Saturday, September 10, 2005

Plain Dealer Question of the Day

Well, you can't say there isn't a good mix of Grandpa Simpsons in Cleveland. So, the question is/was:

Have you set up an emergency plan in case of a disaster?

and the answers are/were (please comment on your most favouritest):

"After seeing what happened in New Orleans, the only emergency plan I've set up in case of disaster is to buy more bullets for my gun." - Euclid

"We certainly do have an emergency plan, in case of a disaster. I was talking to my wife about it just yesterday. And if you don't have a plan, you're an idiot, because as you can plainly see, your government cannot be relied upon to help you! So you're on your own. Good luck!" - North Olmsted

"Oh, yeah. I'm going to kneel down and pray God takes me, and, when I get there, I'm going to thank him." - Garfield Heights

"My emergency plan in case of a disaster: If it's a minor disaster, it's five quarts of Vodka; if it's a major disaster, five gallons of Vodka. That should do it." - Lakewood

"I think I would get on my bicycle and head for a safe area BEFORE the disaster starts." - Cleveland

"To me, there's no plan for a disaster. Look at 9/11. What stopped those poor people from being incinerated? Or when the planes crashed into the Twin Towers? There was no amount of water, food, can openers or whatever that could save those people. Same thing with New Orleans. Those people that did survive are still in their homes, and the Marines and the National Guardsmen they're going to come and forcibly take from their homes. So there's nothing you can do with a disaster. It's in God's hand, not ours." - Cleveland Heights

"My emergency plan is to catch a ride with the news media. They can get there. They have generators. They have satellite phones. They have transportation. That's my plan." - Cleveland

"No. I have lived off the government my whole life. Why should I start worrying about something like this?" - Cleveland

"Yeah, I have an emergency plan in case of a disaster like that. It would be a .38 Special." - Parma Heights

"Yes. I'm going to take all my wine and head to New Orleans because there's no room for me here since we took all their people in." - Cuyahoga Heights

"No, I don't have an emergency plan, because Cleveland is the best location in the nation. The day we have a disaster like that, I know it must be the beginning of the end of the world." - Cleveland

"With the crisis going on down in New Orleans and Mississippi, my mama always said, 'From the day of your birth, till you ride in a hearse, it could've been worse.' And that's so true. And that means hope, hope, hope and trust." - Sagamore Hills Township

"My plan is that I only plan to pray to the Lord. He has protected me for 80 years, and I'm sure He'll keep on protecting me. I ask him for help, and he always gives me what I need. I thank him all the time." - No city

3 comments:

Blobby said...

I'm partial to the Vodka Plan.

Anonymous said...

My plan is to find the guy with the 5 gallons of vodka and then catch a ride out of town with Ann Curry when she arrives.

Anonymous said...

TEN? you'd win some kind of longevity award if one could last that long.