February

Wow. One-twelfth of the year already gone. How'd that happen?

So far, I'm not a huge fan of 2015. Some good folks I know have had tragedy befallen upon their house. Deaths of children and parents. It has not been auspicious start to the year.

Nancy, who is the female in the image, was my boss years ago. I will argue, she is one of - if not - the smartest person I have ever met.

That she was funny, clever and supportive was just icing on the cake. She has been my biggest and best career mentor.

The unexpected death of her college-aged son must be horrible. I couldn't even truly imagine how she feels. I haven't been able to talk to her - nor would I try at this early of a time - but I got a note off to her and her husband. Not that they're there to receive it. They are at his college, where a nice memorial was held, and Nancy, being Nancy, was nothing but gracious and articulate in the newspaper articles I Goooooogled.

The parent thing, was another friend - also a friend of Nancy's and myself. Both her parents died in a house fire the following day. Another scenario at which I am unequipped to comprehend.  I mean, what a shitty week.

At least (?) that is local, so I will be able to pay my respects in person, but still............

Or I should be able to pay my respects, depending on the arrangements and the weather.

Starting today, we're in for our first big storm of the season..............allegedly. Depending on which report or the pat of the storm we're looking at 6".....or 11".  It's just like last call at the gay bars.

Weather aside - let's hope February turns things around for this year. We still have a ways to go to make it better, but in my estimation is has nowhere to go but up.



Song by: Dar Williams

Payin' the Cost to be the Boss

It was a matter of 'when', not 'if.

I travel a lot. The boss who hired me when we moved to Cleveland, way back in 1996, also travels a lot. We parted ways about 12 years ago and I haven't seen him for 11. But with all of my ins and outs at the airport, running into him was bound to happen - right?

Clint and I had a weird relationship. I spent more time with him for almost three years than I did with Denton. Actually, I did spend more time with him.

I was the only male who reported directly to him and he provided me tons of opportunities - which really helped me become the professional I was. However, he also provided me with how not to be a manager. His appropriateness, or lack of, were just textbook on what not to do or how not to behave.

That being said, the man helped fuel my heavy drinking. We'd go out 3-4 nights per week after work. We'd even stop to get a drink on the way out to drink. Denton was not outwardly unhappy with me, but was relieved when Clint and work parted ways. He didn't like it when I was out until 11pm drunk drunk drunk.....and then drive home that way. That I never had an accident or DUI is a major miracle. I should be beatified by now.

He even intruded on times when out of town friends would come to Cleveland. Morty and Becca can attest to this.....though Morty made the most of it with funny, still-used quips.

On the plus side, he turned me onto darts, and I played so often, I own two sets and became quite good at it. But I was playing 3-4 nights a week.....and doing it drunk.

Denton and I would go out with Clint and his wife quite often for dinner, but I was always so uncomfortable in how he treated her, and she really was a nice woman. But it got to the point that we just stopped accepting invitations and then it just became no communication for the last decade.

People I had worked with or that I was in professional organizations would ask me about him, but I had no idea. He really just dropped off the face of my earth.

But there he was - in Concourse D. Standing with a woman not his wife.

Correction: standing with a woman, not the wife that I knew.

I made the first move and went up to say 'hello'. He had to have seen me, but I figure I'd be the "bigger man". It was an ok conversation, but somewhere stilted, and in there he slipped in that "Diane", the woman he was with (I honestly don't remember her name) was his wife. Ooohhhhhh.

Guess the starter-wife, of 25 years, had had enough. Can't blame her for that.

The stranger thing was that she traveled with him weekly, or would never see him. I joked, 'well at least you get to see the sites when he's working 12 hour days'. The answer was 'no', she mostly stayed in the hotel room. Ewwwww. What's up with that?

Weirder - I think - was that when introduced to her, she seemingly recognized me by name. She commented, "he talks about you all the time". I'll say it again: 11 years since I have seen him.

I guess it was nice that he asked about Denton. But hell, he had a new wife, why did he not think I did too? Don't I deserve a trophy husband? (ok, this lady seemed nice, but hardly 'trophy' anything.)

Maybe he was being nice, but said he would like to get together for dinner. I don't think that's a relationship I'd like to start up again. It would be too strange.

However, he is a VP at a big medical firm - and I could always use a new lead.......you know, just in case......



Song by: Pat Benatar

Man Smart, Woman Smarter

Sorry for the late launch, this a.m. Usually there is a post waiting for you, but I had a travel-work day yesterday that lasted a lot longer than anticipated. I was out the door at 06:00 and home at 23:15.

I could have been home at least three hours earlier, but I stopped off in Columbus, my old stomping grounds, to have dinner with my friend Phyllis. Sorry Mort. Sorry Dith. Sorry Tom G. I could have called, but I'll be seeing most of you next week and I had not seen Phyllis for at least a year.

On a whim, as I was leaving my client, I called Phyllis and axed her if she wanted to go meet for dinner and she readily accepted. I was still and hour away, so she had time to get ready. And we went to Cap City diner, mainly for two reasons: it was right off the freeway and it has Maytag Blue Cheese Potato Chips.

Ok, I picked it for one reason - and it wasn't the off-ramp access.

Damn, I love those chips. Too much.

But I love Phyllis too. She is not only my friend, but was my boss for a bit. One that I stayed in touch with over the last 20-21 years. It is safe to say she was my first professional mentor. I really enjoy working with smart people and she is one of them. And she's funny and personable.

I started thinking about it on my way home, that I've had a few really impressionable bosses over the years - and just as many non. But four of the five have been women. Maybe it's my gayness that makes me bond with them, or maybe it's just that they are smarter.

Phyllis helped develop me. Clint (not a woman), truly gave me opportunities and challenges, but he also showed me how not to act - by his example mostly. Heather, whom I still see every day I work out, gave me lots of room to do my own thing and was wicked street smart. Nancy, is possibly the smartest person I know and used to be Clint's and Heather's boss - so she helped bring me along. Then there was Sue, who like Clint, is what you do not want to be in life. But at least she taught me that.

But our little dinner last night lasted 3 hours!!! It was nothing about work and all about our families. I've seen her kids from kindergarten through college (oy!) and her husband through his heart attack. As always, it was fun and way too short, but I had a 2.5 hour drive ahead of me. I had to scoot.

And then this morning, I missed my 05:30 workout call due to being sleepy. But I got my ass there by 6:30 so I could work off those chips. I've added some new ab routines and I am HURTING!


Song by: the Grateful Dead