Needles and Pins

Charlie Kirk's death delayed this post. Another thing for which you can blame him 

I do. 

Wednesday I had a periodontal appointment. I just loathe those. If my fear of the dentist wasn't bad enough, there is zero chance that a periodontist is going to better. 

This would be my third procedure to attempt to fix receding gums on teeth numbers 3 and 14. 

The first "fix" lasted about 10 years. The last one less than five. This one better stand the test of time, as I can assure it it is the last time I'm going through this. 

The first two times were skin graphs off the roof of my mouth. 

Yeah - I just saw you all cringe. 

The first time you're too stupid to truly know what's coming. The second, well, it's nothing but trepidation. 

This time would be different. No skin graphs. Phew. But somehow, someway, they'd put collagen plugs into my gums which would spread / push the existing gums to cover the root of the tooth. 

Now, Blobby has a high pain tolerance. Unfortunate, but true. I don't care how much numbing gel you give me, I'm a-gonna feel the 14 (!!) needle injections into my gums. Some were just pressure. Some were much more. 

Honestly, that is the worst part of it all. That and how your mouth has to be agape for 90 minutes straight. I'm not Luke Wilson acting in just about everything he does.

The aftermath isn't pretty. And sooooooooo many rules. 

• Ice packs every 20 minutes for 48 hours. Clearly not while sleeping. 

• No running for a week (!).  That's gonna be a slight blow to marathon training. 

• No wind instruments!!!!  Now I'll NEVER be a concert flautist.  

• No running your tongue over the surgical sites. Though they didn't say someone else couldn't run their tongue over them. 

• No alcohol. No Smoking. No Marijuana.  No problem. 

• No spitting. No straws (straw!). No gargling. No hot beverages. No gum. 

• No seeds. No nuts. No granola. Nothing crunchy. My morning gruel just got switched to eggs for the next week. 

• No brushing the sites for at least a week. Gingerly brushing everywhere else. With a special brush. For six MONTHS!

• Rinsing with some medicated liquid that turns your tongue brown, 2x / day. 

• Sugar will slow down healing process. Which means my healing is going to be delayed. 

• Oh, and a visit the next day, one week, three weeks, three months and six months afterward. 

All for a low low low cost your dental plan does not cover. 

What is not to love?   I mean, except the swelling and pain. 

I drafted the above the day of, but after, the procedure. To be honest, the pain at most is a 1.5 on the 10 scale. Again - high pain tolerance. Eating is weird. Brushing is too. I don't (think I) look swollen, but I feel it. 

Riding a bike for an hour isn't nearly as satisfying as running six miles. But I gotta do what I gotta do. Technically, I'm only missing four days of running, as two would be my rest days anyway. 

BTW - isn't that a fucked up image of all my teeth??

Song by: Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers with Stevie Nicks