otolaryngolgist. ....or as you might know of them, an Ears, Nose and Throat guy.

Really, I only went for the nose part, since I've got a big schnoz and all. It's not that I want to reduce it, I like it the way it is. But for as big as it is, it would be nice to actually be able to get air through it. ...at least the left side. My left, not stage left.

This is not a new affliction - it's been constant for as long as I can remember. I'm just considering fixing it now. Well.....reconsidering it.

I'd say about 20 years ago, I went to an ENT in Columbus and the old coot physician said he could fix it, but there was only a 70% chance it would be better. I needed better odds than that. At that time, after the procedure, your sinus cavities were packed with gauze and only one way to take it out. My understanding was, that was more painful than the surgery itself. "Blinding white-hot pain" was the description. I was out.

Now it is two decades later and technology, success rates and NO packing have come a long way. So, I'm back to checking it all out.

The appointment / evaluation was quick. I snapped a quick pic of the instruments he might use on me.

He only used the three from the left. The one on the far left made me feel like I was probably looking like Link Hogthrob. Oh, how I wish. It was probably more like Dr. Strangepork. As ridiculous as it may have looked, for the time he had me pried open, I could breathe.

One instrument not pictured was also used - a fiber-optic camera that went right up my nostril. It didn't hurt, but it sure felt weird. He talked about how far back the deviation actually was, but it is fixable - with surgery, obviously.

A 45 minute procedure. No packing. One stitch.

The surgery cannot replicate my current nighttime breathing mode: sleeping with my thumb pulling along my sinus to keep it open. Oddly enough, that is more effective than the surgery can do. More odd? I can pretty much do that through the night....or most of it. I've trained myself well.

There is a huge downside to the procedure though: no exercise for 10 days!


Song by: Garbage

2 comments:

Birdie said...

You do have some pretty amazing talents. If you go for it, do what the doctor says.

Larry Ohio said...

"...sleeping with my thumb pulling along my sinus to keep it open. Oddly enough, that is more effective than the surgery can do."

Why are you even considering surgery when your own solution is more effective? Don't let those butchers f___ you up!

When you are doing your risk assessment, think of this: MRSA. Blobby, just say no.